Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson (@batmasterson) · DIRTY

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson

@batmasterson

A fountain pen-stained harpooner, if that's your idea of a good time. Made in Canada. Wanted by comics authorities. Had Matter. Busy now.

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Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 15

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (449/≆800)

Yuko Shimizu illustration of, well, it's kind of yin and yang, innit? Taijitu type thing. A naked male figure and a leather body-suited female figure curled around each other. They're sleeping on each other's knees, using their own hands as pillows.

I've honestly no memory of what project this is from. Matrix vibes, really. But in 2007? Maybe I dreamed it.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 14

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (448/≆800)

It's a red bloody Dalek whippin' his eyestalk 'round to say **DALEKS ARE INCAPABLE OF LOVE! FOOL! DO YOU NOT YET UNDERSTAND WHY WE ARE HERE? CAN YOU NOT SEE THE DALEK MASTERPLAN?**

Part of the Valentine collection from 2007, you see.

This was during the time when Doctor Who still slept in my mind. I remembered it. I could make jokes about it. I knew there was a new show on. I could get discs from Netflix to watch bits from the '80s I'd missed. The beast was turning in its sleep. But I did not yet have images in a folder labeled "Doctor Who".

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 13

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (447/≆800)

"Haley Campbell's Pa Eddie Campbell" — four-panel strip by "mister J."
https://www.hayleycampbell.com/about/
https://www.eddiecampbelldammit.com/about
https://eddiecampbell.blogspot.com/2006/11/eddie-campbells-pal-mr-j.html

Across this standard newspaper comic, cartoonish Eddie Campbell, be-glassed and thick-browed, stares at a computer monitor, working at a keyboard with his three-fingered hands. In the final panel, he is covered in stubble and webs, a spider dangling from his ear.

EDDIE THINKS:
I've mis-typed my own name, yet still found a link... to someone else who also mis-typed it.

...what if there's a whole bunch of people talking about me or reviewing my book that the made the same mistake?!

Campell...
Camphell...
Cambill...
Camp Hill...

CAPTION:
Hours Later

EDDIE THINKS:
How does Alan Moore ever get anything done?

I once embarrassed myself in front of Eddie Campbell in San Diego, owing to enthusiasm and ignorance. I'm sure he's forgotten it. He has a lovely smile.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 12

George Bluth, Sr. once again regrets the agents he has chosen to be instruments of his will. They seem imprecise.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 12

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (444-46/≆800)

DC Villain Valentines! Collect 'em all!

THERE IS NO LuTHOR
[image of animated series Lex Luthor in his groovy green and purple chunky armor with arms outstretched]
WITHOUT "U"

I find Luthor fascinating. I must not think on why.

Not a Catwoman! Not a Hoax! 70s DC animation fetish gear as you like it!

I'LL NEVER
[image of Hanna-Barbera supervillain Cheetah doing a kind of "Oh no! You got me!" dance move]
"CHEETAH" ON YOU

Cheetah has cat-like powers. And monkey-like ears. I can dig it.

What's important about the Bizarro concept is that it is hyperbolically orthogonal to our understanding.

[image of classic Bizarro No. 1 in Jesus Christ Pose, smiling]
ME
TAKE
YOU(R)
SPLEEN!

This is love.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 11

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (443/≆800)

You asked for it! DC sent it back in time to 1963! SUPERBOY'S SECRET INVISIBLE WICKED+DIVINE ORIGIN!

This is Card 19 of the Curt Swan Tarot, where he has linked iconography of the Chariot to the Moon's landscape. In both Arcana there are normally two animal figures, but Swan suggests that in the light of the inner eye's truth there is simply the appearance of two natures that can be represented by one complicated, uh, thing.

Look, the full moon's there in the night sky, there's a pyramid on either side (one light, one dark), there's a face out of place (in this case it's Superboy's face on a lion in a "Donna Saved in the Library" way), there's clouds and chisel marks that suggest water and insects... my brain just does this, okay?

Read the true sacred mystery here: https://www.progressiveruin.com/2007/02/10/superboy-sphinx-is-watching/

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 10

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (442/≆800)

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 9

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (440-41/≆800)

Go ask https://www.progressiveruin.com/2007/02/03/youd-think-dino-would-know/

It's a panel from a Flintstones comic. Dino, ostensibly a dinosaur (albeit an unfeathered blue one with a navel, who can think in human language and is kept as a collared pet), stands with his arms akimbo. Frustration grips his rubberized maw as he thinks "HE DOESN'T KNOW I'M A FULL GROWN TYRANOSAURUS (sic) REX!"

Dino's next thought bubble contains the mental image he has of himself as an Emperor King Lizard. It's a panel-in-panel gag. The game here is that someone handsome, wise, and all-suffering has erased the image from the original story, allowing you to draw in your own. Have at!

Don't blame me, I voted for https://www.progressiveruin.com/2007/02/03/youd-think-dino-would-know/

In this version, Dino's mental image of himself as a Tyrannosaurus Rex is Buddy Cole on a barstool using a slur that he could use on international television back then. Buddy Cole is played by Canadian Scott Thompson, star of 1989's MILLENNIUM.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 8

I think I'm going to be sick.

