Abdullahi Mohamed

@abdulmohamedwrites

A joke who makes jokes, a writer who writes things & a very tired cricket fan. There will be Brooklyn 99 memes. For enquiries, email abdullahimohamed2002@yahoo.com

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Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· 23d

Tfw your favourite team lost

Two of the most scumest men on planet earth, Gianni Infantino & Donald Jackass Trump at the Fifa World Cup final

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jun 26

Which "Fergie" is it? Is it the one from the Black Eyed Peas? Or is it the nickname of Sarah Ferguson? Please end my confusion @theipaper.com

The i paper: Epstein files: Fergie met Epstein twice while he was serving prison sentence for child sex offence

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jun 14

It's 9 years today since 72 people died needlessly in the Grenfell tower fire. And yet, the entire community is still waiting for justice for what was done to them. Despite numerous inquiries, we're yet to see any accountability. Be surprising if there was by next year. #justice4grenfell 💚

My sign saying
'9 years. Still no justice for Grenfell. Never forget
14 June 2017 💚 14 June 2026'

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jun 10

Wrote this out of anger. Also to the media outlets broadcasting incitement to violence, look at Belfast & wonder whether you're *really* doing this for "balanced journalism"

To every single person, politican, technocratic billionaire, commentator, "activist" etc who whipped up violent race riots & pogroms in Belfast, congratulations. You all helped bring about fear & terror onto communities. Families can't go outside without being ensured that they're gonna be safe, people of colour are being attacked *in their own homes* despite having no connection to the attack, and several homes & vehicles are being set alight. Nothing about this will get better. And it's all because of you. I hope you're happy. I hope you don't have to go through what you made them go through. But most importantly, I hope you go fuck yourself.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jun 5

Kanya King & Anthony Head both dying in the same week. So sad, yet so soon. Generational icons through & throughs. May they both rest in peace.🌹💛

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 30

They have a warm-up show? And the Killers are performing? Okay... #UCLFinal

Brandon Flowers from the Killers performing at Budapest stadium, where the Champions League final is happening

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 30

Came across this in Brighton the other day, thought I'd share it x

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 24

Zara Larsson last night & Olivia Dean tonight just instantly slaying it whilst headlining Radio 1's Big Weekend in Sunderland. Here's when I was very lucky to meet the both of them. 👑 #BigWeekend #R1BW

A photo with Zara Larsson at her album signing for Venus, 2024.

A photo with Olivia Dean at her album signing for Messy, 2023.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 12

Is it the first minister of Wales? First minister of Scotland? First minister of Northern Ireland? Which first minister is it?

LBC website:
LIVE: First minister quits as more than 70 Labour MPs sign letter telling Starmer to resign as PM.
Labour lost more than 1,400 seats, more than half of those it was defending in the local elections.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 11

Here is that said moment #baftas

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· May 7

This is your annual "hippos at polling stations" reminder that polls are open till 10 tonight for another important election. Swipe to see who you should vote against. 🦛🗳 #elections2026 #democracy #hopenothate #votegreen #hipposatpollingstations

My toy hippo sat outside a polling station.

Nigel Farage & his good old friend Donald Trump have a photo together, presumably laughing in our faces. Vote Reform, you deserve this.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Apr 19

My thoughts on the CNN report about *that website* & our responsibility as men to speak out about misogyny, male violence & patriarchy.

62 million views in February. 81 million views in March. That's how many times the "rape academy" website has been clicked.
My fellow men, what the fuck are we doing?
Are we literally seeing a fucking site aimed at raping, penetrating, dehumanising women? In this. 2026?
Just like the holocaust, what starts with words & "banter" ends up becoming something much more darker.
We can't simply say "not all men" & fucking do nothing. We have to stand against this shit & demand better. Otherwise we might as well continue being the reason why women choose the bear.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Mar 20

I made another pair of skittles celebrating thee Greg James to mark his latest challenge for Comic Relief. He's been cycling on a tandem bike, 1000km, from Weymouth to Edinburgh (greatest city in the world) & that's what i call committment. A great cause by a great man. bbc.co.uk/greg to donate 🚴‍♀️💪🏾

A selfie with Greg James & his book "All the best for the future "

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Mar 9

Here's how to know that America & Israel's war on Iran is illegal: Tony Blair supports it.

