Maxxy

@maxdoesnotexist

40 is the new 25 Transformers, Magic, and other assorted nerdery

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Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 14d

We literally JUST had a major movie this summer about the dangers of granting "every" wish

One Wish Willow (from the movie "Obsession")

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 14d

Marvel editorial already settled on Spider-Men, but it might be different if they're both supposed to be the same person.

Cover for Marvel comic "The Spectacular SPIDER-MEN", featuring both Spider-Man (Peter Parker) and Spider-Man (Miles Morales) swinging through the city

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 18d

"Apple sauce, bitch!"

Matt Damon holding a shotgun with Ben Afleck on the set of Good Will Hunting 2: Hunting Season

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 19d

Evergreen

Tweet from wint (@dril)
"and another thing: im not mad. please dont put in the newspaper that i got mad."

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 24d

Oh my...

Astoria Carlton-Ritz looking up with an awe-filled expression

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· 27d

Do we know their opinion on Easy-Bake?

Easy-Bake Oven and Snack Center - Classic Light Bulb Oven

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Jun 7

I should have known @coolzonemedia.bsky.social was in the pocket of Big Cornhole

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Jun 4

I couldn't believe my ears

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Jun 2

Claiming this is the guy with energy "at all hours of the day"

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· May 25

Low effort but I couldn't resist

The "Sheen/Ultraman/7th week in a row" meme format, but it's Trump presenting a deal with Iran

Panel 1: Sheen is holding up something in front of the class
Caption "This is A DEAL WITH IRAN"

Panel 2: Mrs Fowl giving a concerned look from her desk
Caption "TRUMP... this is the 7th week in a row you've shown A DEAL WITH IRAN"

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· May 11

Silver Myr had always been the gold standard in my head.

Silver Myr (2)
(Mirrodin printing)
Artifact Creature — Myr
T: Add (U) to your mana pool.
*The vedalken saw the myr as toys, unaware of the intelligence lurking behind their empty eyes.*
Art: Kev Walker
1/1

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· May 9

Mighty Morphin'

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 26

They're always trying to reinvent the wheel.

Tim Curry as "The Butler" and Martin Mull as "Colonel Mustard" in the movie Clue (1985)

Panel 1: "I'm merely a humble butler."
Panel 2: "What exactly do you do?"
Panel 3: "I buttle, sir."

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 24

I want one of these but done like the one from the Arena Duskmourn table

A screenshot from MTG Arena, featuring a "table" (background art) set in a living room from Duskmourn

Close up of the previous pic, zoomed in to highlight the road-map rug in which the roads trace out the shape of a moth, Valgavoth's symbol in the world.

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 21

"We are in danger of producing an educated proletariat. That's dynamite!"

Later in the 1970s, Roger Freeman — a key educational adviser to Nixon then working for the reelection of California governor Ronald Reagan — spelled out quite precisely what the conservative counter attack was aimed at preventing: "We are in danger of producing an educated proletariat. That's dynamite! We have to be selective on the we allow to go through higher education. If not we will have a large number of highly trained and unemployed people." The two most menacing institutional sources of the same described by Freeman were obviously those two great public university systems charging no tuition: the University of California and the City University of New York. Governor Reagan was able to wipe out free tuition at the University of California.

Source: Vietnam and Other Fantasies, by H Bruce Franklin

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 19

Went 4-0 at a Strixhaven prerelease with a pretty nice Prismari pile

A pretty decent spread of Prismari cards, but no real bombs

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 18

I couldn't get out last night, but I'm ready to crack a few packs today!

Magic: the Gathering
Secrets of Strixhaven
Prismari Prerelease

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 10

I just went for a walk in the Cheyenne mountains. THIS is what the first service is for. This is what we're going to lose. Fucking tragic.

A mountain range full of trees under a partly cloudy sky

A wide vista of forested mountains, framed by a well maintained trail and fence

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 8

Best Star Trek crew, wrong answers only

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Apr 1

It's not in the daily deals but Flubs cosmetics and the damaged card sleeve are also up for April Fools

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Mar 30

Book cover for "Turtles All The Way Down" by John Green (black text over an orange spiral design)

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Mar 19

It's way more ominous when it happens at night

An empty stroller sitting at the curb next to an empty street

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Mar 16

What's even the point of pre-queueing?

Welcome to the
Secret Lair Lounge
Expected arrival time on the website: more than an hour PST
Your estimated wait time is: more than an hour

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Mar 16

Honestly this could be applied at any point during either term

Screenshot of Shaun's post, cutoff so only the first two lines are showing:

"the contradictory talking points coming out of the trump admin rn are making the US look absurd."

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Mar 15

Someone who knows more about Final Fantasy please tell me what this attack does

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Feb 27

He's really excited to do a Fastball Special with this

Wolverine's Magic card:

Wolverine, Best There Is // 1RG
(full card art depicting Wolverine leaping, claws out, across a snowy landscape)
Legendary Creature — Mutant Berserker Hero
/Unrivaled Lethality/ — Double all damage Wolverine would deal.
At the beginning of each end step, is Wolverine dealt damage to another creature this turn, put a +1/+1 counter on him.
1G: Regenerate Wolverine. /(The next time he would be destroyed this turn, instead tap him, remove him from combat, and heal all damage on him.)/
2/2

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Feb 25

Box art for Transformers: Combiner Wars Devastator (six green and purple construction trucks that combine to form one giant green and purple robot)

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Feb 6

It's simple, really

KNOW THE WORK RULES

APPROPRIATE-
Man 1: (handsomely) Pretti deserved to be shot
Woman: (swooning) Aww, you're sweet

INAPPROPRIATE-
Man 2: (with pimples) Kirk deserved to be shot
Woman: (panicked) HELLO, HUMAN RESOURCES?!

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Feb 2

Even in the uncropped image, I don't understand how anyone can look at this and empathize with the masked agent over the guy on his knees crying. Especially with the red-tinged flag behind them, it's really clear who the villain is here, and it's not Alex.

Screenshot of the illinirepublicans Instagram post featuring a stylized image of Alex Pretti on his hands and knees in front of a masked government agent holding a gun to Pretti's back. They are standing in front of a seemingly blood soaked American flag. The caption reads in all caps: "ONLY TRAITORS HELP INVADERS"

Maxxy@maxdoesnotexist· Jan 27

This woman is 54 years old now, what the hell