Alan Woke
@jacobclifton
gay writer and critic in ATX
Every time you think the Drafthouse has lost all credibility, they grab a shovel and start digging.
If i had to stand next to Matt Damon for any length of time I might become a serial killer too
Where Ambrose is as sweet & chill as hell, Anaïs is... Anaïs is more like a Sean Young figure It's why we get along. To the extent that we do
That picture with Ambrose is one of my will time favorites. They're calling it a "mini-stroke" & he thinks he'll be home tomorrow. I hope he's right!
When Ambrose is feeling courtly he likes to "kiss" you by getting his face in your face and staying there for a few seconds, mouth to mouth, very solemnly. Here he is kissing his papa King Baby, who I'm sorry to say is currently in the hospital. Please send good vibes, as mine are quickly depleting
I couldn't decide which was cuter, so you're getting both. This is Ambrose at level 1 joy. At 2 he grins much more widely & his tongue hangs out, while at level 3 his tail whirls around & around like a helicopter. Level 3 is as high as I've seen it go
Ambrose has tried to teach this game to Anaïs, to no avail. She thinks it's dumb as a concept. "Why, Ambrose, would I not simply bite you?" Here's a photograph of Ambrose looking alert. Must be the five minutes of each day he spends neither sleeping nor stretching luxuriously with heavy sighs
Anaïs isn't feeling too good, which is unfortunately when she's at her cutest — she'll let you up in her face, which normally is reserved for special occasions. I just kissed her little warm forehead & told her she is beautiful & good & a soft little croissant & she didn't even growl! ft King Baby
"Darling, I'm sorry we dismantled your fortress, but you need to learn we are not at war" — King Baby said this a while back during a private summit with Anaïs & I haven't stopped thinking about it
one of those octopus movies where a person becomes friends with an octopus, but it's me trying to figure out my alien dog Anaïs Me: "Why is it that you are so weird & scary so much of the time?" Anaïs in her scary voice: "Propriety is death process"
turns out the beard is the brand I made a mistake — a trim became a massacre At least if it were October I could say I was going as January 6th
Dear Mitch, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'/ I left my cell, my pager and my home phone at the bottom
You're gonna let JCO name your daughter and then act all surprised when JCO shows up on her 13th birthday all, "I have come for the child that was promised me!" and turns Valerie into a horcrux
& here are some lovely pics of my little girl. where was she on Jan 6? she won't say
I wrote a character 10 years ago & the first thing I knew was he had one eye the color of sand & one the color of the sea. I still can't believe I ended up with the dog of that! My one pet wish, before I got a dog, was to one day have a dog with one ear that goes up & one that goes down & well...
Every morning, I open a capsule of probiotic powder & sneak it into her food. She would be so incensed if she knew! Finding a semi-cure for her tummy has afforded her twice as much of the particularly uncanny energy she gives off
Ambrose & Anaïs say stay cool babies! Ambrose: class act, hidden depths, full of love Anaïs: gorgeous, nuttier than a shithouse rat, full of fire When The Daily starts & he howls, it sounds like the earth itself is in mourning When she barks, it sounds like she is witnessing her own murder
The Oracular Spectacular proof has arrived and it looks killer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she adores Ambrose because he always indulges her — here is Anaïs staring at him until he wakes up
Anaïs likes to be outside more than Ambrose even. He used to like hanging out at night by himself. Just sitting in the grass being quiet — such a good kid. But Anaïs is not that kind of dog. She is definitely out there patrolling, like Buffy — she is vigilant, if nothing else, & lives for the chase
Anaïs has briefly climbed off of me & I wanted to document it. Look at her! She's so mysterious & inviting! She HAS to be an Aquarius, has to
They say it takes 3 months to bond with a dog & I believe it. But today she spent 30 minutes wiggling around in my lap & giving me hugs & leaning her head against my chest. She still prefers King Baby — but I got some legit love today & that's not nothing
2 angles on sibylline Anaïs — one eye that's a lovely honey brown & one eye you can see here that is ½ brown & ½ ice blue. Mesmerizing, strange girl. She also smells better than most people, if I'm being honest. Intoxicating. Unexpected bonus of having a Kissing & Hugging Bandit