Paul Riddell

@kyloboomhauer

New project: The Annals of St. Remedius Medical College. What Dallas could have been…if we had teacup hodag breeders, exoparasitic pikas, endurance karaoke competitions, and earwax vampires.

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Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 13d

The title antagonist from “Predator” (1987)

The title character from “The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms”: a Rhedosaurus running amok in New York.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 14d

“Fiftysomething Sex Pest Banned From Local Anime Convention.”

Columnist Ross Douthat, presumably being told his mother is selling the house, he’ll have to move out at the end of the month, and the new owner will NOT let him stay in the basement for free.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 14d

Parker the 10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant (left) and Winston the Flame-Point Doorstop (right)

Photo of two Siamese cats: Parker, a lynx-point squatting in exasperation, and Winston, a flame-point stretched out like old chewing gum on a hot car seat.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 17d

The Postcard Liberation Front continues: a big fat stack of postcards goes out tomorrow morning. If you want one of your own: stremedius.com/2026/05/08/p...

A large stack of 1980s, 1990s, and 2000s postcards, with a “Tyrannosaurus Tex” card in the forefront.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 17d

I only discovered two months ago that I can wear my glasses while in the Kylo Boomhauer rig. Years of tripping and bumping in dark clubs…gone, and I’m furious with myself.

A portrait of the Roamer known as “Kylo Boomhauer” (archive photo: St. Remedius Medical College)

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· 17d

Post a perfect album from the 90s.

CD cover for the Cricket Taylor Band album "Let Me Lead You To Sin."

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jul 9

Latest news update on Mitch McConnell:

A scene from George Romero’s “Day of the Dead” (1985), of a battered newspaper reading “THE DEAD WALK!”

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jul 7

RULES FOR MY BLUESKY ACCOUNT NUMBER ONE:

A yellow sign reading "BIOHAZARD
INFECTED SPECIMEN
"If Container is Breached,
Contact Local Health Authorities"

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jul 7

Meanwhile, good afternoon from Dallas. Have a burgundy okra bloom. (If you’d told me 5 years ago that I’d enjoy eating okra, I’d have gotten a net, but my whole digestive process changed after my appendix burst 3 years ago. Now, I enjoy growing okra even more than eating it.)

A bright yellow with burgundy center okra bloom, smack in the center of an okra plant big enough to block out the sun.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 30

For all the technoweenies masturbating like caged apes over Harlan Ellison’s “I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream” and KW Jeter’s “Dr. Adder,” yelling “This! This is the world we need right now!”

An illustration of two bookcases. The first one, packed solid, has a sign above it reading “Science Fiction.” The other, empty save for some cobwebs, has a sign reading “Science Fiction That Tech Oligarchs Understand Correctly.”

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 28

John Waters and Divine did not promulgate and propagate a hairstyle essential to the punk movement so you could tell me AI is “inevitable.”

Divine in the John Waters film “Female Trouble” (1974) in a prison coverall, neck chain and handcuffs, and a brilliant black Mohawk.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 28

George Romero and his crew did not find whole new uses for Bosco chocolate syrup so you could tell me AI is “inevitable.”

From left to right, George A. Romero, Marilyn Eastman (sitting), Judith Riley, Karl Hardman, and Kyra Schon, armed with a can of black paint and a smaller can of Bosco chocolate syrup, all the better to simulate blood in a black-and-white movie.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 27

My cat is broken.

Parker the 10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant, lying down in his favorite position: head and forelegs twisted 180 degrees from the direction of his hind legs. (Not featured: his purring being so loud that it sounds like snoring.)

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 24

Who the hell copied my Tinder profile?

A segment from a pulp Western novel, reading "...in town. He just didn't fit in. Preacher was all muscle and bone and gristle. He was tanned dark by the sun and the wind, he carried the scars of a dozen deadly battles, and he operated under no moral or legal code save that of his own. And nobody was going to make him conform to any standard except that which he considered fair. But in his own peculiar way, Preacher was a highly moral man for the time, this year of our Lord, eighteen hundred and forty. he had the utmost respect for womanhood. He loved the land and the critters on it. He could not abide injustice. He didn't like lawyers and thought the country in general was going to Hell in a handbasket."

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 22

Okay, the post I've had crash my phone four times yesterday, so let's try it again: out on the bike trip (56 kilometers to help me further acclimate to the heat), and it's snapping turtle nesting season, with this young female heading back to her pond via this drainage ditch.

The center of a grassy drainage ditch in North Texas, with a young female common snapping turtle (Chelydra serpentina) crawling in the water at the bottom.

A young female common snapping turtle (Chelydra serpentina) at the bottom of a drainage ditch, most likely having just finished laying eggs and heading back to the pond at the end of the ditch.

A relative closeup of the head and foreshell of a young female common snapping turtle (Chelydra serpentina): she was stressed enough seeing me galumphing down to get photos, and I wasn't about to stress her further by picking her up. After I left, she got to the pond at the end of this drainage ditch without incident.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 22

Parker: "The 10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant."

Parker the lynx-point Siamese, completely unconscious in one of his rare periods where he isn't screaming to be let outside.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 20

At the Reflecting Pool, and guys, this doesn’t look right.

A scene from George Romero’s “Land of the Dead” (2005), with dozens of zombies emerging from a night-shrouded river.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 19

You mean he can be vocal other than hissing “You cannot kill what doesss not live!”?

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 19

See you and raise you:

Parker the 10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant, flat on his side and loudly snoring.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 19

Spotted in the reflecting pool:

A shot from the “The Raft” sequence from “Creepshow 2” (1987), featuring a woman covered with tar-like slime.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 18

For once, my phone actually manages to capture astronomical wonder.

A crescent moon in the Dallas evening sky, with the planet Venus below and to the right of it.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 14

I kid: THIS is setting up my group chat on bsky.

Joe Pilato as Captain Rhodes in George Romero’s “Day of the Dead,” meeting his number one fans up front and in person before they rip his legs off and eat them.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 14

Setting up my group chat on bsky

Either a production still of the ghoul hordes in “Night of the Living Dead” or St. Remedius Medical College fans, whomever are hungrier.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 9

Good afternoon.

A large turtle, species uncertain, at the edge of a slow-moving Texas stream.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 8

One week from now on Twitch: the St. Remedius Feline Thunderdome, starring Parker and Winston! Details very soon: stremedius.com/campus-and-o...

Parker the 10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant (left) and Winston the Living Doorstop (right) in a no-holds-barred catfight, live on Twitch TV! Get your tickets NOW!

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 5

Make a Doctor Who title less scary

The lost Fifth Doctor episode “Black Daisy”

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 4

Time for "Prove That Your Bookcase Isn't Color-Coded": "After more than five decades as an insufferable asshole, Paul Riddell says he's ready to leave the daily shitposting grind behind and explore deeper questions."

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 4

10-Kilo Lint-Covered Breast Implant displaying his usual impeccable grace and demureness by flopping on his back and spreading his legs as far as they'll go.

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 3

There's a reason why I prefer carnivorous plants to people these days, and not just because Sarracenia are inherently beautiful:

A fresh bloom from a North American white pitcher plant (Sarracenia leucophylla).

Paul Riddell@kyloboomhauer· Jun 1

This is cat checkpoint. Relinquish your latest cat picture on your phone.