Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)

@majima

🏳️‍⚧️ Cat-loving disabled autistic. Kamurocho’s #1 Majima simp, kitten wrangler. Pillbug-pilled. Mothmaxxing. Purveyor of deep cuts. Walks with an air of confidence rarely seen in this day and age Buy shit from me!

1431 Siguiendo2931 Seguidores44.370 Publicaciones

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¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y majima.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 28d

Look, hear me out

Nelson de la Rosa, a very tiny man who apparently had a terrible temper, washing white makeup off Marlon Brando’s head with a sponge. They’re dressed the same. From the classic 1996 blockbuster hit, The Island of Dr. Moreau

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Yeah this is way better great job guys

Piles of food waste, and broken garbage bags laying beside a dumpster. If you look too post up, you can see the dumpster overflowing.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Russian Memes United @RussianMemesLtd
just do it, crocodile

[a tiny kitten in a crocodile bed with the following caption in Russian]
ну довай уже крокодильчик

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Sir Terry Pratchett’s words remain evergreen, but like most of the deepest wisdom people refuse to internalize it.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that'd still be keeping his feet dry in ten years' time, while a poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.

This was the Captain Samuel Vimes 'Boots' theory of socio-economic unfairness.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Pretty much any scene where the Ghostbusters come into a restaurant and start acting like a bunch of weirdos

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

A woman wearing large black sunglasses with blood dripping down her cheeks. Caption reads “fetch me a melon baller; i tire of my vision”

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Update: Gotta say I’m proud of the composition on this one. They’re gonna love how it looks when I attach it to my complaint to the health department

A blue dumpster overflowing with trash, bags and boxes literally piled high around and on top of it, spilling out into the parking lot and around the wall. A cloudy, thunderous sky stretches above it and the dumpster and its contents are reflected in the rainy pavement. I call it “Landlords against the wall”

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Tiny King has opinions about the rain

A fat black and gray silkie rooster looking cranky and perturbed. He has feathery feet.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Both my husband showed their enthusiasm for the nuptials by railing the absolute shit out of me but no one is brave enough to put that in the paper

USA
TODAY
USA TODAY
@usatoday.com
Travis Kelce, who married Taylor Swift at Madison Square Garden, showed his enthusiasm for the nuptials by liking several posts from wedding guests.

[a picture of Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift after a football game looking rich and white]

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Oh wow, nice cock

A large orange and black rooster looking kind of sinister as it looks back over its shoulder with its crimson flappy-flappers and comb all over the place

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· 29d

Okay I’m finally going to bed after an absolute roller coaster of a day for my body after I slam one more Pedialyte. I leave you with Sweet Cheeks, one of the cuntiest hens I have ever met, coming for your soul

A black hen with fluffy feathers around her face like a boa or the collar of a fluffy fur coat, strutting severely toward the camera with a look of disdain on her face. She is about to read you FOR FILTH.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 12

CHIP!!!!! Finally

Gordon Ramsey says “delicious
Finally, some good fucking newS”

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 12

One of my senators is Ted Cruz so

A terrible excuse for a human praying “JESUS, I SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE FOR OTHER PEOPLE, AND I WANT THAT FOR ME.”

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

YALL. I got hashtag blessed because someone had put two tokens in a machine and left them there (the place just opened, and I was the only one in it) so this is what my $5 got me!

Three cute plushies in a person’s passenger seat. From left to right they are a knock off Totoro, a cute little white cat that looks kind of like the cat what drums on the counter, and a keychain of Chi the cat from Chi’s Sweet home

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

Okay here we go. All you have to do to get to Hell is…

The inner spread of the pamphlet, which is completely empty of words but filled with flames which are clearly from the same stock photo as the cover art, and a black bar at the bottom with the text: (The answer is ——NOTHING!)

