Mexican Pirate King

@christophicles

Equity. Inclusivity. Frivolity. Soccer is life, as is the refreshing, citrusy blast of Tang, a kick in a glass. Huzzah to geeky & nerdy things! There is very little meat in these gym mats. He/Him

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Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· 5d

It was with profound gratitude - and with great relish - that I tell you all… it’s a Hundough

Blanche - the stoic and artful leader of Team Mystic from Pokémon GO - communicates to me that my recently-caught Fidough, a delightful, culinary-crafted white-and-yellow confectionary canine creature, has perfect stats. Blanche’s long white and blue coat, with pink pokéballesque highlights, tells us she is someone who has seen much in this world, and the dark turtleneck underneath denotes that she handles business

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jul 7

And to tie a bow on this sweet soccer story, here are some pictures of my boy, then and now, forever a supporter of the diverse, connected, joyful version of US soccer

My son leading chants at the USWNT World Cup send-off game at PayPal Park a few years back

My son as a wee lad wearing Stars and Stripes pants my wife made him and a Chris Wondolowski Bomb Pop USA Jersey. He also has a red, white, and blue antenna headband on

My son, getting ready to start tailgating at the AO tailgate before the US-Bosnia & Herzegovina match. He is wearing a spectacular US Cowboy hat and glasses my wife got from Ross and the blue starsUS jersey

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jun 29

I am wearing one of my Dragonball Japan jerseys, one Hello Kitty sock, A Mario sock, and all of my Frieren bracelets trying to manifest this win for Japan!

Me at work in front of a dark brown set of wood cabinets. I wear a pleasant smile and my blue Dragonball Japan jersey that has dozens of vignettes from the seminal anime. My green staff lanyard adds a bit of extra panache

My blue Hello Kitty sock and my thumb, because why would I take a good picture lol

My Mario sock and a tad too much leg hair

My Fern and Frieren bracelets on my arm. I am also wearing Stark and Sein bracelets, but this website only lets you have 4 pictures so you will just have to use your imagination for those

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jun 15

That was a real humdinger of a match! And the pub we saw it at was great. The Elephant & Castle is an excellent place to catch some footy, as well as some tasty treats and brew!

The front of the Elephant & Castle Pub and Restaurant. It has a metal gating surrounding the the yellow lit up marquee. The door frame is red, mimicking the ubiquitous telephone booths London is known for. It has a revolving door entrance, which seems to be a them here in Chicago

A framed piece of art in the Elephant & Castle that has many recognizable English figures such as David Bowie, Sean Connery James Bond, and David Beckham. It has an ostentatious gold frame, which is great

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· May 14

We also saw a two different cranes!

A gray and white crane with a long beak. It is standing near trash and recycling bins, as if musing which to use. There is much green foliage behind the crane

A bluish-black crane with a large beak stands on the side of a regional park trail. There is much green foliage and a small mountain/large hill in the background

A closer look at the same crane from the last photo. It is a very cool bird

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· May 14

I recently made an interesting discovery about my kitty, Stitch: she sometimes looks like Andy Reid. This thread will document this surprising phenomenon.

A small dark grey kitty affectionately known as the Stitch Cat. She is loafing on a cat tree, which is also grey, and looking directly at the camera.

Kansas City Chiefs coach Andy Reid. He is wearing and all red Chiefs jacket and hat, and his spectacles. He also wears a look of deep reservation at whatever he is looking at

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· May 13

Two 7th graders gave me flowers this morning!

My hand holding 4 little flowers, 3 of them magenta and one of them yellow. They are very kawaii

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· May 11

Canela, a brown dog with curly hair, stretches out on a brown comforter at bed time. She wants to go to sleep, and that’s okie dokie

Lucy, as small black and white Havanese, laying about on the gray loungey chairs in my in-laws living room. Her hair in the front obscure her eyes and makes her face look like the dogs from the old looney tunes cartoons

Two sleepy dogs - one a small black and white dog and the other a moderately sized curly-haired brown dog - on a brown comforter. This was the most mellow they were while this close to each other the whole 9 days we were there

