B J. Witkin

@itsjustbeej

The guy with the one letter name. #uglydogs

704 Folgt2.440 Follower14.393 Posts

Instagram Instagram Bluesky

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B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 17d

A human skeleton with a live cat on its lap. The caption reads, “When your pet falls asleep on u and u don't want to wake it so u just sit there until you die of natural causes”

A statue of Jesus with a live cat on its lap. The caption reads, “This is why Jesus hasn't returned... he can't move til the cat wakes up”

A white coffee mug with a drawing of a mischievous cat and the caption, “Once I get this cat off my lap it's over for you bitches”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 17d

I didn’t know that you’re a fan, though I probably should have assumed so. Two friends are volunteers at Carolina Tiger Rescue. I can get you so many photos and videos!

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 17d

*record scratch* Morgan Freeman’s voice: they were, in fact, looking to pull a fast one on the court.

A screen shot of a paragraph in the article:

“Buckley says the government was aware of Gonzales. But it was unaware of that aspect of Gonzales. This was an
"inadvertent error," he insists. "Nobody was looking to pull a
fast one on the court."”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 17d

Ugggghhhh. You need a cat (read the alt text 😷).

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 19d

He literally just said they’re depleted, then when asked if they’re depleted said they aren’t

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 19d

I am reminded of this pillow I’ve considered buying:

A pillow with a periodic table of punctuation

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 20d

I think this would be a good Discworld Quote of the Day

It makes you wonder if there is anything to astrology after all."
"Oh, there is," said Susan. "Delusion, wishful thinking, and gullibility."
"Don't you ever let go?"
"I haven't yet."
"Why?"
"I suppose ... because in this world, after everyone panics, there's always got to be someone to tip the wee out of the shoe."

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 20d

I worked from the conference room in the cat cafe recently. I thought you might like my view:

A half dozen cats lounging on and around a windowsill. Two black cats are lying back to back in a bed too small for them. Two others are lying in cat-sized chairs. Two more are on the windowsill looking out on whatever is going on

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 21d

Did he have to report to his accountability partner—his son—that he said “shit”?

A news report from the NOTUS News service:

From the Hill
Mike Johnson's doom loop: After months of dealing with rebellions from members of his own party, the normally even-keeled speaker of the House had finally had enough and snapped, "I'm sick of this shit," at Rep. Anna Paulina Luna (R-Florida).

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 23d

How can I be expected to work like this

The same brown tabby cat lying in the half collapsed box, but now she’s lying on her back with her front paws tucked

The whole thing is adorable

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· 23d

It is very difficult to work under these conditions

A brown tabby cat lies on its side in a half collapsed box. The cat is staring longingly at the camera, aka me

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 15

Third-most corrupt organization in the world asked to investigate second-most corrupt organization in the world

News headline: “IOC asked to investigate FIFA president's role in Balogun reversal”

With a photo of the World Cup referee presenting the red card to Balogun

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 12

Related (and also evergreen):

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 12

Hope you’re doing well! Here’s one of ours snuggling with the kid in her blanket-robe

A young woman sitting on the floor, bundled up in a slanket. She’s holding a tabico cat in her arms. The woman is looking adoringly at the cat. The cat looks like it wants to not be there.

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 12

I haven’t seen anyone else post it so…

The Grim Reaper at the claw machine game meme. The caption reads, “LINDSAY GRAHAM?

IS TRUMP EVEN IN THIS
THING?”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 12

Do you want a bonded pair of black and white kittens? Of course you do! These adorable kittens are available for adoption from Beautiful Together Animal Sanctuary in Chapel Hill, NC.

Two black and white kittens in an adorable Instagram post from Beautiful Together Animal Sanctuary. The caption reads, “Two bonded boys!!
Good with other cats, dogs and with people!
Come meet them at
beautifultogethersanctua
ry"

The kittens are snuggling. One has its front leg thrown over the shoulder of the other. Both are looking at the camera, and the one in front has its tongue just barely sticking out

Two black and white kittens snuggling adorably in an Instagram post from Beautiful Together Animal Sanctuary. The caption reads, “Come meet Figaro and Pinocchio!
beautifultogethersanctua
r”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 7

A T-shirt that reads, “BEING A FUNCTIONAL ADULT
EVERY DAY SEEMS A BIT EXCESSIVE”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 7

And also, this one from @thisone0verhere.bsky.social

A convo between @thisoneoverhere and someone else about deciding what to eat

Another convo about deciding on dinner:

max_alley 11m
Eat your vegetables! Eat them! Slashes carrot tops in the air. Now thank me!

thisoneOverhere • 10m
Please fill out the application form on the portal first

max_alley 4m
Doms don't fill out applications.
...
thisoneOverhere • now
See folks, this is how you ace an interview

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 6

This reminds me of a few of my favorite memes

A human skeleton with a real cat on its lap. The caption reads, “When your pet falls asleep on u and u don't want to wake it so u just sit there until you die of natural causes”

A statue of Jesus with a cat on its lap. The caption reads, “This is why Jesus hasn't returned... he can't move til the cat wakes up”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 6

Hot take: even Infantino can tell this one stinks to high heaven and doesn’t want his fingerprints anywhere near it.

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 6

Forgive me but it’s giving me this

Pennywise the clown from It giving the lazy eye look

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 3

Meet Chairman meow, Officer squeak, and Commander fluff. All are available for adoption from Beautiful Together Animal Sanctuary in Chapel Hill, NC.

Three grey kittens are curled up together asleep in a kennel. They are adorable.

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jul 2

A photo of a dachshund tucked into a bed with the text, “WENT OUTSIDE TODAY
VERY PEOPLEY
0/10 WOULD NOT RECOMMEND”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 23

Buying myself this hat

A black hat that has the text, “I CRY A LOT”

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 23

I love everything about this photo. And the lovely dog reminded me that we had a gorgeous poodle (doodle?) in our rescue program over the weekend. He got adopted yesterday! Woman in the second photo is my daughter. She’s working at the sanctuary this summer.

A white standard poodle (maybe a doodle) lying on a couch waiting for his adopter to arrive

A white standard poodle (doodle?) licking the face of a young blonde woman. The woman is making a face as if she’s not enjoying this (she is)

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 23

They just released their first album to great acclaim. (See reply below for more info about these kittens)

Three grey kittens—Russian Blue?—staring out from behind the bars of a crate. Each kitten has a different expression on its face. The photo gives the impression of being a folk rock album cover

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 22

Two of my cats looking their absolute most majestic

A grey cat lying on its side, seductively, in a beam of sunlight

A tricolor tabico looking directly at the camera and looking gorgeous

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 18

post the best picture you have ever taken of your pet. look I have a dog, 3 cats, and I’ve been doing cat and dog rescue for 25+ years. I’ve got too many even with the 10 photo limit but here goes

A young blonde woman lying with her head resting on a gorgeous grey cat

A brown tabico cat lying on a pile of clothing, clearly claiming it as her own

A brown tabby cat lying in a box with a fake Christmas tree. Only the cat’s head and one shoulder stick out. The cat is staring at the camera, clearly pleased with herself

A tricolor hound sleeping on a couch. A grey cat is sleeping with its butt up against the dog's head.

B J. Witkin@itsjustbeej· Jun 15

“Somebody get me a Sharpie!”