David Pattie
@davidpattie
Teaches Drama at University of Birmingham. Scot. And unfeasibly tall. Written about Beckett, UK theatre, popular music, Eno, Kraftwerk, Velvets, Talking Heads, and why gigs look the way they do.
Headline writer: ... My job? Yeah, well (drags on cigarette, coughs), yeah, sometimes it's hard. But, y'know? Sometimes- sometimes, it just ain't hard at all.
Thankyew thankyew this one's for Jezzo an' Lizzo an the girls on table 3, yeah, 'cause humidity's risin', barometer's gettin' low, 'cording to all sources t'street's t'place t'go 'cause tonight for the firs' time roun' about half pas' ten for t'very firs' time'n history, 's gonna start rainin' men
Thankyou thankyou an now a tribute to them kings of rock Coldplay this's Viva La Vida ok yeah ha one ha two ha one two three four I usedta rule t'world Seas would rise when ah gave t'word Now in t'mornin ah sleep alone Sweep t'streets that ah used t'own
I have finished my first marking! Mead for everyone! Gather at the Maypole in joyous dance, for it is Summer!
New Reform councillor is 'super-creepy 1970s doll'. A spokesman said 'She seemed normal in the vetting documents, but she might have been holding the camera up close to look bigger.' Approached for comment, the new councillor said 'Why do you hate me so, Mama? Is it that I see the darkness?'
And it contains what is probably the single most unsettling image in all the BBC's ghost stories.
The May fourth with you it is ... Pardon? Fourth it is with you in May ... You OK? May is the fourth with you ... OK Yoda gimme your car keys Great disturbance in the guts I feel barf comes always the same it is pretzels lead to beer beer leads to tequila tequila leads to the dark side
So, this should, if the process works through, be the cover image for my next book. Which will be called Theatrical Performance and Popular Music. And not Revenge of the Shiny Space Giant.
It’s just… everything. I know. … … But look- What? He’s nearly 80. He’ll be dead soon. … True.