Joe Rybicki

@joerybicki

He/him. Writer, video game consultant, virtual tourist. Former Official U.S. PlayStation Magazine. Other credits: higround.net/#bylines

162 Following460 Followers3,462 Posts

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Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 6d

Here’s what it looked like when I tried the first time:

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 11d

Oh actually the main page doesn’t either:

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 11d

I dig this a lot, but fyi the box score doesn’t scale with system-set font size:

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 11d

As a timeline cleanse, sharing this awesome beetlebutt (mainly for @tkingfisher.com in case she has some insight into their reproductive habits that she’d like to share)

A greenish beetle is shown in closeup so tight you can see the weave of the bar towel it’s hanging out on. It is egg-shaped (kinda tick-shaped tbh) but has these awesome horizontal brown and green striations across its butt, except with a black void dominating the center, looking like someone stabbed it with a fountain pen

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 12d

Me, something like eight years later:

A closeup of my right pinkie finger. Its tip is noticeably less rounded on the right side.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 12d

Somewhat related: Google Maps traffic just before 5 pm on April 8, 2024 (by me) (fine, and google)

A Google map of most of the Eastern half of the U.S., with traffic turned on. It shows patches of yellow and red indicating slow traffic in a noticeable distribution, angling from northern Vermont and Montreal in the northeast going southwest through Cleveland, Indianapolis, Cincinnati, St. Louis, Memphis, and northwest Arkansas. Most major cities outside this corridor show much smaller areas of red or yellow shading

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 14d

As proof that the writers of our timeline are getting lazy, our hometown mall is now an Amazon warehouse. But when it was rockin, it was glorious:

A shot of Randall Park Mall outside Cleveland Ohio. Pic is taken from the upper level and shows the weird crisscrossing ramps that ran through the middle of the place. The carpet is a deep red and one can make out Cinema I II III, which from the outside appears to be the size of a Spencer’s. Below is a glimpse of a kind of amphitheater with curved stairs surrounding a stage with mustard-colored carpet. Above is an abstract hanging structure consisting of huge panes of glass connected in random positions. Not pictured: the smell of the Hot Dog on a Stick joint just out of frame.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 23d

What’s your sign?

A triangular yellow caution sign in China depicts a car falling off a roadway into water.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 24d

A black screen with HIDEO in the upper left in monochrome-monitor green

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 26d

Decided to make myself feel worse by looking up that Cedar Point commercial but instead I got to feel worse by discovering anew how badly Google fucking sucks now (apparently Gemini thinks “sad” means “scary”??) Got so frustrated I decided to google it. It’s beyond parody at this point:

A screenshot of a Google search for “why is google fucking useless now” returns the following result:

Al Overview:
“Google search feels useless now due to overwhelming ads, aggressive SEO spam, and intrusive Al overviews that push real content down the page.

Ads and Monetization
• Top of the page: The entire viewable screen is often taken up by sponsored ads and shopping carousels disguised as organic results.

• Revenue priority: Maximizing ad clicks drives changes, prioritizing commercial profit over user efficiency…”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 28d

@boostblue.bsky.social Here’s another, maybe you can catch it. Screenshot below if not

A screenshot of a response to a post seemingly presented as a standalone post

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· 29d

I mean

A Google search for “your mouth my chicken chaucer” (having already been corrected from Google’s assumption that “chaucer” means “chausser”) returns the following “AI Summary”:

“It sounds like you are referencing the clever rooster Chauntecleer tricking the fox in The Nun's Priest's Tale by Geoffrey Chaucer! In the poem, the fox opens his mouth to boast just as Chauntecleer cleverly flies away.

If you are instead looking to make a delicious, mouth-watering Chicken Chasseur (the classic French hunter's stew) for your own mouth, here are the core ingredients you'll need: & Nicky's Kitchen Sanctuary
• Chicken: 4-6 bone-in, skin-on thighs or drumsticks
• Veggies: Sliced mushrooms, chopped shallots or onion, minced garlic…”

For the record, “Your mouth, my chicken!” is a *direct quote* from *The Miller’s Tale* in *Chaucer’s* Canterbury Tales

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Jul 11

God Dammit

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Jul 9

Seriously! Look at this dumb shit! You know how many people came to this show? Literally as many as the venue could legally hold. The fuck outta here with that “gotta have an artist” bullshit.

A flyer for a punk rock show in 1995. It is printed on green paper and features the following words, printed in all caps, times new Roman, on a shitty inkjet printer, and pasted over a map of Ohio:

WHATEVER…

THE REAL CD/LP RELEASE SHOW

FRIDAY, AUGUST 11th

PEABODY'S DOWNUNDER

WITH DREYFUS
AND OTHERS?

