I Ate Oklahoma

@iateoklahoma

REM was wrong. I don't feel fine at all.

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I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 5d

I hope this helps!

This is Ladybug waking herself up from a nap with her own flatulence.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 11d

If you haven't yet, I highly recommend eating Chinese food.

Egg drop soup, Singapore chow mei fun, some egg rolls still in the wax paper.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 11d

There's a goldfinch going to town on the sunflowers in my front garden and just kind of riding the breeze and I think we're best friends now, which really speaks more to my lack of luck in human friendships than anything else.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 13d

DAUGHTER: You're my birth father, right? ME: That's what the tests say. D: It's kind of a boring term. M: I guess? What would you prefer? D:

An air clay sculpture of the words BLOOD DADDY

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 19d

I think we're going to get some peppers this year.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· 25d

I would like for all of my plates to look like these.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jul 10

I am broadly anti-genocide with one (1) exception:

Sticker weeds, which do not need to continue existing on this Earth.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jul 6

You donate to save lives. I donate for the Nutter Butters. We are not the same. (You're better than me.)

A bandaged arm and a small package of Nutter Butters.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jul 6

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jul 5

PEKOE: Hey, when are these fireworks going to stop? ME: Probably when the severe weather starts. PEKOE: The what now?

Pekoe Marie is not a fan of loud noises.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jul 2

My kids are all hyped up for the National Caesar Salad Day fireworks. I hope they do one in the shape of an anchovy this year.

A picture of a Caesar salad with the text: National Caesar Salad Day July 4 #celebrateeveryday

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 30

I wish there were days without horrific, soul-crushing news because I really just want to talk about dumplings with y'all and how great dumplings are.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 29

These things don't need to be illegal, but they should probably be on a list of controlled substances.

A bag of Keogh's Truffle and Irish Butter potato chips

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 27

This cheap-o torch lighter and I share a philosophy.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 25

Can honestly say that, among the things I did not need to happen today, the dishwasher not draining is one I didn't need the most.

An already not-terribly-wonderful dishwasher doing that thing where it won't drain off the dirty water.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 25

Me: How does nachos sound for lunch? Wife: Isn't it kind of early to be thinking about lunch? Me:

Bruce Banner from "The Avengers" saying, "That's my secret, Cap: I'm always thinking about lunch."

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 23

Too much filling? For the presentation, yes. For my mental well-being, it was just right. Probably would've been fine if I'd just gone for a French-style omelet as initially planned, but then I saw the croissant buns just sitting there and...yeah.

An 8-(quail) egg omelet sandwich filled with ham, Burgundy mushrooms, red onion, and Boursin on a croissant bun.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 16

Starting to wonder if there's something wrong with this horse...

A very small Boston horse and me, a non-Boston non-horse.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 16

For one of the funniest cookbooks that also makes great food, definitely check out this new one from Greg Baxtrom called "Nothing Matters...but Delicious," as I did, from my local public library.

"Nothing Matters... but Delicious" by Greg Baxtrom

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 6

The cover of Tame Impala's song "Let It Happen."

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· Jun 1

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 31

No matter how big your dog is, I would eat its weight in Krunchers chips.

KRUNCHERS! chips are not the best tasting potato chips you'll ever eat, but they are violently crunchy.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 25

My wife texted me from the other room to ask me to come to her and, as the ultimate proof that she truly knows me, she followed it immediately with this:

A text message from my wife that said:
"(you are not in trouble)

lol"

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 24

Like a good neighbor, State Farm is ignoring you and hoping you'll go away.

Headline from The Oklahoman: Whistleblower docs show State Farm's decades-long strategy to deny claims

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 16

Pick a Bond from the photos you already have

Matt Berry, from his excellent album "Phantom Birds"

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 15

For future reference, The Silver Spoon's recipe for fresh egg pasta makes four servings for Italians or roughly one Greg-sized portion.

The Silver Spoon, which is considered the most influential cookbook in Italian history.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 14

Apologies. It's "Where Ya Bin." It was weird.

Something with a humanoid figure on it from Where Ya Bin

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 14

Somehow I am waiting in line for a store named "Where You Bin" at 9 a.m.

The line for the discount store Where You Bin, where you purchase stuff out of bins.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 11

WIFE: Why does the dog howl with you but not when I do it? ME: You gotta ask Pekoe. PEKOE: He got that dog in him.

I Ate Oklahoma@iateoklahoma· May 11

This is like the spiritual nemesis of the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.