Darius Kazemi

@darius

I'm the administrator of this server. is where most of my stuff lives. I make Hometown along with a bunch of other fediverse software (see […] 🌉 bridged from ⁂ follow @ap.brid.gy to interact

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Darius Kazemi@darius· 22d

In a very real way, it's "Gödel, Escher, Bach" for kids! Like check out these pages. A pretty decent introduction to "proofs" for a very young child! Thinking about it now, the book came out 4 years after GEB -- I would not be surprised to learn that the author […] [Original post on friend.camp]

A splash page with 1970s "comix" style illustrations. Some text:

Start with any number you like and follow these rules. If the number you start with is even, divide it in half. If it's odd, multiply it by 3, then add 1. Whatever answer you get, apply one of these rules to it again. And do that over and over again—that’s the looping part. Here’s a sample. Start with 10. It's even, so take hali. That gives you 5. That’s odd, so multiply it by 3 and add 1: (5x3) + 1 = 16. Back to even, so take half and get 8. Half again gives you 4. Half again gets you to 2, and half again gives you 1. Since 1 is odd, multiply by odd 3 and add 1 to get 4. Half of 4 gives you 2, and half of that gets you back to 1. You're in a loop now and will be forever if you keep at it. Try the same procedure with 30 and see if what you get matches this: 30, 15, 46, 23,70, 35, 106, 53, 160, 80, 40, 20, 10, 5, 16,8,4,2,1,4,2,1.

This system for looping interests mathematicians. In fact, it has interested some mathematicians so much that they’'ve tried starting with everynumber from 1 to 1,000. Every one loops into that 4—2—1 pattern at the end.

Mathematicians are never satisfied, and the question they have is this: Will every number loop into that pattern? Well, there’s no telling. It’s not possible to figure out a proof. A proof an explanation that convinces everyone that something is true without their having to try it over and over again. As clever as mathematicians are, not one of them has come up with a proof that looping back to 4-2-1 will always happen. No one has found a number that doesn't work, but no one has been able to prove that any number will work. It just goes to show that mathematicians don’t know everything.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Jun 6

First Saturday morning of farmers market season!

Escarole, fava greens, chives, garlic scapes, red spring onion, strawberries, all laid out on a cutting board

The veggies from the previous image washed and cut and sitting in their mise en place along with a Chinese style chef knife and a half eaten pint of strawberries

Darius Kazemi@darius· Jun 3

Remember, POSIWID: the purpose of a system is what it dud

An image of "the dud" from The Simpsons. A nerdy boy who looks kind of like Millhouse van Houten, holding a wilted flower

Darius Kazemi@darius· May 13

Lol. Lmao. From @fediversereport https://connectedplaces.online/reports/fr162-eu-regulation-wont-save-open-social-networks/

Screenshot of text:

This makes it both incredibly funny and frustrating that the EC opens the report by saying that the DMA exists because “a small number of very large platforms were able to restrict competition including by imposing unfair conditions both on their business users and on end users”, only to then claim that this is now being addressed. According to the report, “alternative messaging services can now interoperate with WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger, which has already led to new providers, including a European SME entering the market with innovative new functions”. The European SME that the EC proudly points to as evidence of a healthy interoperable market is a chatting app with a single rating on the Apple Store. Single rating, as in, one (1) individual person has bothered rating this app. This is the only app currently operating that allows for WhatsApp interoperability. Meanwhile, the report says nothing about why other apps like Matrix, with significantly larger userbases and real interoperability work behind them, are not actually interoperating with WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Apr 14

Fuck, they really are automating all the factory jobs aren't they

Photo of a Cheesecake Factory vending machine

Darius Kazemi@darius· Mar 8

Just stumbled across this great photo of me giving my talk at CornCon 2017! (This was the one about Kellogg's Corn Flakes and masturbation, not the 2018 one about cron that you can find on my website) https://corb.in/shows/20170805-corncon/

Bald bearded man in a pink shirt speaking in front of a TV that appears to be off, with an identically pink hanging blanket behind the TV. Plus a bunch of hanging lights and weird art in a grungy basement.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Jan 6

My favorite thing on Bluesky is a labeler made by the Social Technologies Lab at Cornell Tech. https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:oubsyca6hhgqhmbbk27lvs7c It surfaces metadata on posts. Most useful to me is "This person posted more than 50 times yesterday." It […] [Original post on friend.camp]

Darius Kazemi@darius· Dec 12

I'm at the FISH IN THE FOREST TOOTH TOOTH I'm at the TOOTH TOOTH FISH IN THE FOREST I'm at the combination FISH IN THE FOREST TOOTH TOOTH TOOTH TOOTH FISH IN THE FOREST

