Alex Abbott

@partlyalex

Puns. Reds, Colts, Pacers, Caps fan. Autism tweets. Jokes! I'm "JoeyVottoIsGone" on FG. Views? My own. He/him.

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Alex Abbott@partlyalex· 7d

Surely a coincidence seeing these two posts next to each other:

First picture: "Washington Commanders WR 1on1s, in order of appearance in the video:

Dyami Brown
Jaylin Lane
Bunch of other guys, that's not the point of this post"

Second picture: "Schultz: Expectations around the league is that Stefon Diggs will end up with the Commanders."

Alex Abbott@partlyalex· Jul 8

Former Reds General Manager Walt Jocketty uses a fork to dip a green bean into a cup of Dr. Pepper

Alex Abbott@partlyalex· May 6

This hasn't been posted yet but it's one of my all-time favorite jokes:

Title: "Another Dang Garfield Cartoon." A man named Jon Arbuckle says, "Garfield you ate all the food, you are so lazy." A cat named Garfield says, "Fuck you, Jon." Then Jon says, "You too, Garfield." And it's a picture of a cat sitting on the floor next to President James A. Garfield laying on the floor eating a tray of lasagna. President Garfield says, "Shut up, Jon, I'll do what I want to." Garfield the cat says, "Give me some of that lasagna." Garfield the President says, "No way." Garfield the cat says again, "Give me that goddamn lasagna!" Garfield the President: "No!" Garfield the President in the next panel says, "Get your own lasagna, Garfield." In that same panel, Garfield the cat says, "Don't you mean..." In the next panel, Garfield the cat says, "Charles Guiteau!" and then in the last panel you can see Garfield the cat eating the lasagna while Garfield the President is bleeding out on the floor next to a gun.

Alex Abbott@partlyalex· Feb 13

Only one person can investigate this properly....

Former Cincinnati Reds first baseman Joey Votto wearing a red Canadian Mounted Police (Mountie) outfit with a Mountie-style hat while holding a microphone during an interview with MLB media

Alex Abbott@partlyalex· Aug 25

This man should also be investigated for committing fraud in the state of Georgia in 2021. How can you go 21 innings in a playoff series against the Atlanta Braves and not score a run? That's criminally fraudulent in my heart.

Alex Abbott@partlyalex· Aug 24

Elly De La Cruz can hit well, run well, and plays great defense. He can also sap the baseball-playing ability of his competition by touching them. Fear him.