Luke Winkie
@lukewinkie
Staff Writer, Slate. It's all gonna work out this time.
Wrote about Hasan Piker, who is officially a main character in mainstream political culture, and has a real chance to transform the Democratic Party — or, perhaps, doom it in the midterms.
Late-period Armond White is so good. Just completely unhinged and fully radicalized. Asmongold-style ideas filtered through the prose of a highfalutin film critic. No one will ever do it like him again.
I wrote about Francesca Hong’s anti-Thanksgiving position, and my theory that, these days, all DSA-backed candidates can and should disavow their most overheated 2020-era takes and nobody will hold it against them.
Ever since I moved into an elevator building I’ve learned the unwritten rule that you must always, *always* let any children in the chamber push the buttons — or risk a meltdown. Made me want to write a quick little story about that dynamic.
I have long been fascinated by the fact that nobody plays Monopoly by the printed rules in the rulebook — which allegedly make the game much faster and more fun. Talked to some Monopoly heads about it and played a round myself to see if we’ve been treating the world’s most hated board game unfairly.
On more than one occasion over the last few years I have watched a canceled celebrity resurface in an upsetting, diminished way that immediately reminds me of the End of Tár, which I believe is the defining movie scene of our time. Wrote about it!
Wrote about Erling Haaland, the goofball winner of the World Cup, and the antidote to the manosphere.
Update on Jordan Peterson’s fake university, currently offering a $1,776 discount.
I embedded with a nuisance trapper, I took a trip to one of those hunting grounds.And I kept asking the same question. What do we really mean when we say an alligator is a nuisance? And how do we live in parallel with things that terrify us, even if they're not as dangerous as we fear?
The process is pretty violent. And after they're apprehended, those gators are often sold to enclosed hunting grounds, where they can be hunted all over again -- this time by a roving bachelor party that has paid for the privilege.
I give you 8,000 words on Florida's Nuisance Alligator Program, a system in which Floridians can call a hotline to report a gator they believe is acting threatening. A licensed trapper will then arrive to yank the offending gator out of the place it has taken residence, so it may be "harvested."
I took a trip to the Alamo Drafthouse and tried out their new QR ordering system, which forces you to take out your phone in the middle of the movie, which — no matter what the company says — fills you with an overwhelming feeling of *wrongness.*
I took a trip to one of the last-ever Beach Boys shows, a band that now consists of only one original member -- the eternally controversial Mike Love. I wanted to witness the end of an American institution. Unsurprisingly, it's ending badly.
I was in Florida recently and I had to drop by Trump National Doral Miami to see the giant gold Trump statue. It got me thinking apocalyptically about all the different buildings/monuments/arches the president is desperate to engrave his name upon.
Had to quickly blog about the obviously-fake Knicks fandom of Donald Trump, a man who does not like sports.
If you were reading a lot of Pitchfork in the 2012-2014 range this name will take you out.
I wrote about Sean Duffy's reality show, which sure looks to be funded by a bunch of corporate interests, and is perfectly representative of the clammy, low-rent nature of Trump 2.0 corruption.
I’ve always been curious about how @willsommer.bsky.social does his job, and how he built up his insane encyclopedic fluency in right wing media. So I interviewed him about it!
Photo my wife sent me of her doing white wine, leftover Keens Chophouse, and Civ 6. Peak zen…
Also this is what the “shrimp linguine alfredo” looked like, and what my friend looked like after eating it
Had a couple parting thoughts on the most recent Trump assassination attempt, which basically boil down to, “Normal people are weird now.”
This is the “ordering matrix” that opens up the verboten secrets for how one can order Red Lobster’s forbidden shrimp dishes as part of Endless Shrimp…
Endless Shrimp — the all-you-can-eat promotion that helped bankrupt Red Lobster two years ago — is back. I took a trip to the restaurant to witness the carnage firsthand, with the assistance of some hilarious internal Red Lobster documents that one employee was kind enough to send me.