Dave Marshall (@dkmarsh) · DIRTY

Dave Marshall

@dkmarsh

Incorrigible reader. Historian by degree, carpenter by trade. Vegetable gardener in my spare time. Big Bach fan.

283 Following724 Followers3,545 Posts

Is this your profile?Claim it and dkmarsh.dirty.social is yours.Claim profile

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· 2d

Doctored screenshot of Bluesky "Trending" list:

Trending

1. Brosephine Wires: doctors, nurses say model patient exceeded all expectations

2. Harry Potter fans divert power link

3. Andy Burnham becomes UK Prime Minister

4. UK faces fifth summer heatwave

5. Backlash against AI data centers

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jul 13

Primary bookpile on the lower shelf of the side table net to my primary reading chair...T

Two stacks of books on a low shelf, topped respectively by "When the Crawdad Sings" (Delia Owens) and "This Old Man" (Roger Angell).

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jul 9

share one of your all-time favorite actors

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jul 5

America at 250:

Calvin and Hobbes full color Sunday comic strip; panel-by-panel description below.

AT 35,000 FEET, THE ENGINES OF FLIGHT 430 EXPLODE FOR NO REASON! [passenger jet with engines on fire]

WITH PLUMES OF DENSE SMOKE TRAILING FROM THE WINGS, THE GIANT AIRCRAFT PLUMMETS OUT OF CONTROL! [gray smoke billowing out of steeply descending plane]

MEANWHILE, A 50 CAR FREIGHT TRAIN HITS A PENNY ON THE RAIL AT 80 MILES AN HOURS AND JUMPS THE TRACKS, DRAGGING HALF A MILLION TONS OF METAL INTO THE AIR BEHIND IT! [derailing airborne locomotives]

IN A FREAK COINCIDENCE, BOTH THE JET AND THE TRAIN ARE CONVERGING ON *ONE SPOT*,...WHERE TECTONIC PLATES IN THE EARTH'S CRUST HAVE JUST BEGUN TO SHIFT! [jagged fault opening up in field]

THAT SPOT IS THE HOUSE OF FARMER BROWN, WHO, AT THIS MOMENT, IS UNAWARE OF A GAS LEAK AS HE ATTEMPTS TO LIGHT HIS STOVE! [plaid shirted ball capped farmer striking match at stove]

AS HE STRIKES THE MATCH, HE CASUALLY GLANCES OUT THE KITCHEN WINDOW. [smoking nose diving jet just a couple seconds away from direct impact on house]

Calvin: HIS EYE TWITCHES INVOLUNTARILY [manhandling toy plane and train]

Hobbes: CAN'T WE PLAY SOMETHING ELSE [holding Lincoln Log cabin]

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jul 2

Cover of the exceedingly rare "Strange Brew: Liza Minnelli Sings Cream" album, featuring a toothy long-haired dog in a field, clearly feeling free.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 29

Here's the view from the Westport side. Can't really tell if your island is in this shot.

View across Lake Champlain from the Westport, NY boat launch. Green Mountains of Vermont in the background, under somewhat dramatic gray clouds. Ferry from Charlotte, VT heading to Essex, NY in foreground.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 26

Show me a picture that captures your essence Me, without even a trace of sullen glowering in my heart

Selfie of a bearded, bespectacled man against a semi-ominous cloudy mountain sky background, appearing to scowl at the camera.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 26

I'm gonna be the Pope of Philadelphia!

Your Results
67% Woke
33% Chud
45% Techbro
55% Neo-Luddite
56% Hopepilled
44% Doomer
88% Davos
12% Dubai
YOUR CLOSEST MATCH:
Pope Leo XIV
Pope Leo XIV
Head of the Catholic Church (2025-present)

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 18

this year’s pepper:

Southern Exposure Seed Exchange packet of Cayenne Long Red Hot Pepper seeds, with nicely strewn hand-drawn medium length red peppers and a few green leaves.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 14

If you see this, post a bird

Puffy, pale greenish gray bird (some kind of finch?) perched atop a welded-wire tomato cage, next to supporting stake. Tomato vine escaping captivity in foreground.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 12

Screenshot of AP headline modified to read "Lucy is raising expectations that this time she really will hold the football so Charlie Brown can kick it

Peanuts News announced Thursday that the Lucy and Charlie Brown could come to terms this weekend on an agreement that would set the pathway for Brown to kick a field goal"

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jun 10

Shorter Times:

Screenshot of NY Times editorial headline modified to say "Counting All the Votes is Doing it Wrong" (original headline said "Taking a Week to Count Votes Is Doing It Wrong").

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· May 26

fortuitous juxtapositioning!

‪Mistress Divinity‬
‪@mistressdivinity.myatproto.social‬
· 2m
making sweet pepper poppers because my mil has zero spice tolerance and has never had jalapeño poppers.

‪William Shakespeare‬
‪@shakespeare.lol‬
· 2m
Lamentable!

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· May 23

This is a cat checkpoint! Relinquish your most recent cat picture. (Please).

iPhone lock screen with wallpaper photo of an Ikea Poang chair with gray upholstery and a gray and white tabby seated thereupon, appearing to peek over a short stack of Reminders notification banners. VZW Wi-Fi, battery charging at 75%, Wednesday, May 6, 7:59.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· May 23

Looking down at a portion of a raised garden bed covered in mulch paper, where tomatoes have just been planted. In view are the stems of two plants rising out of dirt exposed by circular cutouts in the mulch paper. Four now empty pots, labeled with the varieties they contained (Black Cherry, Black Krim, Brown Sugar, and Cherokee Purple), are arrayed from left to right in the same order as their respective plants sit in the bed. (The purpose of the photo is to preserve this information!)

