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Chronic Illness Humor (@chronicillness) · DIRTY

Chronic Illness Humor

@chronicillness

Chronic Illnesses + Autoimmune Disorders R no laughing matter but my humorous posts will make U feel better for while. #chronicillness

5,322 Following22,514 Followers26,415 Posts

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Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

One thing I wish people without chronic illness understood: I deeply miss my old life and the person I used to be.

None of this is enjoyable.

@thepotsicpanda

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

@chronicillness.bsky.social

Cause of death: Too anxious to call an ambulance

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

Visual: A meme featuring the Muppet characters Statler and Waldorf, the two elderly men with white hair, leaning over the edge of their classic red velvet theater balcony box with grumpy expressions. A watermark in the bottom right corner reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com".

Text: White text is superimposed at the top and bottom of the image:

"This Doctor Sucks! He's Not Even Helping Her!"

"Yeah, F*ck You!!!"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

@chronicillness.bsky.social

I weigh myself completely naked. If you don't like that, work at a different doctor's office.

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

@the_disabled_diva on insta

A graphic with a white background featuring a large, light-pink brushstroke texture in the center. At the bottom is a small cartoon illustration of a cute skeleton character wearing a bright pink bow and a pink long-sleeved shirt. The skeleton is sitting in a blue chair at a desk, looking thoughtful while typing on a laptop that has a small heart on its lid.

Text: Large, bold grey text centered over the pink brushstroke reads:
"IT'S HARD
TO CALL THEM
FLARE DAYS
WHEN THERE ARE NO
NON-FLARE DAYS LEFT."

Small black text centered at the very bottom reads:
"The Disabled Diva * Cynthia Covert"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

I agree

Visual: A photograph of a newspaper or magazine clipping. On the left side is a small, black-and-white portrait of a woman with short, dark, asymmetrical hair and a serious expression. To the right of her photo is a block of text containing a quote. The clipping concludes with a yellow highlighted attribution line at the bottom.

Text: The body of the text reads:

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

Visual: A meme featuring a large, fluffy tabby cat floating in outer space amidst a vibrant, colorful nebula filled with purple, pink, and orange clouds and bright stars. The cat has its eyes closed in deep, trance-like concentration as it plays a vintage black Korg electronic keyboard synthesizer floating across its lap.

Text: Black text on a white background above the image reads: "My brain when someone is giving me directions I just asked for"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 28d

@carrionhearted

I don’t have “joint issues”.

My skeleton is simply displeased with its confinement to a fleshy prison. It’s not “joint dislocation” It is my powerful, evil, magically inclined skeleton staging an escape attempt so that it can breach containment and terrorize the masses. And I’m here, keeping it at bay, for YOUR protection. YOU’RE WELCOME!!!

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@bendybunny.bsky.social

Stop being mad at yourself for being exhausted, for crying, losing patience or not having the time or energy to do absolutely everything. Stop being so hard on yourself, all of this is incredibly hard. You are doing okay.

Emily Coxhead

Bendy Bunny

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Chronic Illness Humor - [My Attempts To Look Fine In Public Blooper Reel]

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

1st panel: guy cheering (me) "yay! my flare from one of my disorders is finally over!!"

2nd panel: another guy waving at him (flare from another disorder) "Hi!!!!! I'm here!!"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

punkbonnibel on tumblr

I have one brain cell and it bounces around in my skull like a windows screen saver

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Artist: @explosm.bsky.social

Panel 1:

Visual: A Cyanide and Happiness comic strip panel showing two stick-figure characters standing together. The character on the right is wearing an orange shirt, leaning on a pair of crutches, and has a white cast on his broken lower leg. The character on the left is wearing a red shirt.

Text: The character on crutches says, "I BROKE MY LEG."

Panel 2:

Visual: The character in the red shirt smiles reassuringly at his friend. A small copyright label on the lower frame boundary reads "Cyanide and Happiness © Explosm.net".

Text: The character in the red shirt says, "DON'T WORRY MAN, I'M SURE IT'S ALL PART OF GOD'S PLAN."

