judging by the persistent muscle ache in my legs, i have only one thing to say: I shimmied too fiercely once again. 😮‍💨

home is where the dick speaks softly, or so I've heard

and why does my dick look so pretty every time I actually find myself in sound company?

there's a ratio of how hotel bed cosiness is inadvertently related to the plumpness of my butt

it's still hot outside ugh

okay, imagine this you guys, porn bad acting for whatever fake job they're working but the fake job acting is just so preposterous that it becomes an actual comedy. Like some pizza baker just yeeting an unformed ball of dough into the oven, going "yup, pizza's bakin', time for a blowie!" 🍕🍆

there's a twinkish boy with thicc thighs and a fat booty right in front of me on the sidewalk

I might be smelling of piss and cum

yes, that's it for every morning

Came hard after stretching my balls the entire day, just watered the plants. Think I should put it on again? 🥴🥴

is putting a ball stretcher on a respected solution to the metaphorical heaviness of your balls because you're horny as fuck?

update: even though temperatures are temporarily more bearable, climbing above the 30° mark after the weekend, the summer is still a bit too hot for me. And now to Kelly with the latest news from the football game.

another morning, another ten minutes of rolling left and right on my bed while chasing the heat out of the room

in other news, I might have accidentally written some sort of pamphlet the other day.

early wake-ups

It's hot outside. 😮‍💨

bro, can't help it. 😮‍💨

I just put some sunglasses on my Amazon wishlist. 😎 it most assuredly is unconnected to the fact that my fat ass just collided with my old ones that were lying on the couch. 🥹

should I chill on chaturbate while having my sauce Bolognese simmer later on?

good boys should never go without the feeling of their thick chain' weight around their neck

Spent the afternoon in rubber but damn, i think i should wait until winter till wearing full suits again, so much sweat. 🫠

is it noticeable that this July has me horny?

when you've gotta fold your laundry but are forced to man spread hard because of your ballsack. 🥴

I just asked my best girlfriend if she has hands, I'm so nervous, I never asked a lady something this intimate. 🥹

this is, like, 1,7kg and ufffff. 🥴 (And no, I didn't make it longer than five minutes)

why does this pic from yesterday kinda slap?

oh no, not me getting all sure on my way to the gas station 🥴 (Just kept it hanging after this btw)

wouldn't it be fun if I was literally throbbing and trying to stream at the same time? 🤣

Back in two hours, need food and new papes

what my smoke break looks like