worker bee

@bjmarquez

customer servant, bird feeder, tv watcher 📺 @bdfm.bsky.social

982 Following348 Followers747 Posts

Bluesky

Is this your profile?Claim it and bjmarquez.dirty.social is yours.Claim profile

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jul 3

gotta love AI results

Screenshot of a google search for “how many times does the camera.zoom.in on sam neill and then he says something”. (I was hoping for a supercut of JP3 Sam Neill moments).

The AI overview responds thus:

In the iconic original Jurassic Park (1993), the camera slowly zooms in and focuses on Sam Neill's face exactly once when he first sees the dinosaurs. After removing his sunglasses, pausing in awe, and taking a moment to process the sight, he says his famous line: "Welcome to Jurassic Park."

Screenshot of google results for my search “he would live for 10 minutes or 100 years boy he showed them”

The AI responded thus:

That is an absolutely classic line! You're quoting Jack Donaghy from the hit show 30 Rock, referring to his cousin Gerhardt, who was born with a massive list of extreme medical issues.
The exact quote is "When Gerhardt was born, the doctor told his mother and cousin that he would either live for 15 minutes or for 100 years.
Boy, he proved them all wrong."

The absurdity of his "medical condition"-portrayed as a frail, large-headed man living in a giant glass bubble in the family's mansion-is one of the most memorable running gags in the series.

Screenshot of google AI informing me that Liz Lemon forced her staff to call her “Queen Jordan”, and that she fired Floyd’s new girlfriend after they broke up

• Forcing Staff to Call Her "Queen Jordan": In her pursuit of power, she often acts as a petty tyrant, frequently described as the "villain" of the show in discussions of her character's worst traits.

• Firing Floyd's Girlfriend: She tried to fire her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend simply to create a breakup and have him back.

These lines and moments are usually framed within the context of 30 Rock's fast-paced, absurd humor, where characters are intentionally flawed, but they stand out as the most questionable actions taken by the character.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 26

re LRT:

An excerpt from Forbes’ report on this A.i. Study:

"The judgment gap revealed is not simply that women are judged more harshly in professional evaluation, a finding already well documented," said Chatoo. "It is that women who use Al are judged more harshly specifically for using it."

Evaluators were also 22% more likely to doubt the candidate's trustworthiness if the AI-assisted resume came from Emily rather than James. "When men use AI, we question their effort. When women use AI, we question their integrity," said Chatoo. "That difference changes the perceived risk of using AI.”

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 23

I made this meme for some reason and then thought it would be a great meme format until I realized the blank ones make an entirely different joke

Two Band-Aids from the film “Almost Famous” sit in a wood-paneled hotel room in the 1970s. There are candles lit behind the two women. They are wearing peasant-blouse hippie clothing and have long hair. The caption is a meme that’s been changed to read “Let’s radicalize the Senator”. We know, of course, having seen the movie, that they are actually saying “Let’s deflower the [Cameron Crowe character].”

A very slightly different version of the first blank Band-Aid meme. It occurs to me someone could see this as a joke about how the Cameron Crowe character is a minor.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 6

I watched this video of a Spencer Pratt supporter yelling at people through a megaphone and the slurs she was screaming seem to have caused an existential crisis for the AI captioner

Screenshot of a video posted to the Los Angeles subreddit. The title is “Threatened by a Spencer Pratt Supporter with a Megaphone” and the video depicts an angry person in a van, about to head into traffic, looking back at the person taking the video. The closed captions, instead of narrating the woman’s obscenity-laden rant, now read “…to me? What’s happening to me? What’s happening to me?”

A cropped screenshot of just the AI captions repeating “…happening to me? What’s happening to me? What’s happening to me? What’s happening—“

worker bee@bjmarquez· May 28

A still from the hit Lifetime doc “a dog took my face and gave me a better face to change the world: the Celeste Cunningham story”

worker bee@bjmarquez· May 23

worker bee@bjmarquez· Apr 21

This is when I fell for Max Muncy

Max Muncy stares after the home-run ball he just hit to end game 3 of the 2018 World Series. He has dropped the bat and he’s about to run, but first he’s having a millisecond of utter disbelief that this hellish time loop of 9 extra innings is finally going to end

worker bee@bjmarquez· Feb 25

the four phases of the cycle

four people sitting on barstools, all facing the camera over their shoulders. left to right they are: Alyson hannigan as willow dressed as vampire willow; 2 stunt performers both in costume as vamp willow dressed as human willow; and a third stunt double dressed in hannigan’s same leather vamp willow ensemble.

