Impudent Strumpet

@impudentstrumpet

Translator, blogger, wanna-be inventor, random internet stranger She/elle/sie/ella/ona Location: Toronto

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Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· 29d

Post a perfect album from the 90s that isn't nirvana, soundgarden, pearl jam, or alice in chains.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jul 9

Seen on a wine bottle. That...doesn't actually speak to quality or anything, does it?

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jul 9

I can't ever let anyone reply to my AO3 comments ever again

Screenshot of the header of my AO3 inbox, showing that I have 1337 comments

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jul 3

Bluesky synchronicity

First post from ‪Veronica‬ @veronicaf.bsky.social‬: "Ernie leaned into me, actively asked for and enjoyed pats, and then drooled because he enjoyed it so much.

I don't have photos because I have had a relatively awful day and thus had no Big Lights on, but Ernie! Love!

(Ernie is a cat, learning to not be feral, if you're new here.)"

Second post from ‪Good Trailcams‬ @goodtrailcams.bsky.social‬:

A trailcam image of two monkeys, likely feral. The one on the left is leaning in as though asking for pats, and the one on the right is patting them. Left appears to be enjoying it, and I can't rule out the possibility that they're drooling.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jun 29

Bluesky synchronicity

First post, from ‪Orcspiration‬ @orcspiration.bsky.social‬:

"YOU MUST DO YOUR STRETCHES TO HAVE STRENGTH TO WIN A RIGHTEOUS BATTLE."

Second post, from Hopping Crow‬ @hoppingcrow.bsky.social‬:

Photo of a dog with their front legs on the floor and back legs on the couch in a way that evokes the upward dog yoga stretch, with the caption "I am not stuck. I am just resting in this very comfortable position."

Original alt text for the dog photo: "Fuzzy black-and-white dog with front feet on floor and back legs stretched out on couch pretends she thought this move through"

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jun 26

Vermeer's famous painting Girl with a Pearl Earring, who is side-eyeing the viewer over her shoulder at practically the same angle as the deer-like creature in the original post

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jun 20

Sharing with alt text:

POV of a trail cam in a wooded area. Approximately five absolutely adorable little monkeys (possibly squirrel monkeys) peer curiously into the camera, in a way that suggests they're moments away from disassembling it to figure out how it works

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jun 16

Same thing with alt text, with some context provided by this article: www.australianphotography.com/news/snow-le... (Content note for article: the wildlife photos shown include animals killed for food (no gore), orphaned babies, and zoomed in close-ups of bees)

A snow leopard, floofy with cold, faces away from the camera but looks back over their shoulder at an angle perpendicular to the camera, evoking how movie stars sometimes pose on the red carpet. The look on their face is wistful and majestic, with pale greenish eyes that nearly glow.

They're standing on a mountain covered in a thick blanket of snow, with a mindblowing view of the Indian Himalayas stretching stretches out to the horizon, where the sun is setting in trans rights colours.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Jun 13

Same thing with alt text

Antlered deer looking majestic as fuck, standing in front of some tall sunflowers also looking majestic as fuck, while on the horizon is a sunset in trans rights colours also looking majestic as fuck

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· May 29

Someone with, like, money and influence and event-planning skills should hire all these artists for a counter-concert that raises money for some good cause that helps people Trump has harmed

Poster for the Trump-backed "Freedom 250 Great American State Fair" concert with the 6 (out of 9) artists who pulled out crossed out.

The artists who pulled out are Martina McBride, Young MC, C+C Music Factory, Milli Vanilli, The Commodores, and Morris Day & The Time. The remaining artists are Vanilla Ice, Flo Rida and Bret Michaels.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· May 27

The interesting thing is a Google search in Verbatim mode turns up zero results for "smells like violets and social change." So either they're suppressing the pages where the phrase appears, or the phrase doesn't even appear on any of the pages they're allegedly citing

Screenshot of a verbatim Google search for "smells like violets and social change", showing zero results

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· May 26

Attempting alt text because I can't resist sharing it, but if anyone actually knows what the structure is, please do chime in!

Black and white trailcam image of a bear climbing a ladder that leads to some small treehouse-like structure on stilts. My headcanon is that the purpose of the structure is to shelter people from bears.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· May 20

Same thing with alt text:

trail cam photo of a bear standing on their hind legs, looking exactly like a human wearing a bear suit.

