J¡m Vaughn

@jiminyspigot

AS SEEN ON THE INTERNET!!! Whirled famous, editorially codependent writer of silly things. Too normal for the weirdos; too weird for the normies. STL based carpenter, basement poet, and full time caretaker. He/him.

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J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· 26d

Crispy tofu salad with miso tahini dressing. Worth the diarrhea risk.

A black bowl with a mixture of spinach and arugula, shredded carrots, sliced cucumbers and radishes, snap peas, pan fried tofu, and a miso tahini dressing.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· 27d

That's enough for today. I think it's time for a shower beer.

A hand dug 8 foot by 8 foot shed foundation with a concrete form filled in with gravel in the bottom.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· 27d

Today's new friend: this juvenile five-lined skink (𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘥𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘴).

A very small (approximately two inches) male five lined skink, a dark lizard with five bright orange lines running the length of it's back and a bright blue tail.

#herps

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· 29d

This place hang dries their lamb chops.

A table in a restaurant with four lamb chops hanging from a metal rod suspended over a wooden serving tray.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· 29d

Ugh. That tree has been parked there for weeks. When are they gonna tow it?

A small cut down tree laying in a row of street parking spots.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 15

For no particular reason, I've started putting Simpsons quotes over stills from the Pokémon anime.

An image of Ash from Pokémon holding his arm up and with a smarmy/sassy expression on his face. Subtitles read, "I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaming"

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 13

Today's new friend: this dagger moth larvae (𝘈𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘢 𝘴𝘱.) Note the "no touchy" hairdo.

A pale yellow caterpillar resting across several blades of grass, covered in long fine hairs with several patches of even longer black hairs.

#nature

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 11

What the fuck? What the actual fuck am I looking at? I know I'm in Missouri, but still...

An awful, awful coffee mug that says "I heart my husband" but the letters are in a kid's handwriting style resembling crayon.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 11

For Caturday, I present blanket cat.

A grey diluted tortoise shell cat named Moonshine, with just her face visible between a red blanket and green cushion.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 11

On my second outfit of the night, drinking a fabulous beer.

A can of Montucky beer with a rainbow and alicorn on it.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 9

When Super Craig is finished chasing down his roaches, he usually poops. He stiffens his back legs and lifts his tail in preparation. We call it "assuming the poopsition." I just thought you should all know that.

A bearded dragon sitting on a wooden floor, holding his head up.

#herps

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 8

I had never seen a DC license plate before today. I honestly thought this was one of those fake sovereign citizen plates at first.

A Washington DC license plate with the slogan "end taxation without representation."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 8

Might as well be...

An image of Joaquin Phoenix's head pasted over the sun, as in "Joaquin on the sun."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 5

Time line cleanse.

A black manx cat with a missing left eye named Fig laying on her side with her front paws tucked in near her torso.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 4

For no particular reason, I've started putting Simpsons quotes over stills from the Pokémon anime.

A still from Pokémon of Ash angrily squaring off with a samurai character, both holding up pokeballs. The samurai character is speaking, and subtitles read, "If you're gonna get mad at me every time I do something stupid, then I guess I'll just have to stop doing stupid things."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jul 1

Meanwhile, this little psycho 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺𝘴 heatwaves.

My torso with my arm held across my chest. On it is a bearded dragon enjoying the sun.

#herps

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 30

For no particular reason, I've started putting Simpsons quotes over stills from the Pokémon anime.

An image of Brock from Pokémon saying, "it takes two to lie - one to lie, and one to listen."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 29

Mine doesn't enjoy being high enough up to knock anything over, but I assume that's due to lack of balance 𝘢𝘯𝘥 depth perception.

A black manx cat with one eye laying on a rugby on her side with her head looking back behind her.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 28

Enjoy this gif of my little goblin.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 28

posting feets

A photo of a komodo dragon on a large flat rock, zoomed in to show only his two front feet splayed out, each toe capped with a long sharp claw.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 28

Today's new friend: this juvenile toad (𝘈𝘯𝘢𝘹𝘺𝘳𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘱.)

A very small dark green toad, about an inch long, sitting on my fingers.

#herps

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 26

Amazing. It's rock hard yet soft at the same time.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 26

Oh, really?

A sports news image about all 3 host countries for the World Cup qualifying for finals, Canada, America, and Mexico. In three big letters is the word "CUM."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 25

Literature has been all downhill since this 1904 pamphlet.

An old newsprint pamphlet with a drawing of a toad that reads, "BEAUTIFUL MR. TOAD
THE NATURALIST FINDS MANY POINTS IN HIM TO ADMIRE.
Silly Superstition Has Blinded the Eyes of Many to the Splendid Dress and Conduct of the Gardener's Friend."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 24

Up next in our series of comic panels that go really fucking hard but not in the way the writer intended...

A silver age comic book panel of Captain Marvel (DC) telling two men laying in the grass, "Men! Get back to work! You have to earn a living!"

One of the men is replying, "Scram, kid! Boy, this is the life. I'm never going to work again. It's silly."

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 23

Who remembers that episode of Star Trek where the crew celebrated Halloween and Riker dressed up as Orson Welles?

An image of Jonathan Frakes from Star Trek in old makeup from the episode All Good Things that makes him resemble Orson Welles.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 21

The ethical society of police being fenced off and boarded up is the most American thing ever.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 20

Help me shame Super Craig for eating a 𝘣𝘦𝘦 while enjoying his favorite clover patch.

Me (composite white guy) leaning over slightly with my head/face a bit out of frame with a bearded dragon laying across my neck/shoulders.

#herps

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 20

I'm not sure what this says about me, but I bought a 40 of Victoria and have been drinking it while watching this incredibly young spotted orbweaver build a web by my driveway. It's by far the smallest I've ever seen, and the earliest in the year I've ever seen one, too.

A small orange spider hanging from a few strands of webbing against a dark background. It is approximately 3mm long.

J¡m Vaughn@jiminyspigot· Jun 18

For no particular reason, I've started putting Simpsons quotes over stills from the Pokémon anime.