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 14

A movie couple that would definitely have a podcast

Timon, a meerkat, standing on Pumbaa, a warthog. Timon is wearing, a hula skirt, purple beads, and a little red hat. His arms are to hi sides as he smiles and sings. Pumbaa has a red apple in his mouth and still is beaming, with his large smile enhanced by his delighted eyes

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 14

Dorito straight up laying down on my face. He’s such a little cuddle-o :D

The Dorito cat - an orange and white kitty - laying down across my chest and resting his head on the lower part of my face. We are both laying down on my bed with white sheets adorned with pink flowers all over. You can also see my man bun

A side view of Dorito -a white and orange kitty - laying his head down on my face

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 12

In recognition of the “cat for a cat” rule of the Internet, here is the fabled Dorito, our current foster

Dorito, a sweet orange and white cat. He is looking up with an expectant expression because he wants the pets. The hair near his tail is shaved off because that is near where they amputated his right back leg. He is a an absolute sweetheart and trooper

Dorito, an orange and white cat, doing what I call the “Ready for Action” pose. The little snowman in the corner in the background had treats in it, and after finishing them off, Dorito is ready for more exercise…and snacks

Dorito, an orange and white cat, rests peacefully upon a pink towel. He is a very darling indeed as he slumbers

Dorito, an orange and white cat, rests upon someone’s back. He does enjoy a good sit on a person when able

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 11

I hope that this particular birthday is a wonderful and joy-filled day. Happy birthday!

A tabby cat with black, greenish gray, and orangish fur lays down on a blue rug. Bear the cats front paws are a set of strings, which are attached to several cute paper ballon cutouts. Thus, it gives the impression that the kitty is flying through the sky using 7 balloons, how delightfully droll!

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 6

Case in point

A stealthy stingray glides it way through the water

A stingray shows off its pectoral fins as it continues its trek. Another fine fishy friend whose name eludes me fritters downward on this aquarium morning

A lovely aquatic scene as a few fish. 1 is light blue fish with hi-lighter blue, orange and yellow fins and tail, and another is black with bright yellow stripes. A third is dark all over, save for the edges of its body and tail being yellow. The coral all around add even more for the eye’s to feast on as it is an aquatic cornucopia of color

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 5

My goddaughter is extremely creative and a wee bit macabre. Initially, she was making gummy bearamids (pyramids w/ bears) but that somehow evolved into gummy bear crime scenes

A gummy bear amid made of red, orange, purple, teal, yellow, cream, and deep red gummies. The dimensions are l: 6 gummies, h: 5 gummies, w: 3 gummies

Gummy bearamids made solely of the same color. From left to right, they are red, orange, yellowish, green, teal, and purple bearamids. The red one is clearly the largest while the orange has but 6 bears in it.

A gummy crimes scene, with four separate gummy victims lying in a pool of their own red gummy blood. Several gummy bears look on in shock and horror as a single gummy detective writes in their purple gummy notebook

A prelude to the mayhem, where a clear gummy bear and an orange gummy come across a most grizzly of gummy discoveries

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Apr 5

I think I nailed my Easter outfit

An Easter Godzilla shirt. Godzilla, in all his scaly-skin and spiked glory, wears a headband with white bunny ears on them. He also wears a pleasant grin, assuredly due to the large wicker basket he holds in hands. It is filled with rainbow colored Easter eggs. The sun is setting in the back, denoting a close to why is clearly another kaiju-tastic holiday

A bracelet that has a tiny Fern - from Frieren - where she wears her classic white dress/black robe/magic staff ensemble. The beads on the bracelet at black and purple - to match her robe and hair - and spell FERN. It also has metal butterflies on it

A bracelet that has a tiny Stark -from Frieren - on it. He is clad in his all black clothes, enhanced by his burnt orange robe and red hair. The beads are black and burnt orange to match, with some beads spelling out STARK in the middle. There are little metal axe beads as well, to match his battle axe

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Mar 31

Here’s Italy’s coach Gennarro Gattuso in gif form to describe their play in any given game, but especially today:

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Mar 31

Until it isn’t, may I offer you pictures of my dear Stitch Cat being very cat (alt text adds some fun, too)

The Stitch Cat, a dark grey kitty, laying on her back at a usual angle. Her back legs are spread wide and to the right while her front paws are facing the left, and also holding a small bee toy. Stitch Cat loves the bee toy