Edith's photograph of the Sensitive Criminals cell, circa 1924. Gideon in his sunglasses. Phil Jimenez art.

Whittier kids in Penn Park, circa 1998. I'm a ghost.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 8

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (439/≆800)

And once again, we return to this.

It's a low-res cropped in scan of most of the cover on Invisibles Vol.2 #10 ䷉ 履 lǚ with Edith and Gideon's ghost MORRISON•JIMENEZ•STOKES and using the future tools I can see the cover date might have been November 1997 DNALLOB the spider dripping down the sheets Christ why can't I remember my own life? They have hookahs and she swears they will smoke until the walls turn yellow. No, that's not in this. That happened to me. Look at her. It was 1997. It was 1924. I remember feeling things intensely. Spider Queen of Time.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 7

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (438/≆800)

Of the many unfortunate deviations in the bifurcation of quantum foam solids that generated the past-time tube snake leading to this moment we experience, one of the most frustrating is DC Comics' publication of "JLA" (1997-2006) instead of this.

"LSD" by Grant Morrison and anyone other than Howard Porter, chronicling the greatest adventures of the most iconic line-up of the Love Syndicate of Dreamworld (here represented by Sunshine Superman, Speed Freak, and Magic Lantern) set the tone for superhero comics going into the new century. Bright, curiosity-seeking, novelty-loving readers became better human beings, wiser, more empathetic, less cruel, determined to live in ways that celebrated the web of existence. They went to more Wyld Stallyns concerts. They played squash in the courts of heaven. I can see them now, a thin ocean of probability away, living their changes endlessly.

Anyway, this is part of a panel from Animal Man #23 (䷖ 剝 Splitting Apart). Sunshine Superman is tall, with an afro and yellow wrestling pants. Speed Freak wears read and gold with the word ZOOM! written across her chest. Magic Lantern is in bell bottoms and a t-shirt that says "TURN _ON_
TUNE _IN_
DROP _OUT_"

I'm a believer.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 6

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (437/≆800)

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 5

Ivar the Boneless always feels like this.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 5

That's ridiculous. You look like me.

Blurry 2005 photo of yer man wearing red goggles and pointing a man-eating cow at the camera.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 5

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (436/≆800)

Not a hoax! Not a Phonogram! Something Chynna Clugston Flores drew for a thing and then it was in my email and then it was in the folder and now it's here!

This is Finnegan Bleu in color with various bits of British popular music iconography woven into the— hang on, Christ. This was January 2007, and I got... so she and Jon had *their* 20th wedding anniversary *last* year. From when I'm writing this. I should have sent a card. I'm terrible at people.

Straight Outta Deadwood.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 4

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (435/≆800)

In the midst of ALL-STAR SUPERMAN, and beating KLAUS by ten years, comes "Merry Christmas from Superman's brother, NO-EL" — a single panel of uncertain origin. Happy Fourth of July!

Someone took some time to Photoshop 8.0 yuletide-time colors and iconography onto a classic "ditching his loser co-workers at the day job" drawing of Superman. Here he rises, green, red, and white, clutching a non-dimensional candy cane, sporting a Ty Templeton-ish Santa hat, through a misty make-way-for-the-joke sky.

Human hands did this silly thing. That's worth fighting for.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 4

Spoiler from a copy I didn't even know I had until a few weeks ago:

The middle of some page toward the end of issue 463 of ACTION COMICS — Superman hilariously drops three 18th century dudes on their panel-breaking butts in front of >ULP!< GENERAL GEORGE WASHINGTON!

As he continues his flight, Superman shows an at best naive grasp of civics and history as he thinks: THE FATHER OF OUR COUNTRY WILL KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THAT TRIO OF TORY SPIES!

No matter! He's got a wind-resistant scroll to deliver!

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 3

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (434/≆800)

William Stout's "LOOK AT THIS FUCKING MONKEY" (2003)

A ragged beast of a black and white line drawing, it's got vibes of pulp fantasy illustration running up the bones of a minor character from a beloved children's book. If Conan went to Oz, he would fight this guy.

In one way, he's the old monarch of the Winged Monkeys leaping through an arched window in a stone wall, about to get into trouble with some human royalty. In another, he's Sun Wukong with his staff and crown and shape-changing powers about to get into trouble with the gods. In still another, he is simply King Kong, resurrected wrath of nature. Look out, he's got a knife!

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 3

Sounds like someone's never spent a sleepless night wrestling with the big questions...

"why your favorite 'pen'
just might be a
pencil"

Cover detail from Pen World - February 2013

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 2

It's a radio for speaking to God.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 2

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (433/≆800)

Eddie Campbell gently murders Alan Moore. RIP, Alan. You could have been one of the greats.

What we have here, Inspector, is a black and white photocopy of London's Tower Bridge under construction on the Thames. Some wag has added line drawings of a horse and carriage plummeting off one uncompleted bit of scaffolding into the airy expanse of doom. A word balloon cries out, "Wait, Netley, I've got a better ideaaghh----"

The artist's note reads: "Alan!! Tower Bridge was still being built in 1888 — We'll have to send them round the long way — Eddie."

