Newt Calkins

@graynewt

Adjunct professor of Film and TV specializing in screenwriting. Freelance story analyst since 2010. Award winning short horror screenwriter. Steve Martin fan. Clive Barker stan. Jim Henson man. Progressive lefty with a tendency for angry hyperbole.

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Newt Calkins@graynewt· May 20

Hey, two violent narcissistic assholes grinning at their overblown self-regard! I bet they're both just awful conversationalists.

Ronda Rousey fondly touches Dana White on the arm as she receives a UFC Hall of Fame award.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Apr 25

If you're on Bluesky telling other Bluesky accounts what is and isn't worth their time and effort to post, and you're doing it in a helpfully self-righteous tone, let me share an image.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Feb 26

The cover art for Cannibal Corpse's single of Hammer Smashed Face, featuring a pencil drawing of a human skull with eyes looking at the viewer, surrounded by lit candles.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Jan 6

Classics never go out of style.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Jan 1

This is probably more like her...

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Jan 1

Honorable mention. My favorite book for a very long time and certainly my favorite protagonist. Einstein the dog, not the human couple.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Jan 1

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Dec 30

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Nov 8

Paul in 6 months.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Nov 6

Judge me based on 4 favorite films.

The theatrical poster for Evil Dead 2, featuring a skull with staring human eyes.

The theatrical poster for Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, featuring Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet lying together on a frozen lake. The ice appears slightly cracked. The upper half of Jim Carrey's head is also visible in the lower corner, looking up at himself and Winslet on the ice.

The theatrical poster for Hereditary, featuring a stylized, off-putting cutaway of the movie's primary house location and its inhabitants in illogical framing.

The theatrical poster for the film The Royal Tenenbaums, featuring the main cast framed as the cover of a book. The book is surrounded by elements from the film such as a speckled mouse, an eagle feather, a yellow legal pad, etc.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 31

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 20

Is there any more perfect visual metaphor for this administration?

A view of the East Wing of the White House undergoing demolition as part of Donald Trump's effort to create a large White House ballroom.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 13

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 12

One of the greatest comedy leading ladies of all time. I know some of that legacy has awkward associations now but her explosive charm and power to control a funny scene among the funniest company are undeniable.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 8

Are we sure this is the Texas National Guard invading Chicago and not an elaborate Bill Swerski Super Fans sketch?

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Oct 2

Your columnist who cares about the AI model's virginity:

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Sep 23

There's only one Miran I would trust with the Fed. IYKYK.* *If you don't know, maybe don't search her at work.

A photo of Japanese transgender model Miran at an awards show.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Sep 18

In a still shot of a computer screen from the movie R.O.T.O.R, an unseen operator asks the computer to verify the stability status of the movie's central villain, the eponymous Robotic Officer Tactical Operations Reserve.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Sep 2

Using one photo already on your phone, what is the announcement tomorrow at 2?

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Aug 27

I think I found a picture!

An image of the Young Ones character Rick (played by Rik Mayall) from the episode titled Bambi, which is about the characters participating in a college quiz show. Rick is eagerly paying attention to the show's host. Someone (likely one of his teammates) has drawn the letter P before his name on the show's player booth. Rick looks eager, naive, and pompous.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Aug 21

A comic strip about an angry anthropomorphized sunflower asks the reader "What shall be done about the unhoused?". The unseen narrator suggests "House them?" to which the sunflower replies "Hell no!". The narrator then suggests "Lock them up for being poor?" to which the sunflower replies "Now we're talking!" The narrator then seeks clarity from the sunflower. It says "So... house them, but in the most expensive way possible?" The sunflower angrily stews for a moment. The narrator begins to repeat himself "I said-" but is cut off by the flower, who shouts "I heard what you said!!!"

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Jun 26

In a Kids in the Hall comedy sketch, two teens are being questioned by a police officer about a dead woman on the ground. The implication is that she has been impaled by the pointed top of her own gazebo, which they carried over a fence in a botched theft attempt.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Mar 30

The cover of "The Return of Bruno" album by Bruce Willis

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Feb 28

Dammit. I read this too late. Oh well. At least I sent along a cheery UK import attachment. And it's a comic book, so literacy won't be required on their part!

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Feb 28

All due respect to her, I have to keep yelling at my dumb 90s comedy brain to stop confusing Francesca Fiorentini with the Scott Thompson international film sensation.

Newt Calkins@graynewt· Feb 16

Finally started on this show. Silly that I kept putting it off given how hard it appeals to several of my interests. The pilot has romcom elements, punk music, goofy musical numbers (one of which involved sock puppets), fantasy cutaway sequences, and a crazy charming cast.