raoul puke (@raoulpuke) · DIRTY

raoul puke

@raoulpuke

scared weird little guy ~ bipolar brain and failing body ~ retired fssw, public health worker, and master of none ~ all tizz, no rizz ~ he 🏳️‍⚧️

315 Following251 Followers925 Posts

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raoul puke@raoulpuke· 3d

Lemme try something

A painting of the word ‘tits’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· 13d

Waiting to see how many consecutive shifts my bad support worker will be significantly late for

Simpsons screengrab from the softball episode. Burns: ‘Seven misfortunes, there’s an outside chance. But nine misfortunes? I’d like to see that.’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· 20d

Perfectly serviceable bachelor chow

A black and white bowl on a kitchen bench with spice jars in the background. The bowl contains a fork sticking into a scoop of white risotto.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· 27d

Happy Wrensday

A pair of bright blue splendid fairy wrens perched close together on a branch

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 8

It’s like that scene from E.T.

Several adorable little animals lined up on a grey bed: a red panda, a Charmander, and a little torbie cat. Two of them are stuffies.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· May 25

Last vacay day, now making our way slowly home. I’m looking forward to seeing (in order of appearance) my cats, girlfriend, and other loved ones

Selfie. A bald white man in a grey swim shirt, holding a Tiger beer, stands smiling in a swimming pool with the Indian Ocean and a small island in the background. It’s a stunning sunny day.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· May 23

Ruh roh lmao

Screenshot of item tracker message: ‘Keys left behind. This item is no longer detected near you. It was last seem near Indian Ocean.’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Apr 23

Home safe from my little adventure! I am smoking a joint and patting my cats (file photo) and all is well

A petite torbie cat and a larger ginger tabby who is missing a hind leg are curled closely together on a grey sofa with a plush blue blanket under them. They are both unbearably cute, and they clearly love each other.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Apr 5

Seems needlessly threatening but ok

Text: You’ve read your last free article.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Apr 4

Sunrise over An Bang Beach, Hoi An

Joggers silhouetted against the pre-dawn beach glow

A bright red sun rises over the beach, reflected in the water. Families play in the water

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Mar 26

Simpsons meme. Tobias (as Lyle Lanley) teaches MATE = CUNT and CUNT = MATE on a chalkboard.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Mar 19

Look at this good borb

An Indochinese green magpie

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Mar 1

The American spelling of ‘mommy kink’ is very important for clarity

Simpsons screengrab. Soccer Mummy scene. ‘Uh-oh, the professor said not to let him get a boner.’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Feb 22

Jokes they couldn’t make now probably

Simpsons screengrab. ‘Hey kid, you look good with that cigarette—kind of sophisticated.’

Simpsons screengrab. ‘Oh, God, I love to smoke.’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Feb 2

have a postimpressionist-type nude

A pointillist-style acrylic painting of a huge-assed nude blonde woman on a green background.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jan 3

*Tea Party voice*

[cat food treat] TEMPTATIONS

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Dec 28

Something I put together yesterday

Acrylic painting: simple caricature-style self portrait on a pale blue and green background. A balding bearded white man smokes a jazz cigarette while pills explode from his open skull. His expression is serene. He has a wonky third eye between his brows.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Dec 28

An old tweet: ‘Found something new to say when I leave a room.’ Photo of a product called Stay Fresh Cheese Bags.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Dec 26

20 hours later: it was on the floor between two boxes. I wasn’t losing my mind. Bad Charlie

A big joint that has visibly been chewed by a cat.

The doofus orange who definitely committed every crime in this household.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Dec 18

I made this giant painstakingly hand-painted Simpsons frame for my bestie for xmas

Acrylic painting of a Simpsons scene. Mr Burns is eating candy on a plush rug and answering the phone.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Nov 29

Simpsons meme. Kirk being fired from the cracker factory. Text: Maybe allistic people eat nuggs; we don’t know. Frankly, we don’t want to know. It’s a market we could do without.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Nov 9

Look at these little creatures I met at yoga

A photo from behind and shoulders down of a medium-build white man with tattooed arms, wearing sweats and kneeling on a purple yoga mat. A tiny Tonkinese kitten peers from beneath his butt.

A selfie focusing on the lap of a tattooed white man in a tshirt and grey sweats. Two tiny Tonkinese kittens are curled up in his lap. One looks toward the camera with blue eyes.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Nov 4

Simpsons screengrab meme. Krusty enthusiastically announces: Cheney’s dead!

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Nov 4

Mr Burns ass scheme

Elon Musk on Twitter: ‘A large solar-powered AI satellite constellation would be able to prevent global warming by making tiny adjustments in how much solar energy reached Earth’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Oct 27

Speaking of drag, ideal place to cut off this sentence lol

Screenshot of a fb ad featuring a drag king. Text: Ever wanted to become a Drag King? No…

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 22

One more self-portrait from the hospital. I’m home now and much less miserable

A pencil and ink sketch with watercolour. Self-portrait. A bony bald shirtless man with distorted features entangled in IV lines.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 16

The butterfly meme. ‘Nurses’ is regarding ‘every surface in a patient’s room’ and saying ‘Is this a garbage bin for me?’

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 15

Self-portrait in hospital

A pencil and watercolour sketch. Face and shoulders portrait of a thin balding man with distorted features attached to an IV.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 11

This beeping piece of shit is getting named in my suicide note

A hospital IV driver machine, displaying OCCLUDED and with the red alarm light on.

raoul puke@raoulpuke· Jul 9

When you walk into my house

Pikachu in a Pokémon game screengrab. It says: Pikachu noticed the Weed.