the lehr witch project

@amandalehr

Skeleton with some meat on it. The Audacity, The New Yorker, McSweeney’s, Electric Lit, Bright Wall/Dark Room, The Novelizers, a box to be opened in the event of my death. IG: amandamlehr

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Bluesky

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the lehr witch project@amandalehr· 17d

they only sell monocles?

Blue awning for “ODYSSEY OPTICAL.” No one is in the picture.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· 18d

CVS added a Signs and Symbols of National Decline aisle

Monopoly expansion pack box: “Go to Jail: Turns out, crimes does pay.” (“Makes the game faster!”)

Box of multicolored rubber chickens dressed like the Statue of Liberty. Their mouths are open in silent screams (and creepily reminiscent of blow-up dolls). The box says “Squeeze Me Statue of Liberty Chicken — Squeeze Me to Hear Me Scream!”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· 20d

circe:

“Legit question for rural Aeaeans — How do I kill the 30-50 feral hogs that run into my yard after drinking all my goddamned wine?

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· 23d

THE FURIOUS (2026)

Doctored screenshot of tweet from @HelloCullen : “Me and my friends would’ve killed child traffickers with hammers I can tell you that much.” (“Child traffickers” has been lazily cut and pasted over “ET”)

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· 29d

still thinking about his existential burden

Mopple from the Sheep Detectives — a white ram with a placid expression

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Jul 10

craving a sitdown with the mind who decided that Scrappy the Compost Creature should have barklike front claws and sexy women’s legs in heels

Bus ad with Scrappy — a being with a compost bin for a head, orange glasses, full brows, a coy smile, and the aforementioned appendages — reclining seductively between two piles of fallen leaves.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Jul 2

now, hang on. You yell “shark,” we’ve got a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.

Screenshot of text notification: “Notify NYC: Due to multiple shark sightings, expect intermittent closures at Rockaway Beach. Follow guidance of lifeguard and on-site staff.”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Jun 17

no one: Guy Ritchie character:

Screengrab of Carter (Noah Wyle) in ER, subtitled “that Dr. Benton let me bovie those bleeders”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 30

mine is the great eared nightjar, which looks like a muppet designed by Hieronymus Bosch

Brown and tan ugly-cute nightmare bird with bulging pure black eyes perching on a branch in utter darkness.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 27

when i carry all the groceries in one trip

Photo of board book in a red Little Free Library — “Brave Little Tugboat” with an anthropomorphic boat on the cover.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 12

Screencaps from the Fassbender/Wasikowska Jane Eyre — the “Do you think me handsome?” / “No, sir” exchange, but “handsome” has been replaced with “caked up”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Apr 17

“supernarcolepsy is no joke” **downs his 16th iced coffee of the day**

Dr. Shen from THE PITT drinking his omnipresent cup of Dunkin.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Apr 5

it’s her day

Marcie from PEANUTS stands on a chair and studiously cracks eggs into a waffle iron.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Mar 5

i’ve seen countless three-hour operas and also MARTY SUPREME guess which one had me checking my watch

Chalamet’s little bitchass face with quote: “i don’t want to be working in ballet or opera where it’s like ‘let’s keep this thing alive, even though no one cares about this anymore’ — all respect to the ballet and opera people out there.”

Post by Kelsey Abernathy: “i stand forever by my belief that this is a medieval mouse who begged a witch to turn him into a real boy and has spent centuries in an enchanted rodent-turned-boy body, unable to die”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Mar 5

NYC locals: I’m running a reading group on Beauty, Horror, and the Gothic Tradition at the Center for Fiction this spring! Sign up online and bring your uncanny doppelgänger. (Missing out is guaranteed to induce envy and spike your cortisol.) centerforfiction.org/group-worksh...

