Pete Kotz
@petekotz
Still searching for my redeeming quality, which got lost at the airport in 2019.
It's hard to believe that Andy Ogles, star of the hit drama "Jesus' Heavily Armed Christmas," would be betrayed by his apostles.
Say what you will about Katie Miller, but she's been critical to the resurrection of the Eva Braun joke. I for one am grateful.
Sam Altman isn't offering much in exchange for the eco nightmare he's about to inflict upon us.
The latest version of trickle down economics is going to be way more fabulous than the original! It's hard to believe no one thought of this before!
Helpful volunteers offer directions to the annual Cuyahoga County Republican Picnic here in Cleveland so no one accidentally stumbles into a non-pedophile protector picnic.
Sarah Huckabee Sanders takes a bold stance against non-existent threats. A leader for our times.
If only Pete Hegseth would have stuck to fronting a boy band that was huge on the tween birthday party circuit.
JD Vance has turned debasement into the highest form of performance art. He is the Rembrandt of ass kissing.
Move this to the roof of the new White House ballroom and the world would whimper with envy.
It would have been ultimate MAGA to have Air Force One land in the Bahamas with Trump immediately deported.
In the fevered race between corruption and incompetence, Kristi Noem is still near the top of the leader board.
Arguably the most savage part of America right now: Doctors playing roulette with mothers' lives out of fear they'll go to prison for performing an emergency abortion.
Making severely injured veterans wait months to see a doctor doesn't feel like we're making America very great again.
To the guy in the White House who conceived this: St. Peter awaits you with a broken piece of rebar and Old Testament vengeance on his mind.
During these trying times, what the country needs most is an opulent ballroom the country will be barred from ever setting foot in. Thanks, Mr. President!
The most American store ever. Starks Liquor in Prairie Du Chien, Wisconsin, where the guns are conveniently located above the liquor for your shopping pleasure.
Breaking news: "Satan Announces Layoffs of Entire Research and Developing Team, Saying He'll Just Copy Whatever UnitedHealthcare is Doing."
The Trump administration may be incompetent in all matters governance, but its thieving skills demand respect.
Secretary of War Pete Hegseth pauses plans to attack Jamaica, admitting his new White Claw Missile in development is no match for the arsenal of the Jamaican Armed Forces.
The monument to Irving Marchenko, the plastic surgeon who invented Mar-a-Lago Face, in the hills of Palm Beach.
If Donald Trump was Jesus, the Bible would be 1,200 pages of non-stop whining, with intermittent bragging about how he won the Masters.