A screenshot of google maps listing a restaurant (in Kobe, Japan) where the title is FISH IN THE FOREST TOOTH TOOTH and the subtitle is TOOTH TOOTH FISH IN THE FOREST

Darius Kazemi@darius· Dec 10

@shauna 6) choosing to list "America/New_York" or "Pacific Standard Time" (not formally standardized!) or just "UTC+8" or what have you entirely depends on what you expect your user's relationship to the time zone will be. For "familiar" time zones within one's […] [Original post on friend.camp]

Darius Kazemi@darius· Dec 6

I peek at Meta's Threads every now and then. Just saw an ad for an app that lets me bet on things like "what will Mr. Beast say in his next video?" though completely unclear what yes/no means in this context. I looked it up and this is being considered A Very […] [Original post on friend.camp]

Darius Kazemi@darius· Dec 4

Just added easy-to-read logs to the ActivityPub Fuzzer! Here's a log of the fuzzer pretending to be Bookwyrm, along with an example of what the Create(Note) and the Article review look like in Hometown. Note the "read article" link, which is a Hometown feature […] [Original post on friend.camp]

A simple "log" page with a "Clear Log" and "Mark All as Read" button. Underneath those buttons are UI cards, each formatted like:

title: Bookwyrm basic Article book review
Software: Bookwyrm
Time: now
Content preview: [a longish excerpt from Moby-Dick with header html embedded]

And "inspect" and "FSO" links, the former showing you the generated activitypub JSON blob, the latter taking you to the page on the Fediverse Schema Observatory for that particular schema.

A Mastodon-looking timeline with a note with a cat picture, followed by a shorter post with

Summary: "example bookwyrm basic Article book review (object.name)"

And then a "read article >" link

Darius Kazemi@darius· Nov 19

Doing some dev work on Hometown and thought "Oh crap, I need to test in a local environment how Articles will render in timelines. But I'm not running anything locally that sends Articles." Then I remembered, oh right, I literally released a tool for this last […] [Original post on friend.camp]

Screenshot of the ActivityPub Fuzzer. It has options to set a target inbox, send random schemas, emulate a Fediverse firehose, select specific schemas, and to post schemas to an inbox.

At the bottom of the screenshot a schema titled "Ghost Article with summary" is selected under "POST to inbox"

A Hometown timeline with a few test messages in it from a user called "Fuzzer". You can see the top message is an "example Ghost Article with summary (object.name)" and a "read article" expansion box beneath it.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Oct 14

lol, remembering I gave a talk at Webstock years ago called "Don't Make Stuff" https://vimeo.com/209324581 I gave the presentation in HyperCard using stock HyperCard clip art. This slide aged well!

Me speaking animatedly next to a slide that says:

Obligatory "America is Fucked" Slide

with clip art of a US flag and statue of liberty and map of the western hemisphere

Darius Kazemi@darius· Oct 11

Free road sign if you want it. also comes with free bag of trash

A sandwich board from a road construction site, with a full trash bag wedged into it, suspended in a large bush.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Oct 8

@julian yup! here is Hometown consuming spoofed NodeBB Article posts in a local dev environment running nothing but hometown and the fuzzer

Darius Kazemi@darius· Sep 17

obligatory "the two genders"

Photo of the remote for a bidet. Two buttons are labeled "Posterior Rhythm" and "Feminine Rhythm"

Darius Kazemi@darius· Sep 16

So I'm improving Article display in Hometown. @julian made this post: https://browser.pub/https://community.nodebb.org/post/105824 `content` and `summary` are ALMOST the same, so my software renders repeated content. I'd like to be able to say "if content and […] [Original post on friend.camp]

A post in a Mastodon-like interface where the same content is repeated exactly twice. The first instance is in all italics since it's supposed to be a summary. The second instance is the content itself, repeated, but no longer in italics except the parts that are actually italicized in the original post

Darius Kazemi@darius· Sep 5

Ok this is funny, I was reading Today in Tabs and it ended with a link to the story about the Browser Company sale, punctuated by a link to and excerpt from my 2014 satirical talk about how to innovate and get rich Article […] [Original post on friend.camp]

"After creating nothing of value, Josh Miller’s web browser company was bought by Atlassian for more than half a billion dollars. Lol, they’re all rich now. Infinite future lottery tickets!"

There is a link to the video of my talk, and a screenshot of a frame with me showing some bad math explaining that the value of community is $5000 a person or some such nonsense

Darius Kazemi@darius· Aug 22

Update: went with the self serve wide format at FedEx because I could same-day test out my concept for $5. When I do it "for real" I'll go to a nice local print shop. Anyway, here's "Berimbau"

A 24" by 36" portrait orientation poster of the lyrics to "Berimbau" by Vinicius de Moraes. It's in a monospace but cursive font called Victor Mono, and I laid out the words to emphasize the rhythm of the poetry. Black text on cheap white paper, mounted on a blue wall with thumb tacks.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Aug 21

I had to stop everything I was doing today to make this.