4/4 to 6/6. Skin Deep: Beauty, Horror, and the Gothic Tradition. Texts include CARMILLA (LeFanu), PERFUME (Süskind), NATURAL BEAUTY (Ling Ling Huang), stories by Hawthorne, Poe, & Shelley.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Mar 5

not seeing enough chat about PILLION and definitely not enough about how funny it is to make your sub read Knausgard with you

Skarsgard reclines on a leather couch in a sleeveless white tee and slutty little glasses, clutching vol. 5 of MY STRUGGLE

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Feb 23

me, the local bodega guy, and a lady walking her two corgis exchanging pleasantries in the street this AM

Screencaps of Boromir and Aragorn shouting into the whistling wind as they carry Merry and Pippin through the snow.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Feb 17

exquisite moment from the Franklin Expedition letters, James Reid to wife, Ann: “You mention that your old Gray Hare wase not worth the sending to me. I cane only tell you that your old gray Hare is as good to me as ever, and I would [have] been very Happy if you hade inclosed one Locke of it.”

Book page held open: text not included above reads: “James Reid to Ann Reid [Wife], 3 June 1845. Stromness:

Loving Wife,

I received hours of the 29 & 30 — happy to here [sic] that you and my Dear young ones is well as this leaves me the same, we are now under way. The Steam Boats is to tow both Ships clear of the Land.”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Feb 15

nostalgic shoutout to the most romantic movie of all time www.pointsincase.com/articles/of-...

Mmmfff. That’s the sizzle! That’s the sauce, babe. That’s MARGIN CALL.

I don’t understand what your problem is here! This cast is a murderer’s row of panty-droppers. Tucci. Badgely. Bettany. Aasif Fucking Mandvi. That smug guy from THE MENTALIST. You know, the one who looks like an expensive lion?

Simon Baker! Thank you.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Dec 25

he just wants to come home from work, put on his pjs, turn off the big light, and eat girl dinner he’s just like me fr

Michael Caine as Scrooge in Muppet Christmas Carol: he sits in a dark room wearing a cap and dressing gown holding a plate of bread and cheese.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Dec 10

the sluttiest outfit a man can wear

Black and white still of David Farrar as Mr. Dean in BLACK NARCISSUS (1947). He’s wearing a short-sleeved button-up shirt open to the waist, the shortest of cuffed shorts, and holding a comical floppy hat with feathery tufts. He’s cradling a pipe in the other hand. He chose to wear this to a convent.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Nov 26

thank you for giving me this recovered memory from RAMONA THE PEST

“Why don’t you turn on the dawnzer?” Ramona asked, proud of her new word… “it give a lee light. We sing about it every morning in kindergarten.”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Sep 12

whenever someone walks by with a Great Dane, i feel compelled to watch it pass like this:

Black and white photo of the enormous SS President Grant Steamship gliding parallel to crowd of people watching with great interest. Seattle, 6/12/1926.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Aug 22

the broth thickens

Image of beloved red-headed can-stacking baby from Wikipedia page for autism. Boy is wearing a red sweatshirt and white sweatpants, facing away from the camera as he stacks cans almost to his own height. In the background, an open cabinet of cans is visible. A red circle has been drawn around a cluster of Campbell’s Soups.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Aug 5

not to brag, but the vet just diagnosed my son as “handsome, sweet, and dumb”

Handsome black cat sitting like a sphinx, but with his bubblegum-pink tongue tip poking out. His green eyes stare vacantly into space.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· Jul 22

how it feels to chase an episode of THE GILDED AGE with THE KNICK

Santa Monica Meme houses: on the left, a pink and purple Barbie Dream House-esque mansion, trimmed in white that makes it look even more like a plastic toy. On the right, a fortress of what resembles black adobe with few windows and an arced roof.

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 15

I took this exact picture on Sunday 💀

Copy of Stendhal’s THE RED AND THE BLACK in the “Literature Only” slot on
back of airplane seat

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 11

“he doesn’t look like a pope — he has too much hair”

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 9

just spent 5 min looking for a shirt i was already wearing

Tattooed Guy Pearce in MEMENTO holding open his blue button-up shirt and staring at his ink in perplexity

the lehr witch project@amandalehr· May 7

one from me on the OONN today: how giving your medical history can feel like becoming a museum exhibit drop-dead gorgeous artwork by @soladraws (find her on IG!) thanks as always to my co-editor @iangoldstein.bsky.social See it all here: outofnetworknetwork.substack.com/p/ladies-and...