Melody 👿💥 (@bigtittygarfield) · DIRTY

Melody 👿💥

@bigtittygarfield

im 50. [ ze / zer / zerself ] my art on the archive.

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Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· 28d

charlie kirk statue with an unintentionally plain, pained face.

Robin Williams as the Bicentennial Man with an unintentionally plain, almost terrifying look.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· 28d

Jar Jar & Binks

the two white, pale, dreaded ghost dudes from the matrix.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 14

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh

Melody with a black bandana, short black quaff of a pompadour, cat eye glasses, a big happy, toofy smile, and light pink shiny dress with roses.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 13

i am never not thinking about this. keeps me humble.

post exchange.

user silenthooper: when the race war is happening and I gotta kill Tony Hawk (photo ID/ a Black man, tears streaming, holding a pointed gun)

user Tony Hawk: I appreciate the hesitation though.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 11

um....may I use this photo for my 4/20 godzilla marathon next year? this was one from a couple years ago :P

poster for a "Blazing Godzilla Marathon" with movie showtimes, and godzilla on the right smoking a huge blunt (a small pot leaf on the back of his head disguised as his spikes)

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 6

free-use DIY concert poster.

the goofy / roxanne dirtbag meme. goofy is saying "Damn, bitch this shit is live?" with a black box underneath with text: concert info attached.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 5

discussing Pride Airlines that flies around the world for mile-high hook-ups...

*cue steve winwood*

Bring me a higher club,
Bring me a wired pup,
Bring me a tiny chub,
it's that mile-club i keep thinking of
....think about it 🎵

okay, thanks for reading,i quit twitter.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 4

I most certainly went around saying "I am Mephistopholes, Prince of Darkness...obey me! Obey ME!!" perhaps one too many times

Jon Lovitz in a cheesy devil costume, looking at the camera saying "You, watching this at home; Worship me! I command you. Become my willing thralls and live eternally!

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 4

"hello, yes, i'm looking for the cunt who snatched my look"

HIM from the Powerpuff Girls, a very faggy devil type character with 'flair'

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 4

danced to EDM for the first time since having tits, dressed like slutty satan.

Melody dressed like a slutty satan, red horned head band, black bandana, st peter cross on forehead, scriggly horn like eyebrows, red lipstick making a heart shape with the lips with black lipstick for the sides, a red patterened fabric coat, tits looking devilishly delightful.

zer face is that of a menace.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jul 3

yus yus yus yus

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 30

who wants to makeout in the back seat of aunty's jeep?

melody with pink bandana, hair in a quaff, thin eyebrows split with a shaved edge, black lipstick, topless with a denim vest, and a very demure look of piqued interest.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 29

5-star review for The Stupids (1996)

it's literally called the stupids,

...just roll with it.

the worst part of the movie is when Stanley sings "I'm my own Grandpa"

The best part is when Stanley + Petunia meet Lloyd. Also, more women in big dresses and clunky heels should be filmed letting flame throwers rip.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 29

amongst rows of flowers, a bee stands out prominiently on a flower in the foreground. in the background, as blurry as the clouds, stands a castle.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 24

i'm literally 50

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 22

Content Notice: Fractured Psychosis "I Hate to be the Oracle who said 'I told you so' but..."

Dyschordia:

you're right.
you did die.
you splintered.
and you gave me a name.

a precious little trick,
hidden in your shadow.

your life couldn't be chaotic.
your brain couldn't handle
the natter-natter-natter
of the chatter-chatter-chatter
so you thought "why not?"
the whole world's gone bad
and you're one of the baddest, right?

Melody:

what if I'm not sure?

what if I failed finding a reason
to promise myself a tomorrow
other than conceited destruction?

what if I've lost my mind
and what if I believe you?

---

Harmony:

you're wrong.
you did survive.
you grafted the wounds
and pruned the pain
after calling it out
by a different name.
it was survival instinct,
hidden in your heart.

your life was chaotic.
your brain couldn't handle
the sounds of smashed glass,
the white clouds of death,
and the utter, defeating pain
of worthlessness.

it wasn't what you wanted; it's what you got.
and your world's better since ---

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 22

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 22

poster for National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1.

Emilio Estevez and Samuel Jackson are looking back at us over their shoulder while they are pointing a gun at a target practice chart of a person covering their face and genitals.

review for National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1:

in a genre of slapstick, whack-a-doo comedies, the original Naked Gun reigns supreme amongst them as the finest example of the genre.

for me, this film far exceeds it.

this film has a laugh a minute, and Estevez with Jackson made a fantastic duo to ground the silliness with their dramatic deliveries. the scene wherein Jackson's character has to shoot a gun has got to be, hands down, one of the most criminally underwatched scenes in comedy.

with a star studded cast, the film clips right along; gag after gag, flashback after flashback.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 19

imagine someone trying to hurt my feelings while passing me on a sidewalk* when i literally wake up like this now.

Melody bein' a fat, white, curvy bitch wearing a black bandana, shadowy makeup and black lipstick, fish nets over cutesy black underwear and tits popping out a black lacy bra, exposed from a sleeveless purple robe.

As ze leans on a dresser, one hand holding a camera to the mirror, other on the hip, ze's standing with one crossed leg en pointe, and a dark expression.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 19

Jim Carey as the Riddle from Batman Forever; short trimmed orange hair, green tuxedo mask, and green body suit covered in black question marks.

Elon Musk at a Nazi rally for trump, jumping in the air with his arms up in the arm. He has an anguished, pained expression...as if he realized in this moment the ignorant bliss of his existence shattered because of how much he looks like a dweeb and a rally full of dweebs.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 18

Photo ID/ A parody of the Dr Seuss book cover for "Oh, The Places You'll Go" edited to read "Oh. The Shit You'll Post"

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 18

TMNT banner: Old age impotence is closer.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 16

i have tittays, they're so prettays

a photo of a sheer black top showcasing zer fat tiddies underneath.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 13

you ever analize your internal storage and realize you're 69% used?

analyze storage.

internal storage
69% used.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 13

🫡

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 12

my review of The Starlost: The Beginning.

the first two episodes of the '80s canadian sci-fi television show edited as this stand-alone movie does not do this single season of an idiosynratic serial justice.

on its face, everything about this film is dismissable; the script, acting, effects, design; and yet, as a whole series, it gives a real peek into the identity of a country struggling to produce original, captivating television.

with themes akin to Battlestar Galactica and The Expanse, acting from 1920s sci-fi serials, and a visual spectacle smacking of Nordic and Russian television of the same period, The Starlost is a lost gem of imagined potential that leaves an impression of a canadian community theatre production; it wasn't great, and i really enjoyed it.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 11

impromptu picnic date with two smoking babes; reading to each other with ice tea and drags.

melody against a white background, wearing a pink sun hat, swooped black hair underneath, rose gold sunnies, a shiny white dress with flowers along the trim, a denim vest overtop. Ze is staring off into space, one hand resting on its shoulder.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 9

pink bumper sticker format.

text: Don't bother trying to bother me...I'm listening to Spoochy - Spoochy (1999)

image: on the right side is the Spoochy album cover featuring 3 young japanese women wearing flowers in their hair, the saturation gives a washed look.

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 6

heath ledger joker: you wanna know how i bonk'd head hard?

Melody 👿💥@bigtittygarfield· Jun 3

made a valentine's card for pride <3 creative commons license, no accreditation necessary.

horizontal stripe flag. the top and bottom are black lines with, fading into the center respectively, a sky blue / dusk blue, sky pink / burgundy, to a creamy white centre.

text down the center reads "of all the things / I think of as kink, / talking to you / is my favorite, I think!