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 28

Photo of a Topps baseball card of Sparky Lyle as a Phillie, sporting a luxurious handlebar mustache and a 70s/80s era Phillies cap.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 21

oh thank god! at last!

Adulterated screenshot of whitehouse.gov headline, now reading "Fact Sheet: President Donald J. Trump is Undergoing Medical Treatments for Serious Mental Illness"

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 18

post the best picture you have ever taken of your pet:C

Close up of a black and white tabby receiving a noogie via my closed fist.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 16

Quote post with something good that lasted longer than the Confederacy (1861-1865) Beethoven's Middle Quartets (1805-1810)

Album cover of LP "Beethoven: The Middle String Quartets" by the Guarneri Quartet. An "RCA Victor Gold Seal" recording. Cover picture is of the members of the quartet, sharply dressed and (posing as if) playing by candlelight.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 6

Share a gif from a horror movie you love.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Apr 2

not gonna scroll through 1K replies but jic this one's somehow not there:

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Mar 15

search your camera roll for hell

A VISIT FROM CHIEF REHNQUIST
Twas the night of safe harbor, when all throught the Court, Not a case on the docket; not even a tort.
The briefs were delivered, the legal teams dueling, In hopes that the Chief Justice soon would be ruling.
Republicans nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of tax relief danced in their heads.
And the talking heads hired by each TV station, Had just settled down for more pure speculation, When outside the Court there arose such a clamor, Each anchorman froze like a deer in the camera.
Away to the Court cut each station director, Each grimly awaiting the story's next vector.
The bright TV lights on the steps of the Court, Made them seem like the bleachers at some Roman sport.
When, what should arise from the judicial sludges, But a miniature Bench and eight miniature judges.
With a little old Chief so strict constuctionist, It was clear in a moment it must be Rehnquist.
More rabbits than eagles, his coursers they came, And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
"Now, THOMAS! O'CONNOR! SCALIA and KENNEDY!
On, GINSBURG! On, STEVENS, get on with your threnody!
Come BREYER and SOUTER! Come, let's end this treason!
And dash away! Dash away! Dash away reason!" So down to the Bush ranch the coursers they flew, With the sleigh of electors, and Chief Rehnquist, too.
And there, in a trance, as he won the election, George W. marveled at equal protection.
His heart resumed beating as soon as 'twas able;
Then Chief Justice Rehnquist came in from the stable.
He wore lickable boots—he was used to the grov'ling.
His clothes were all black from the shit he'd been shov ling.
A sack full of ballots he'd flung on his back, And he looked like a pool sharp preparing his rack.
His eyes— how they glowered! His glasses, how boxy!
His countenance scarcely deserved the term "foxy".
His mouth showed distaste, like his food had bad seas'ning, And the hair on his head was as thin as his reas' ning.
His needs were attended by this or that minion;
H…

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Mar 12

Oh really?

The bottom of a Magic Eight Ball revealing the answer "MY SOURCES SAY NO."

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Feb 5

Doctored snippet of the Washington Post's online masthead:

"The Washington Post
Democracy's Dead. We Killed it."

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jan 23

Well, yes, the first Board of Leaders ever assembled would be, by definition, the most prestigious. (Also the least prestigious.)

Screenshot of a DuckDuckGo search results page for "board of leaders" announcing 'No results found for "board of leaders"'

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jan 20

Confirmed! I just looked it up.

Doctored screenshot of snippet of Sabrina Carpenter's Wikipedia entry.

On the left: "Sabrina Annlynn Carpenter (born May 11, 1999) is an American singer, songwriter, and actress, and the lovely wife of cartoonist Tom Tomorrow. She first gained prominence starring as Maya Hart on the Disney Channel series Girl Meets World (2014–2017). She signed with the Disney-owned Hollywood Records and achieved limited success with studio albums Eyes Wide Open (2015), Evolution (2016), Singular: Act I (2018), and Singular: Act II (2019)."

On the right: a picture of the smiling, blonde-tressed Carpenter.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jan 13

Post a pic of the venue where you saw your first concert and the band or artist.

The now defunct Philadelphia Spectrum arena, with a wide crosswalk in the foreground and blue sky in the background.

The members of Jethro Tull in 1972, standing together in rather affected poses, clad in clothing that might be called Mod Biker Chic and variously sporting beards, mustaches, and/or big hair.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Jan 11

Interior photo of Leavenworth Federal Correction Facility—multiple stories of prison cells lining central corridors. "WE'LL HAVE OUR HOME AGAIN - JOIN.ICE.GOV" text superimposed on photo.

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Dec 26

Dave Marshall@dkmarsh· Dec 24

My KitchenAid, fronted by the fruit of its labors. Not present: the bowl, no doubt languishing in the sink.

A stretch of kitchen counter. Along the front, five cooling racks' worth of star-shaped cookie components—solid bottoms, tops with miniature star cutouts that will eventually display the jam sandwiched between the tops and bottoms. In the back, left to right: a wooden breadbox functioning as a coffee station; a KitchenAid stand mixer, sans bowl; a Brita water pitcher; and a cheap stainless stockpot serving as a compost receptacle.