Sparky Clarkson

@sparkyclarkson

oh mighty shai-hulud, keeper of balance bless the maker and his water bless the coming and going of him may his passing delete your account

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Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jul 27

a viral tumblr post from pesonsonable
"me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I'M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU"
reply from miaislying:
"Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?"
personsonable:
"decay exists as an extant form of life"
miaislying:
"That's a terrifying answer, have a nice day"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jul 26

jumpscare! at the shops

Image of a shop named "Fanloli". Presumably this is selling merchandise related to the Filoli house and gardens, but even with that context this is, um, not a great name.

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jul 11

The villainous Hugo Drax from the Bond movie Moonraker, along with the text of a tweet from Elon Musk that reads "You don't seem to understand that SpaceX will be worth more than the rest of Earth if we accomplish our goals"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jul 1

Kids' sports:

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jun 25

yes, it's dunkin's loaded hash browns
i did not take this photo and have no idea who did, but thank you random internet person for allowing me to make this incredibly stupid joke

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Jun 5

everybody's favorite six-breasted gal Yarna d'al'Gargan

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· May 28

There is exactly one good mission, in which a sorceress trapped in a painting tells you to go after an evil witch enemy -- who has actually been built up in previous story beats -- by smashing creepy totems and freeing wizards trapped in giant pots while fighting samurai golems made of clay pots.

Chef Gordon Ramsay saying, "delicious. Finally, some good fucking food"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· May 23

a fake title card for Star Trek: the Next Generation showing the Enterprise-D with its wide rear configuration, and the title text "Baby got Back"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· May 23

y'all,

a screenshot from the Steam store showing "LGBTQ+ games" being recommended because of my "recent playtime in other LGBTQ+ games". On the right is a promotional image from Life Is Strange: Reunion and on the left is a promotional image for NBA 2K26 featuring WNBA players

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· May 23

A fake title card for Star Trek: The Next Generation with a shot of the Enterprise D and the text "The One Where Beverly Fucks a Candle Ghost"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Apr 29

just trying to get hired by the harris campaign

an incredibly lazy photoshop of the now-famous "8647" seashell photo taken by James Comey, in which the 8 and 4 have been hastily pasted over to generate an instance of the 6-7 meme, which the harris campaign briefly employed for some kind of political website thing that evaporated instantly into irrelevance.
The "creator" of this low-effort and quite stupid image, if you wish to call him that, is implying that his total absence of graphical ability, lack of insight into youth culture, and inability to read the political moment make him an ideal employee for Harris' sure-to-be-disastrous run in 2028

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Apr 26

An image of Geralt of Rivia from The Witcher III: The Wild Hunt. Geralt is looking into the camera and smiling slightly. It is night, and he is wearing tinted glasses, perhaps so that he can keep track of the visions in his eyes.

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Apr 11

Joker nothing, y'all about to make me become Megatron

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Mar 29

A haggard and disheveled Nigel (from RDR2) stares in disbelief at a tweet from Alien Super Show quoting Gavin Newsom as saying he is in favor of compulsory service,

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Mar 27

Do I have any mutuals who know enough about SQL to extract text from a saved wordpress db or three so that I can avoid learning enough sql to do this?

Homer Simpson thinking "Money can be exchanged for goods and services." The implication is that I am willing to pay for this.

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Mar 14

A panel from a Batman comic where instead of saying "Kite Man" contemplatively the goddamn Batman instead says "The Woke Ginger."

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Feb 28

A handy tool for all you youngsters embarking on your first watch after experiencing the numerous homages...

The opening image from Twin Peaks with the fake title : "Oh Hey! Now I get that reference!"

Sparky Clarkson@sparkyclarkson· Feb 26

I gave ATLAS FALLEN a chance but gave up on it after a few hours. You know, if I had a nickel for every game I'd played where a piece of talking armgear gave me magic jumping and parkour powers...