The lesson in "From Hell" lore: It's important to have a partner. It's devastating to have one that's better than you.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 2

Without downloading any new pics, without hope, without witness, without reward, what’s it like being in a relationship with you:

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 1

Five minutes earlier

Reynard and Jack Frost climb up the outside wall of a skyscraper "to obscurely reduce this macrocapital sepulchre to fine talcum" or summat.

R: инН... МУ меме IS CYCLING: FIVE MINUTES OF POST - IRONIC DRIZZLE. I'M SELF-BLIND: I'M OSCILLATING BETWEEN WEIRD LONER AND TERRIFIED-DAUGHTER-OF-DRACULA TOO FAR UP A GLASS WALL IN THE RAIN.
J: STOP WATCHING THE OTHER WALLS, THEN. KEEP YOUR EYES ON MY ARSE.

Invisibles art by Frank Quitely. Invisibles words by Grant Morrison. Invisibles everywhere by мемеplex. Initiation never ends.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 1

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (431-2/≆800)

A caricature of Collette by the genius Eddie Campbell. It's a black and white wash ink thing that the French probably have a word for. What's the French for Scotsman? "Mon grand Écossias," she'd sigh. "There are only two kinds of men in this world, and you're him."

I mean, just going off the look he's put in her eyes.

Caricature of H.P. Lovecraft by the beglassed Eddie Campbell. An oddly proportioned chisel of a child in a dark suit with a wild-eyed boutonniere standing there in his color-free public domain. He's a mug shot waiting to happen.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jul 1

Either panel or both. Depends on how much you want to splash out.

I went to London for my 40th birthday just so I could quote this.

Hellblazer #63 - John's had a hard night drinking with gods and ghosts, so when Kit finds him in the morning all he can mumble is "M.., m' fordy, luv... M' n' old mannnn..."
Kit's reply: "You seen the state've this place, wee lad? You're a friggin' dead man."

The End
Words and such by Garth Ennis. Art by Steve Dillon.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jun 30

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (429-30/≆800)

I don't know why you'd have used this as your desktop wall paper in 2006, unless you were on a Mac and needed a Frank Miller drawing of a lady BLAM!ming your HD.

"FRANK MILLER'S A DAME TO KILL FOR SIN CITY® © 1993, 1994, 1995, 2005 Frank Miller, Inc All rights reserved," she sneered.

I gotta tell you, FRANK MILLER'S THE BIG FAT KILL SIN CITY®, despite being © 1994, 1995, 1996, 2005 Frank Miller, Inc. All rights reserved, is not my favorite. It's mostly dumb. So is this wallpaper version of the characters. I could tell you their names if I watched the movie again. Probably. Oof.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jun 29

In the Classics Illustrated version of Moby-Dick, Ahab raises a fist to the sky and cries "TALK NOT TO ME OF BLASPHEMY! I'D STRIKE THE SUN IF IT INSULTED ME!"

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jun 29

Next you'll be telling me this isn't a Sinestro.

Louis Calhern as Ambassador Trentino in "Duck Soup" along with some other guys.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jun 29

images from a folder labeled "comics" gathered 1999-2025 (427-8/≆800)

I don't mind visiting the Malian Gulf, I just get annoyed when every other belly dancer is like, "300™ and © 1998, 1999, 2005 Frank Miller, Inc. All rights reserved." If I wanted to hear that, I would've just stayed in Vermont.

This is a medium-sized DARKHORSE.COM downloadable desktop wallpaper from 2006 with colors by Lynn Varley. Depicted in Frank Miller's signature bold brush brushwork is a man with grotesquely mismatched testicles and a bizarre, thin penis exposing himself to the world.

Again with the "300™ and © 1998, 1999, 2005 Frank Miller, Inc. All rights reserved." Ladies, please, I am but a visitor to DARKHORSE.COM, here to view your most medium of wallpapers. I have no heart for spycraft.

Drawrn by Frank "The Tank" Miller ("El Filler") and colored by Lynn "The Win" Varley ("La Marley"), we have here an uncounted number of Spartan soldiers exposing their thighs and feet on La Cienega Boulevard around 1991.

The air quality in Los Angeles has much improved since then.

Bat "Mark Anthony" Masterson@batmasterson· Jun 29

"Nick of Time" is an episode of the The Twilight Zone.
From the CBS Video Library cover:

"Newlyweds Don and Pat Carter are en route to a New York honeymoon when their car breaks down in a small Ohio town. Waiting for repairs to be made, they grab lunch in a local diner. Don has always been superstitious—the rabbit’s foot and four-leaf-clover charm on his keychain bear witness—so it’s no surprise when he’s drawn to the penny fortune-telling machine on the table, complete with tiny devil’s-head bobbing atop it. Although the answers are maddeningly general, Don becomes increasingly convinced that the machine is predicting his future—and increasingly unwilling to leave. Only the future will tell, but it’s possible that neither he nor his wife will ever get out of town…or the Twilight Zone."