Famous panel from Alan Moore's comic "Watchmen". Drawing of an older man coughing up blood on the floor. Caption overlaid, which is obviously edited from the original, says:

"Heard joke once: Superintendent goes to principal's. Luncheon promised. Roast planned but ruined."

The next three panels in the sequence from "Watchmen." Instead of the original text, the sequence goes:

Panel 1: "Smoke explained as steam from clams. Principal sneaks out. Buys burgers to pass off as own cooking." This is superimposed over a picture of a mercenary holding a gun, the past career of the older man.

Panel 2: "Superintendent confused. Expected clams. Principal lies: promised hams, not clams. Regional dialect. Misunderstanding." This is superimposed on a first person POV shot of the older man from the original panel, present day, bloodied and held up by an attacker, from the POV of the attacker.

Panel 3: "House on fire from neglected oven. Superintendent asks what's happening." Flashback to the older man having killed his lover.

Last panel: "Principal says, 'Aurora borealis.'" Widescreen shot, from POV of assailant, where the older man is thrown out a window, glass shattering.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Aug 6

I made this neat little e-ink display for my kitchen with bus arrival times and hourly weather. It uses an ESP32 microcontroller device and talks to Home Assistant. More details here […] [Original post on friend.camp]

An e-ink display in a picture frame. It shows the current temperature and an icon indicating sunny/cloudy/rainy/etc. Below that it shows a row of forecasts for now+3hours, now+6hours, now+9hours. Below that it shows bus arrival times for two different Portland-area bus lines. At the bottom there is picture art of Lanino and Elnina from Deltarune, who are characters that represent the weather report.

Darius Kazemi@darius· Jul 1

I keep getting emails from "Portland Bureau of Trans." which one of you is sending these

Screenshot of a Gmail notification on an Android phone:

"Portland Bureau of Trans.
News release: PBOT says failure of state Transportation Reinvestment Package will..."

Darius Kazemi@darius· Jun 5

Okay.

A tiny metal, official-looking sign planted in grass that says "Please keep off the art installation"

Darius Kazemi@darius· May 20

Less notable but amusing to me is this image and caption, which taken together are extremely representative of me

Photo of a bald man with glasses and a big beard, squinting very hard at a little black notebook. The caption reads "Senior Software Engineer Darius Kazemi considers his notes while leading the panel portion of the first session."

Darius Kazemi@darius· May 9

What vibes do I give off? https://tinysubversions.com/vibes/

A grid of 3 rows of 4 images each. The first row contains:

Max Caulfield from Life is Strange, Johnny Gat from Saints Row: The Third, Sarah Kerrigan from Starcraft, Claptrap from Borderlands 2

Second row contains:

Ancient greek double reed pipes, a Zhaleika (a Russian wind instrument), woodcut of Tarpa dancers from 1886 dancing to a weird wind instrument, a collection of various woodwind instruments in a museum

Third row contains:

A Game Wave video game console, an unreleased game console called the XGP, a Retro Duo Portable handheld clone game console system, and an original Nintendo DS

Darius Kazemi@darius· May 8

Reposting a thing I made in 2017: the D&D alignment of each D&D alignment. (To be read as "Chaotic Good is the most Lawful Neutral of alignments" etc)

A visually confusing chart showing:

True Neutral is Lawful Good
Lawful Neutral is Neutral Good
Neutral Good is Chaotic Good
Chaotic Good is Lawful Neutral
Lawful Evil is True Neutral
Neutral Evil is Chaotic Neutral
Lawful Good is Lawful Evil
Chaotic Evil is Neutral Evil
Chaotic Neutral is Chaotic Evil

Darius Kazemi@darius· Apr 25

@puppygirlhornypost2 visit Portland some time (from Pinball Map)

A map showing literally hundreds of pinball machines geographically distributed around Portland, Oregon USA

Darius Kazemi@darius· Mar 5

Something I think about once a month is a poster from what must have been the 1980s that was in a pizza shop in the town where I went to college in the early 2000s. It was faded and blue by that point and featured an all American blond girl smiling and holding a […] [Original post on friend.camp]

Faded poster of an all American blond girl smiling and holding up a gyro

Darius Kazemi@darius· Feb 1

If people at #FOSDEM social web room want to see Hometown's Article support that @matt mentioned... this is it!

Darius Kazemi@darius· Dec 14

Come to Portland, Oregon if you want a really wet copy of The Wiki Way