Layering the phases of the menstrual cycle over them, they would represent

(1) the menstrual phase (dressed sexy but looking exhausted)

(2-3) the follicular phase — ovulation (dressed normal but looking demonic)

(4) the luteal phase (wig on, bodice laced)

worker bee@bjmarquez· Feb 24

text thread shows a gif of a cat saying Muah. The image has set off apple’s sensitive photo detection, even though it’s just a cat

Text thread. A kid has texted the words “I just wanted to send this” and a gif of a cat which is captioned with an onomatopoeic kiss sound. Their grown up has replied “Haha omg. Oh nooo” in response to the cat gif triggering the sensitivity detectors

worker bee@bjmarquez· Feb 3

A beautiful young woman in an outdoor scene holds up a hand mirror that shows the reflection of an old man. It is a still from the Bergman film Wild Strawberries.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Dec 28

Needs to be a meme IMHO

a lovely mustachio’d person leaning into a reporter’s mic outside a screening of John Waters’ PINK FLAMINGOS and declaring “i think it’s the future of city living”

worker bee@bjmarquez· Dec 20

I was wondering if I could get the files to you on maybe Monday or Tuesday cause I’ve been very busy right now and our computer system is down

A screenshot of a headline that reads “U.S. justice department to release thousands of Epstein files later, top official says”, just as Corporate Lady How to Talk might say

worker bee@bjmarquez· Dec 2

This is so far the best one I’ve found. I was trying to find the actor who played Leo. It was Donelly Rhodes.

A very confused AI response about an episode of Cheers. The character Leo is asking for advice about his gay son. He’s also in no way played by Michael Richard’s

worker bee@bjmarquez· Nov 24

worker bee@bjmarquez· Nov 21

always add alt text

Screenshot of the alt text bot suggesting that I describe a gif from the Simpsons, featuring Smithers and Lenny, as “a cartoon of a man kissing another man while holding a can of oatmeal”, which is not what is happening in the gif

worker bee@bjmarquez· Nov 17

magnolia seeds for you

A magnolia seed-pod bursts with red seeds as it pokes up from a fan of glossy green leaves. Drops of rain shine on the leaves. The seeds are electric with color.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Nov 9

Adam Scott as Ben on Parks and Recreation, asking the very sad question “Do you think a depressed person could make this?” in reference to the weird special interest he’s using to cope with his obvious depression. He was also once a young mayor.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Oct 6

d’aww thank you! I really love this bamboo too

worker bee@bjmarquez· Oct 6

hi I appreciate you & commiserate with your loneliness, here is the queen cat who lives with me and also some pandas my kid drew in school

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 10

Spent yesterday driving through #LosAngeles. Did the same on Saturday and Sunday. Doing the same today. The city is functioning. We are here.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 7

my grandpa, pictured here having done his part (liberated a couple camps)

A photograph from the late 1970s or early 1980s that’s becoming sepia-toned with age depicts a middle-aged man of Mexican/Tsokanende heritage as he sips coffee from his favorite yellow mug. He’s wearing a white T-shirt with a thin blue stripe pattern and a fisherman’s-style hat. His pose, it must be said, reminds one of Kermit sipping his tea.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 6

here’s the first prank my elder child played on the young one

A four-panel of successive photos showing two little kids. One is a toddler of two and a half wearing a pink top with white polka dots, and the other is an infant of three months in a purple onesie. Both children have white skin with pink cheeks and honey-brown hair that’s almost reddish on the baby.
In the first picture, the toddler is smiling widely with an open mouth, probably screaming with laughter. She’s reaching out of frame, and the infant has a ridiculous expression of confusion.
In the next three pictures, we see one sibling’s first prank on the other: the toddler brings the bottle of milk she’s holding into view — and puts it up to her own face instead of the baby’s, grinning with glee. The infant has opened her mouth for the bottle — and nothing is there. The toddler laughs, pretends to drink the milk, and watches the baby realize, to her outrage, that something has gone wrong.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jun 1

jack stauber’s OPAL, a little girl with huge eyes and awful whisker-like Pippi pigtails that stick out much like the creepy fronds of the sea creature of the original post; shudder

worker bee@bjmarquez· May 20

I will always see the dodger stadium icon as a little Batman

worker bee@bjmarquez· May 10

Angel is an older [man] but a guilty one — a [man] who has to keep brooding over the consequences of every one of his past sins — a vamp so sad a Slayer can’t hurt him. He’s the glorified Exception to the Rule, the only guy who gets it.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Mar 10

Just dropped a food delivery off to a complex in highland park… & they’ve got a purslane groundcover going! 😻

worker bee@bjmarquez· Mar 8

It’s time again to read “Why I Quit the Klan”.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Mar 3

🌙 👀

A picture of the beautiful sunset colors reflecting off of wispy clouds, and a thin crescent of a moon

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jan 28

🧵 ☠️ 🪡 🧶 🪡 ☠️ 🧵

In the foreground, two knitting needles are crossed in an X. They’re circular needles, set down in mid-stitch. Forming off of the needles is a ribbed hat — still just a tube, though the whole structure isn’t in view — being knit in stripes of pink, purple, blue and black. In the background, the green leaves of two houseplants, a monstera and a rubber-tree plant, reach toward light.

worker bee@bjmarquez· Jan 21

NO ONE HAS A SEX AT CONCEPTION.