The bear is blackish/brownish coloured (I can't tell if the species is black bear or brown bear or something else), and the forest they're in contains both deciduous and coniferous trees, typical of temperate regions of North America

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· May 13

Boldly and unapologetically offering the absolute minimum skill and effort humanly possible #OliveArt Someone with art theory/history knowledge could probably name an official art style that it could be argued this falls under

A crappy 10-second MS Paint drawing. One scribbled line in the approximate colour of the olive vaguely alludes to the oval shape of the olive. At the end is an orangish dot that vaguely alludes to the red thing at the end of the olive (It looked orange to me in the original photo although I'd call them red IRL)

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 26

I just got here and have no idea if something happened or these are four unaffiliated people talking about four unaffiliated things or something in between

First few posts in my bluesky timeline:

1. From ‪Nathan Goldwag‬ ‪@goldwagnathan.bsky.social: "Many people in my mentions proclaiming this the Reichstag fire, and it is very funny to imagine an increasingly-frustrated White House staging false flag after false flag, trying to get somebody to notice."

2. From ‪lauren‬ ‪@lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com "it is kind of funny we finally found a legal boundary donald trump respects and it's a ballroom fire code"

3. From ‪Kari Dru‬ @karidru.bsky.social‬ "Hey I was asleep due to The Malaise so forgive my ignorance but- what fresh hell?"

4. From ‪William Gibson‬ ‪@greatdismal.bsky.social: "Oh please. Really."

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 17

Skyline synchronicity:

Two posts in a row in my Bluesky timeline

First post: Gold @golf4miami.bsky.social‬ asks "If you were a train. How many times would you chugga before you choo choo?"

John Scalzi @scalzi.com replies in quote: "The standard six. You can't beat the classics."

Second post: Cait Gordon ‪@caitgauthor.bsky.social‬ says "On a train bound for Toronto! My first time going to the Toronto Indie Author Conference!

Fun fact: Their acronym is TIAC, which is Cait backwards.

COINCIDENCE????"

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 16

What did y'all do??

Screenshot of my Bluesky notifications page. The column on the left shows a badge with 30+ notifications (a very high number for a tiny account like me!), but the middle column where notifications usually appear has an ominous red banner that says "Forbidden"

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 12

With alt text

Trailcam image of an absolutely adorable floofy little kitten who I want to pick up and cuddle more than anything, but will probably grow up to be some kind of wildcat who would murder me with a swipe of a paw if I tried that (or may even as a kitten be capable of doing so already)

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 11

Same thing with alt text

A beautiful trail cam image of a wetland during the golden hour. In the foreground, posed perfectly for the camera, a soft-looking deer-like creature with small, velvety-looking antlers (as though they're fairly new to growing antlers) lifts up their hind leg and sniffs or licks it in a way that evokes the body language of cat.

If the deer were deliberately posing for the camera, it couldn't possibly have come out better than it does here.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 8

Princess Bride gif: "You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well. I accept"

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 7

Resharing with alt text so everyone can appreciate it

Dolly Parton's
IMAGINATION LIBRARY
Dear Imagination Library Graduate,
My, how time flies. It seems it was only yesterday when your family and friends read you your first story. You were just a baby. Now you're five years old and about to go to school. How exciting!
This may be your last book from my Imagination Library but you have to promise me you will keep on reading. If you go to your local public library you will find a great number of books just for kids your age. Every book is a treasure and every time you open one up you will meet new friends and take wonderful journeys to magical places.
I hope you have a great time in school. I bet your school will even have a library where you can check out books. You and all of your friends are very special. There is no limit to what you can do or how far you can go. Just remember the lessons my family taught me dream big dreams; learn everything you can learn; and care for all those who care for you. You do all of these things and you can be anyone you want to be.
You are terrific, and remember...
I Will Always Love You,
Dolly

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 4

The "click here" on this banner on top of the LCBO website just takes you to a Google Maps search of "LCBO near me", with no indication whatsoever of which stores are open Easter Monday

All stores are closed April 5. Select stores are open April 6. Click here to see store hours near you.

Impudent Strumpet@impudentstrumpet· Apr 3

Does anyone know who originally made this meme, so I can give proper credit next time I have cause to use it? I know the comic strip is Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson, but I'm wondering who originally labelled it with Canadian political parties.