The Mail on Sunday: Now Blair delivers a stinging blow to PM over war. Ex Premier's rebuke to flailing Starmer: You should have backed US from day one

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 28

One opposes the two child benefit cap. The other supports it. One supports nationalisation of public services. The other opposes it. One supports human rights worldwide. The other opposes it. One opposes war crimes & fascism. The other supports it. And so on. But yeah, they have "more in common"

BBC News:
[Zack] Polanski and [Nigel] Farage don't agree. But they have more in common than you might think. Despite huge political differences, the Green and Reform leaders have much in common, writes Laura Kuenssberg.
BBC InDepth

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 27

Didn't know that the green party were cannibals, cheers @news.sky.com

Sky News:
'Cannibalised by the Greens': Watch Sam Coates explain why the Gorton and Denton by-election result is so bad for Labour

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 22

Paddington is hosting a Bafta film nomination? Please tell me that's Ben Whishaw in the costume x

Paddington bear handing out a Bafta film nomination

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 19

"Do prison cells come with a pizza express? Or are they just in Woking or summat?"

Former prince Andrew Mountbatten Windsor seen in a taxi for the first time since being arrested today

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 19

Maryam Moshiri reporting from Buckingham Palace on former prince Andrew's arrest, whilst a group of women dance in the background

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 19

Wowee

The Guardian:
Andrew Mountbatten Windsor arrested on suspicion of misconduct in public office

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 17

"If you fall behind, run faster. Never give up, never surrender, and rise up against the odds." The reverend Jesse Jackson Rest in power to a monumental great 🙏🏾

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 14

Went to the screening of 'the voice of hind rajab' last night & was so moved. It's a film about the 5-year-old palestinian girl shot dead in 2024 by the israeli army throughout its genocide in gaza. Kaouther ben hania, who made the film, was doing q&a afterwards. This is art.🇵🇸✊🏾 #thevoiceofhindrajab

The Voice of Hind Rajab
A film by Academy Award nominated writer director Kaouther Ben Hania
Made in collaboration with the Palestine Red Crescent Society
Visit palestinercs.org/en to make a donation
In cinemas January 16

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 11

Let's take a look at the news and... OOOOHHHH. 🫠

Two Guardian sport breaking news alerts:
(10:07am) Thomas Frank sacked by Tottenham after eight months as head coach
(10:02am) Revealed: Tottenham paid £6.7m to bring Thomas Frank and his team from Brentford

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 8

Shot ➡️ chaser (headlines via @theguardian.com)

The Guardian from 4 February 2026:
'It's an absolute bloodbath': Washington Post lays off hundreds of workers. Former Post executive editor blasts owner Jeff Bezos' 'sickening efforts to curry favor' with Trump

The Guardian from 7 February 2026:
Washington Post publisher Will Lewis abruptly resigns amid criticism of staff cuts. Departure comes days after newspaper laid off nearly one-third of staff, including more than 300 journalists

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 7

This is real . Really Real. SO FUCKING REAL 🫠

From the Times magazine on 7 February 2026:
"I've had a lot of bad luck, no doubt some of it my own making": Peter Mandelson, from ambassador's residence to Wiltshire domesticity. Written by Katy Balls

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 5

The other night, i turned my sandwich into a burger . I must be good at something , 🍔 #burgers #sandwiches #magic

...which i successfully made into a burger

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Feb 1

BBC News is suggesting that Donald Jackass Trump hasn't been accused of *any crimes* by any of Jeffrey Epstein's victims. It's as if the bath is based in the kitchen nowadays

Exercpt from BBC News online:
Trump has consistently denied any wrongdoing in relation to Epstein and has not been accused of any crimes by Epstein's victims.

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jan 30

There's plenty much to be said about thee one, thee only Catherine O'Hara. If it wasn't for her excellent performance in Schitt's Creek, would that show be the institution it is today? Unbearable news about her today. May she rest peacefully. 🌹🧡

Catherine O'Hara as Moira Rose in Schitt's Creek

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jan 25

Another reminder that ICE isn't just an American problem. Here in Britain, politicians like Nigel Farage wanna prop up the forces EXACTLY like ICE. Very important to know who he is & who Reform are. Headline by @scotnational.bsky.social #AbolishICE

The National headline: EXCLUSIVE - Alarm over Nigel Farage's ICE inspiration after Minneapolis shooting
From 8th January

Abdullahi Mohamed@abdulmohamedwrites· Jan 20

Ironically today marks a year since Donald Jackass Trump returned to the White House to fuck basically everything up, but also it's 5 years since Bernie Sanders unintentionally delivered this iconic moment at Joe Biden's inauguration