Jake Adelstein
@tokyovice
Investigative journalist in Japan, paladin, priest, 禅僧, drinker of coffee and donut consumer. One good deed a day is my low-bar motto. 一日一善 Follow me on substack
There is no Trump Derangement Syndrome. There’s just Trump. Who has dementia, is deranged, destructive and dysfunctional. TDS is real, though. Trump Denial Syndrome: a chronic inability to admit you blindly followed a pedophile, a con man, a criminal and a traitor.
NEWS FROM THE PAS Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg declares war on Hitler: “He betrayed us all.” July 20th 1944 😏
The stages of Republican death explained: Lindsey Graham is dead. Mitch McConnell is The Walking Dead. Donald Trump is brain dead. The Republican Party’s regard for the constitution and rule of law is dead and buried. 🪦
Just got off a 20-minute call with Lindsey Graham and Scott Jennings. Mitch McConnell’s doing great—playing beach volleyball with Charlie Kirk while they wait for Trump. Lindsey says it’s hot as hell, but his Little Mermaid sippy cup of lemonade is keeping him going. Nothing to see here. #cnn
When will liberal riders in Hollywood stop destroying history? How dare they make James Bond Japanese? We all know he was a British national on her Majesty Secret Service. I fear that Amazon is going to remake the series with a Scottish person or an Irish person playing Bond— just to be inclusive😏
For those dudes upset with Christopher Nolan's casting...I’d like you to meet Sean Connery as a Japanese fisherman in 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒐𝒏𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒘𝒊𝒄𝒆 (1967)
It has been a great day for the Islamic Republic of Japan. We now have rockets, not just missiles.
The hardest thing about living in the Islamic Republic of Japan is finding a really good beef kosher hot dog. It’s also very hot And despite firing missiles at the United States last week, Ayatollah Takaichi loves Donald and his country. We stand with Trumpistan
There are so many Japanese coffee blends to choose from. However, I believe the Brazil Blend (middle) stands out as the clear winner. It offers a lively, multi-ethnic robust taste that is definitely worth the extra yen. Cheers to that! 🇧🇷 🖖
This is a strange request I am working on a documentary about vanishing people In #Japan. Do you know anyone or have you ever vanished and then come back? What happens when you disappear and then reappear? DM me if you’re interested about talking about it on camera. 🖖
They say that those who don't remember history are doomed to repeat it. But know this: those who erase history are planning to repeat it, and this time they plan to win at all costs If you don't see the writing on the wall, be prepared for the blood on the ground Don’t let Jan 6 happen again
Wow. Nobody is ready for the Emily in Paris finale Emily gets expelled from France for working without a visa. She flies home on an expired passport. ICE detains her in a converted gymnasium. She mysteriously dies there. Nobody is held accountable Dionne Warwick was right all along Fade to black…
この表彰状は読売新聞社会部長賞。旧五菱会系ヤミ金融事件とマネーロンダリングを一年かけて取材した成果です。当時の社会部長・五阿弥宏安氏は鋭い医療ジャーナリストでした。でも上司の中で一番好きだったのは清武英利さん。今も交流が続いており、最近彼の著書『記者は天国に行けない』にも登場させていただきました。
Buddhist hall, 1000 years old, turns into blazing Buddhist hell. The eternal flame burnt it all down. Nothing lasts forever. That's Buddhism 101. #thefiresermon #eternalflame
The police have a very detailed database of organized crime members, and since they are semi public organizations, there are also used to be yakuza fan magazines. If you show up in a yakuza fan magazine at a yakuza meeting, there is a good chance that you are going to be identified.
Man, I am so glad that for once I was proactive and got my #passport renewed early. Because in a couple months, with the new passport, if I went to France, I might have to to deal with customs officials asking me: "Sir, why is there a picture of a vagina on this document?"
“The President makes decisions The press secretary announces them, they type🧑🏻💻👩🏽💻 Make, announce, type Just put 'em through a spell check and go home Write that novel You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the administration. You know – fiction!” #WHCD
In Japan, crime has a new look: senior citizens are making up a larger chunk of the criminal population than ever. Prisons looking like nursing homes might be one of our most unfortunate economic indicators yet. open.substack.com/pub/tokyopal...
Japanese neighborhood life. My neighbor smokes like crazy on the weekends. Jessy is allergic. He doesn’t seem to heed our request to maybe close the window or smoke somewhere else. So I resorted to taking a solar-powered fan and putting it in the front yard, which blows the smoke back Peace now
On a lighter note, at the book fair, in Lyon someone who had read Tokyo Vice and The Last Yakuza, glanced at Tokyo Noir (Tokyo Detective), and walked away My heart sank a little But she came back: “I must have this book!” Seeing someone complete the trilogy made me so happy Thank you, Camille. 🙏
Ride the Saikyo Line at 8am and then tell me Japan is the definition of discipline.
The metaverse was actually a hyper-realistic portrayal of reality. In that universe, Mark Cuckerberg has no legs and no balls. After watching him and other cowardly billionaires bow down to the πrump administration and suck up at the inauguration, you have to admit it’s very much on point.
Dr. Frankenstein says, "Sure, I made the monster, but I never thought he'd turn on me."
There’s an old Japanese saying: 笑う門には福来る (warau kado ni wa fuku kitaru)—good fortune comes to the gates of those who laugh. But when this man laughs, it’s never from joy. He laughs at other people’s suffering. Everything he touches rots. If evil ever walked the earth, it would borrow his necktie
When permanent residency becomes something that can be suddenly revoked you wonder: what does permanence mean? 🙇🏻♂️ It’s like a Zen Koan that can’t be solved. The answer may be… Don’t move to Japan?🇯🇵
Today is 3/11, marking the 15th anniversary of the earthquake that led to nuclear meltdowns at the TEPCO-operated Fukushima Daiichi plant. This January, TEPCO restarted their plant closest to Tokyo. We talk about why that's a disaster waiting to happen. tokyopaladin.substack.com/p/japans-nuc...
Timothée Chalamet under fire after dismissing Noh as an inferior form of Japanese theater, praising Kabuki instead. He went further, claiming Zeami’s Zen-tinged ideas about non-duality were flawed—a remark that has left critics and traditional theater lovers clutching their fans in horror 😏🤦🏻♂️🥷
On the eve of a Zen retreat with close friends Shoko and Reylia, we are on journey to a temple in Yamagata for stillness, silence, sore knees and a brief escape from the web. Amy will mind the Substack. May we all find a little peace—online or off. I’ll be offline until further notice. 🖖