The Stitch Cat, a dark grey kitty, sits on a bed that has a lovely pink flower pattern. She sits on her booty and her back is slouched and upright like a panda

The Stitch Cat, a dark grey kitty, sitting on a carpeted floor against a wall. She is sitting upright and slightly slouched as if she were a wee drunk man

The Stirch Cat, a dark grey kitty, lays down on a carpeted floor in such a fashion as to defy most laws of movement. Her back legs are spread and to the left while her upper body and paws are facing g the right, as if her spine had been replaced by a slinky

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Mar 30

My mother-in-law could have just said “they’re in a colorful beach bag” and BOOM, done in 5 mins tops. Instead, I was on a wild goose chase in Box Land for 40 minutes because she didn’t mention a bag. And then got (Puerto) Vallarta and Cancun mixed up. Mind you, she was born and raised in Jalisco!

A very colorful beach bag that says Cancun, Mexico on it. It has stripes on it, and the colors from top to bottom are cadet blue, hi-liter yellow, red, teal green, lavender, and purple. There are Easter eggs inside (not pictured here though)

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Mar 30

WHY IS NOTHING LABELED?!???

A shed-like garage area awash with bins and containers of all colors and manner of bric-a-brac. Many of the plastic containers are Christmas colored (red and green), but do not always contain Christmas stuff. There is a wood shelf above those containers where many random bins have arts and craft materials, but nothing Easter-related, which I a what I have been tasked to find

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Mar 13

All of our support staff (including front office staff) are out today except Coach Walker and I. There are 6 teachers out. I will be in charge of bathrooms for 2 periods back to back. It is Friday. I have but one thing to say:

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Feb 27

Are you 66 percent leg?!? Holy Toledo. In that case, you say “Say ‘Hi’ to the Tooth Fairy” and you do like a spinning hook kick to their face, like so:

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Feb 4

Señor Spielbergo - dressed in a blue jacket, red hat, and glasses - explains to Mr. Burns and Smithers that the performance they just saw “es muy bueno”. They are all seated in a theater. Mr. Burns wears a look of judgmental chagrin, while Smithers seems bemused

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 22

Look at these absolute fiends

A bunch of sea gulls on the field at my school. There are feathers all over from them getting feisty with each other for no dang reason

Do not be deceived by why seems like a moderate amount of sea gulls. They take over the whole blacktop and field with their shenanigans

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 20

Ahoy, me mateys!

A “get to know me” questionnaire that has 30 questions on it. Apologies for not writing all the questions

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 19

Just adding the Alt Text to this one, mainly because I want everyone to have a chance at engaging with this mind-numbingly buffoonish attempt at making “freeze the rent” in NY seem like a bad idea. Michelle Tandler’s head is filled with hacky sack beads

A screenshot of a tweet by Michelle Tandler that will make at least one vein bulge from your head because of the inanity of the comparison. The text reads:

New Yorkers accepted “freeze the rent” without blinking an eye.

But imagine if you took all the city’s meat and put it in a freezer.

Would you want to eat it 20 years later? Or even 10?

Would you want to own it?

Freeze the rent = slowly decaying housing

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 14

Just wanted to remind everyone that one of the many wonderful things about Catarina Macario is that she scored a goal for the USWNT and immediately showed off her “Protect Trans Kids” wristband.

Catarina Macario, wearing a mostly white USWNT jersey, pulling up her long sleeve jersey to show a white wristband with the words “Protect Trans Kids” on it

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 14

One of the 7th graders brought an ancient rotary phone to school, pulling out of his backpack in front of staff and drolly stating, “Oh no, are you gonna take my phone?” (👇🏽 this is what it looked like)

An extremely old style of rotary phone. It is lean and black, with a side attachment for the binocular shaped piece that you listen through. The number rotary is at the base

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 14

And now, a moment of awkward but peaceful tranquility

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 13

He quit, did he?

An 8-bit Godzilla, light bluish green with eyes made of goldenrod, red and white. His imperial glare is cast imposingly, as though he knows every idea you are about to try. Above him, glowing in the inkish background, are the words “foolish and amusing”

Mexican Pirate King@christophicles· Jan 11