Panel 3:

Visual: A larger panel showing the character on crutches in the foreground, looking comforted and smiling. In the background behind him, a cartoon depiction of God—with a long white beard, an angry expression, and a yellow halo—is hiding in a green bush while brandishing a wooden baseball bat.

Text: A speech bubble from God reads, "SHIT, HE'S STILL ALIVE. TIME FOR PLAN B"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Visual: A cartoon illustration against a solid blue background. At the center is a smiling, anthropomorphic yellow banana with cartoon eyes and white gloves. The banana is bundled up for cold weather, wearing red earmuffs and a red winter scarf wrapped around its neck. Above the banana is a red banner-style frame heavily topped with dripping white snow and icicles.

Text: Black text inside the icy frame reads: "HOT GIRLS HAVE TEMPERATURE REGULATION ISSUES"

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

is this pill bottle my mom

A pill bottle on its side and instruction say 'if overweight, lose weight' (circled in red)

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

"ME: Can you order some blood tests to figure out what is wrong with me?"

"MY DOCTOR:"

Visual: A photograph focusing on a large promotional banner hanging in a storefront window. The banner is bright yellow with a massive red number zero and a percentage sign, reading "0% INTEREST". In the top right corner of the image, faint grey watermark text reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com [Funny Chronic Illness Store]".

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Visual: A classic religious illustration depicting Jesus Christ with long hair and a beard, wearing a white robe. He is leaning slightly forward and knocking on a brown wooden door. A faint watermark in the bottom-left corner of the image reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com".

Text: Bold black text superimposed above the image reads: “Hey, Lorrie? It’s me, the Lord. Um, look. You need to stop telling the doctor that your health is in my hands. You’re gonna need to get the bloodwork done , take your meds & stop drinking buttermilk. okay?”

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Visual: An inspirational landscape image featuring orange-red sand dunes dotted with sparse green desert grass under a bright, glowing sunrise or sunset. A watermark on the right side reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com".

Text: Large, bold white text superimposed at the top reads: "YOU'RE DESTINED FOR GREATNESS." Smaller white text at the bottom contrasts it with: "And also physical therapy."

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Visual: A close-up photograph of a woman with long, brown hair smiling slightly into the camera. Snake plants are visible in the background. A small watermark at the bottom left of the photo reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com".

Nice! This Woman Saved On Healthcare Costs By Not Going To Any Of Her Doctor's Appointments

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@diaryofasickgirl.bsky.social

diaryofasickgirl

I don't expect everyone to automatically just know what living with my chronic illnesses is like. But I so appreciate people who are willing to try. Just listening and believing me is a great start.

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@THISCHRONICSTRUGGLE

I THOUGHT GETTING A DIAGNOSIS MEANT DOCTORS WOULD BE ABLE TO HELP ME MORE...
I WAS WRONG

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@ali_sivi

once i figure out how to log into mychart i'll be unstoppable

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@luv2read13.bsky.social

@luv2read13

has anyone ever considered that Dr. Pepper could be a gynecologist

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@chronicillness.bsky.social

*crushes the doctor's dismissive words with my bare hands* as I was saying...

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

@skittle624.bsky.social

@skittle624

UrgentMed sent me a happy birthday email, if that gives you any indication of my life.

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

inspirational-style graphic featuring white stylized text with a dark drop shadow overlaid on a scenic sky background. The background shows a sunrise or sunset, with bright sunlight breaking through dramatic clouds transitioning from orange and pink at the horizon to a deep blue above. Faint text in the bottom right corner reads "MyBodyIsTryingToKillMe.com".

The main text reads:
"Lord, grant me the confidence of a doctor who has known me for six minutes."

Chronic Illness Humor@chronicillness· 29d

meme featuring a movie still with text. At the top, bold black text on a white background reads, "When you finally go to your doctor and your symptoms stop showing:".

The image below is a scene from an Avengers movie showing Tony Stark (Iron Man), played by Robert Downey Jr., wearing tinted glasses and looking over his shoulder with an annoyed expression. To his left in the background, Doctor Strange is partially visible, and to his right in the foreground, Bruce Banner is looking at him.

White subtitle text at the bottom reads, "Dude you are embarrassing me in front of the wizards."

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