elder nephew: it tastes like dust. me: you are not making me want to try this. sister: just try smelling it first. me: it smells... like an old book. younger nephew: come on, try it! me: it tastes... like an old book.

who wore it better?

...what

thanks so much to @warmleatherette.com for giving Mystery this cat tree ❤️

hmmm

if you look like this DM me

happy dependence day, perverts. give me your money 🖤

bruh wtf why does the villain from season 4 of Farscape look just like me how did I never realize this before

got my ass

this curry was fucking incredible

I've successfully converted @luxalptraum.com into a Farscape fan, none of you are safe

thanks, doll 😘

so true bestie

I just call 'em like I see' em 😉

bruh multiple people who have hooked up with me said that this pokémon looks like me, mostly because of the hair 😭

it often just comes off like

re: "you may be remembered forever as the president who brought about America's humiliation"

like 5 different people have stopped me to compliment and/or photograph my shirt 😅

going to the

I'm bisexual

me rn

oh, I'm a perfect balance of the extremely hot and competent one who is a mess in her personal life and the not-really-human queer one? what a shock

me rn

POV: you have surrendered just a little bit more of your autonomy to me

When did your obsession with hot toxic women begin?