jalepeño pauper (@fuzzler) · DIRTY

jalepeño pauper

@fuzzler

Contentment creator. Bitch. Lover. Child. Cat father. yr angle AND yuor devil. Deeply ashamed.

515 Following481 Followers2,180 Posts

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jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 7d

ALL Sales FinaL NO Refunds "on items"

Stack of DVDs and a book at the counter of a thrift store and a woman pointing to a sign that says 'all sales final no refunds "on items",' almost as though she knows the 18 Russian language action movies are region 5 and won't work on my DVD player

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 7d

spatula's

Plastic bin labeled "spatula's"

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 7d

cheese graders

Plastic bin full of cheese graters and an apple slicer

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 8d

Logging on

a large CRT monitor dug out of the mud and dead leaves it sits upon

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 11d

Status effect: NO WEED

Part of a video game instruction manual, namely a depiction of a burlap sack that says "NO WEED" on it

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 22d

At my elementary school, you weren't cool unless you had one of these bad boys

Orange dinosaur pencil holder/sharpener with tape dispenser. He has big googly eyes

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 25d

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· 29d

Nachos piled high with green stuffed olives, tomato, peppers, diarrhea lettuce, red salsa, cheese. And I didn't skimp on the sour cream neither

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 11

This is strange. I checked the source and there are two 12s. It also seemingly skips random numbers. How am I supposed to trust anything when the dang dictionary screws up "Horse, external parts"???

Horse, external parts. 1 Lips: 2 Nose; 3 Face; 4 Forehead; 5 Eye-brows; 6 Forelock; 7 Ears; 8 Lower Jaw; 9 Cheek; 10 Nostril; 11 Poll: 12 Mane; 13 Chest; 14 Withers: 16 Ribs; 18 Loin; 19 Croup; 20 Tail; 22 Flank; 23 Belly; 24 Shoulder; 25 Elbow; 26 Forearm; 28 Knee; 29 Cannon or Shank; 30 Fetlock Joint; 31 Pastern; 32 Coronet; 33 Hoof; 34 Fetlock; 35 Haunch; 36 Thigh; 37 Stifle; 38 Buttock; 39 Gaskin; 40 Hock; 42 Cannon or Shank; 43 Fetlock Joint: 44 Fetlock; 45 Pastern; 46 Coronet; 47 Hoof. A "horse" includes mare, gelding, colt, and filly. Rules of Racing Jockey Club, 1929).

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 8

hay guys check this out

Horse face diagram from an old dictionary labeled with numbers 1-12 sort out of order

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 6

Reminded today of a small Mexican Chihuahua

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 5

Sitting my ass down "cishet style" (swinging a leg over the chair & shoveling a big scoop into my mouth like Riker eating gagh)

Rainbow spaghetti with tomatoes

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 5

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 3

White & brown cat lying in the corner of a couch with ear bent against the armrest

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 2

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 2

Got a couple lenticular jokers

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jul 2

me & my boys when someone says "i don't like pickles"

10 11 & 12 from a deck of Spanish playing cards. Some fancy lads holding clubs resembling pickles.

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jun 27

fuck me did you know you have a little ghoulie in there. fuck that's frightening. he's having a munch. at least somebody is enjoying the food

Drawing of some anthropomorphic vegetables running to jump into a pan of green liquid

Text:
If you plan to cook two vegetables together in a sectioned pot, use two which won't impart their respective tastes or colors to each other. On the other hand, you can mix some new partners together in the same undivided pot, to good effect. Peeled onions and peas or string beans - sliced onions in stewed tomatoes - and peas with mushrooms, are tempting companions. You can do yourself a service by cooking more than enough at one meal for use the next. Do extra potatoes to serve hash-browned in the morning. Extra bacon goes

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jun 22

A black cat with white paws batting at the camera

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Jun 7

Man bursts into tears. Says "But, doctor... ...I am Elliott Smith (comedy magician)"

ad for an event in New Port Richey, FL: "Elliott Smith (comedy magician)"

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 27

DRINK SOME COFFEE PUT ON SOME GANGSTER RAP & Handle it

sign in a bathroom says "drink some coffee put on some gangster tap & Handle it" and there's a urinal beside it

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 25

My handshakes

Purina Moist & Meaty dog treats

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 24

For anyone who needs a quick recap of the eternal punishment... Show More

screenshot of Google results:

No results found for "Tantalus jokes are low hanging fruit".

Results for Tantalus jokes are low hanging fruit (without quotes):

Al Overview:

That is perfectly brilliant. It is quite literally the single greatest punchline in Greek mythology- making it the ultimate self-referential pun.

The Meta-Irony

For anyone who needs a quick recap of the eternal punishment:

Show more

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 14

I;m thinking about thos Zines

Deviant Underground Volume 3 w/ various zine material under it, including a special piece of paper that has been altered at an atomic level to emit positive vibes

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 9

A NUT FOR A JAR OF TUNA

Palindrome based card game. The card depicts a drawing of a dolphin trading a with a squirrel

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 8

nut some 🌝

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· May 5

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Apr 26

Yowzers!

A joker depicting an adult film actress with a blue choker, corset attached to dark garter belt stockings

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Apr 22

Working on zine stuff

Monopoly Man upside down with a box cutter open next to his neck such that it kinda looks like a guillotine

jalepeño pauper@fuzzler· Apr 16

This is what I was trying to find

wint

@dril

"The most powerful Genital is the mind."

2:40 AM

14 Dec 22