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

New Bible tract at the post office! So excited. I hope there’s a checklist I can work off of, I wanna make sure I get good seats near the heavy metal concert before Dr. Rockzo does all the cocaine

A small greeting card sized Bible tract/pamphlet with photo realistic flames on the front and the title “what must I do to go to HELL?“

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

Friends, I wrote a 15 page paper on themes of transcendentalism in Little Women that was 60% of my final grade, and until the night before it was due, I had not cracked that book open since I finished it in 5th grade. I got the second highest grade in the class (too wordy). [reposted with alt text]

Amelia
@amelia_tweetz
I was told today by a 17-year-old that there was no way people were writing
10 page papers without Al.
Dude, I was writing 10 page papers without having read the book.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

The liberal media won’t tell you this, but VSOP actually stands for “Very Sexy Old Poofter”

John Inman, a British actor from the 70s with very fair hair that could either be gray or platinum blonde. It was so hard to tell. He is looking quite campy as he answers the phone and holds up a neck tie. He is smartly dressed in a pinstriped wide lapel suit with a colorful striped tie because it was the 70s. He has a waist coat and a watch chain, and is looking at you with piercing blue eyes that are smiling and mischievous. He played Mr. Humphries, a character who was very clearly gay, but purposely spoke as if it was ambiguous. he unfortunately, remained closeted most of his life, but he was beloved by all.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 11

It’s Friday night, time to YELL AT THE PLANTS

A small brown tabby and white cat sitting on a metal coffee table yelling. In front of her is some sort of leafy plant and she is giving it what for. She has never been fed a day in her life.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 10

Definitely Not Secondhand Pup Cup Verdict: McDouble: COLD! NO! IS IN MY WHISKS! McFlurry: *tinynyom* dis kinda slaps

A small gray tabby and white kitten delicately licking a puff of non-dairy whipped topping perched on a snowball in a cup.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 10

Your gayest snow cone, please, with the pretentious bisexual sprinkles

A rainbow snow cone with a blue spoon and a dollop of whipped cream absolutely covered in pink, blue, and yellow sugar sprinkles

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 10

The “you wouldn’t download a car” meme but it says “YOU WOULDN’T GENDER A
POSSUM”

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 10

Well, that’s fucking ominous

Paywall message reading “You've read your last free article.“ In bold text centered in the middle of the screen like a warning. Below it is a black box graphic with the words. “UNDERSTAND WHAT'S NEXT“ in the center. Above it, the last lines of the article fade into nothingness behind the paywall.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 9

Good news everyone, I have picked up the boys from the clinic

A warning sign that reads “NOTICE - NUT FREE ZONE” there’s a picture of a peanut in a prohibited sign

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 9

“What do you mean we’re getting tutored“

Two gray tabby and white kittens laying on a comforter in a divot between someone’s legs. One is on his back, looking wide eyed and cute. The other is in a loaf position looking extremely suspicious.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 9

Look whomst was waiting?! Froger Ebert

A Gulf Toad sitting on a porch by a purple caddy.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 8

“It’s impossible to come up with ideas without AI!!!” Me: “…what if Buddha egg pun?”

A half assed sketchy doodle of Gudetama, the lazy egg character sitting in a really half assed lotus position in a lotus flower that looks kind of like it started out as an egg shell on a lily pad that looks like it has a camel toe. He looks annoyed and has a halo. His hands are doing…something. Nearby is a handwritten note “Gudetama Buddha” with some very badly scribbled Japanese characters - a mix of katakana, hiragana, and kanji that reads グデたま仏

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 7

Logging on

An orange and white cat covers his face with his paws and grimaces. His arms are a little blurry.

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 7

Not so fast, coward. Y’all really need to grow a thicker skin when it comes to hearing how wrong you are if you’re gonna show your ass on the internet. I personally love Pepperidge Farm

Sue Carr
@scarr54.bsky.social
I don't believe this women who says Platner raped her. Why didn't she report it? Why did she wait until the election to come forward? Why do people now automatically believe the woman over the man? Trump got away with raping little girls & woman. 25 women stood up & said he abused & or raped them.
6:09 AM • Jul 7, 2026

Punished Cat Guy (aka Johnny Bag o’ Snails)@majima· Jul 7

This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.