SHOW STARTS AT 9:00pm

$3.00 PLUS THAT 21 AND UNDER CHARGE

NO MAN, WOMEN OR CHILD SHOULD MISS THIS ONE!!

ROCK AND ROLL LIVES

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Jun 27

Principal Skinner says “Am I so out of touch? …No, it’s the voters who are wrong”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Jun 26

This is magnificent. I immediately screen-shotted this to share with non-bsky friends. Including it here with alt-text in case you wanna do the same

A Bluesky post from Aaron Rupar, @atrupar.com, shows a video from CSPAN of Representative Tom Emmer, R, an old white man in a tan blazer and blue tie. The post quotes him as follows: "Minnesotans are so afraid that you're gonna call us a racist, you're gonna call us an Islamophobe. You know what? I'm done being even the least bit careful. Somalis don't assimilate. And if they don't assimilate, then they should go the hell back to where they came from."

Brandon Friedman, @brandonfriedman.bsky.social, quote-posts the above and says “21st century America is a multiracial democracy whose commerce, culture and cuisine reflect the influence of immigrants from every country on earth. The only people seemingly unable to assimilate into this society are white Republicans.”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Jun 9

Joins this one for dumb music pun memes, a surprisingly robust genre

Three otters pop out of a water chute. Above it reads “hello from the”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 25

Mustachioed man with a drumstick flute says “Bitch”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 20

What an interesting choice of word. I would have gone with “thanks to” From: https://www.npr.org/2026/05/20/nx-s1-5822419/ai-colleges-commencement-booing

A screenshot of a segment from the linked article. The relevant passage reads "’Gen Z, despite being more familiar with Al, is the most pessimistic about jobs, with 81% saying that Al will decrease job opportunities,’ said Chetan
Jaiswal, an associate professor of computer science and associate chair of the Department of Computing at Quinnipiac who also worked on the poll.”

The word “despite” is highlighted.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 20

this is a cat picture check point. relinquish the most recent cat picture on your phone.

Two black cats and a tuxedo cat sit in front of a sliding screen door. The middle one is gazing up raptly at something flying by. Not pictured: the cutest little chest blaze and white tail-tip of the foreground feline

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 19

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 17

2080 (the number of hours in a year of work at 40 hours a week)

Divided by

8 (the number of hours in a standard work day)

Equals

260 (the number of days most people who work full-time work)

*to be clear a lot of folks get 10 to 30 days of paid time off, so for the sake of completeness:

260-30 = 230.

And for further completeness:

230 - 140 = 90.

And just to close the circle:

90 days of work is 4.14 months at 40 hours a week.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 8

Give me your favorite non-Trek performance from a Star Trek actor

Dwight Schultz (“Reginald Barclay”) as Howlin’ Mad Murdock on The A-Team, a slightly crazed-looking white man wearing a black baseball cap, the then-ubiquitous headphones with the orange foam earpieces, and a battered leather bomber jacket, Hawaiian shirt, khakis and worn black hi-top Chucks, sits on a car hood with his fingers pressed together as though molding something out of clay. Or, more likely, C4.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· May 2

“Guys, think we should bother hiring a copy editor?” “Nah.” “Nah, nah.” “NA NA NA NAAAAAHH”

A screenshot of a Kotaku headline reading “Sony Set Pay [sic] $7.8 Million To PlayStation Users After Jude [sic] Approves Preliminary Settlement In PSN Digital Games Class Action Lawsuit”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 28

Without downloading anything new, where are you, mentally?

Irving from Severance, a graying man with a mustache and a sharp blue suit, says “Let’s burn this place to the ground”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 16

Here’s how it looks in Boost on iPad:

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 15

Seymour Skinner ponders whether he may be wrong about Catholic doctrine, then concludes that no, it is the FUCKING POPE who is wrong.

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 14

A cartoon of a That Fuckin Guy popping out of a well to say “I am very intelligent”

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 11

Integrity, Houston: have you flushed your DNS cache
Integrity, Houston: Try turning it upside down?
Integrity, Houston: Can you confirm you have full connectivity vis a vis Satphone and electrical outlet?
Integrity, Houston: How much rice do you have onboard?

Joe Rybicki@joerybicki· Apr 10

You rock! Y'know, since ur already under the hood...I've been keeping a list of stuff to report, and just realized if I keep waiting until you don't have other stuff to deal with it'll just get longer. So, attaching it as a photo. Items are roughly ranked by importance (to me!😁). All iPad/landscape