rat dad

@splinterhamato

hey im rat dad I love cosplay & animating/editing but I mostly tweet anime bullshit. Asuka amv guy. Masters degree in Sephiroth (seriously). Leftist. Largely ffxiv & giant robots. Also trigun 💖 @eepysleepy.bsky.social kaenan|31|they/he|transmasc lesbian

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rat dad@splinterhamato· 26d

fuck yeah

A bluesky notification informing me that the post to which I am replying has been liked by “THE Eridan Locator.” (and also my friend Cat but that’s not relevant). This guy is 18 years old, meaning that when homestuck began he was one year old. When my mom made this eridan cape for my sister he was four. That’s so sweet and beautiful to me. I’m so glad teens are enjoying homestuck in the year of our lord 2026, just like I did as a teen. Makes me feel soft and warm. Shine on you crazy diamond.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jul 10

BIG NEWS: the fabulous illustrator who left this incredible surprise on my windshield has some original characters of their own! If you like to draw & this post made you smile, consider maybe joining me in doing a doodle of one of their OCs! I want to share some joy with them in return! Here’s some:

This character is a cutesy griffon drawn entirely in colored pencil. They have the body of a feline or maybe canine and the face of a person, framed by cute spiky sweeps of hair that fall around their face in an almost owlish manner. They have just one turquoise eye, on their left (our right), and no visible nose, just a deep widow’s peak like an owl. They’re smiling a cute little kitty mouth 3 face and blushing blue and brown. They have little blue ears (or perhaps little feather tufts like a great horned owl) sticking up from their hair. They have a big fluffy tuft of green and turquoise fur or feathers on their chest, like a little ruff, and a fluffy fur-feather tail. They also have large turquoise bird wings folded politely against their back. There’s a groovy background pattern behind them of purple smiley faces, orange stars, blue diamonds, red hearts, yellow highlights, and turquoise heartbeat monitor lines, giving off the energy of a fun 1990s bowling alley carpet. I want to be friends with this little creature. I wanna see them skateboard.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jul 8

>spotted a paper on my windshield as i walked back to my car. >”motherfucker-“ >read it HELLO????? SOMEONE DREW MY CRINGEMOBILE AS A TFSONA???? THIS IS SO SWEET WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!

An extremely ominous piece of white paper, folded in half and tucked beneath the front windshield wiper of the noble 2013 Toyota Prius V, The Car of Kings. It looks like a parking ticket, but upon close inspection, the front reads “Open Me!! (Drawing not a car ticket)”. The exclamation points are pulling double duty as big anime eyes for a profoundly kawaii smiley face.

My hand holding the unfolded piece of paper, revealing a darling pencil drawing of my car, the cherished cringemobile, as a transformer in robot mode!! They have a decepticon decal on their left shoulder and extremely cutieful door wings!!! They have a visor for optics and are making a nonplussed expression, likely due to the Philly heat (as my wife’s favorite musical once put it: it’s hot-as-hell! in Phil-a-del! Phia!). To the right of the drawing there is a decepticon insignia, under which the artist has signed their name: Averie (which is apparently going very fast because it seems to be giving off speed lines and a dust cloud). They dated it with today’s date, 7-8-26, and included their TikTok: rag_d0oll. At the bottom is what is presumably a self portrait of Averie saying “Nice car” with a smiley face, revealing that the artist looks like if Zero from Drakengard had a scene phase, and also could experience joyful whimsy.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jul 6

context:

An incredible article in entertainment weekly entitled “Millie Bobby Brown believes she was a closeted gay soldier who was killed with a sword in a past life”. Fuck yeah tell us more. The subheading is: “The actress believes that a sword was pushed through her spine so that she was ‘completely paralyzed.’”
The article was written by Emlyn Travis, who has a finger on the pulse of the nation. It was published 3 days ago on July 3, 2026 at 2:46 p.m. ET. There’s a photo underneath of MBB herself, captioned “Millie Bobby Brown on May 13, 2026. Credit: Jamie McCarthy/Getty”. She is smiling knowingly, like the coy Mona Lisa, full of knowledge of eschewed homosexuality and tragic war deaths.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jul 6

THAT WAS THE FUNNIEST FIREWORKS SHOW I HAVE EVER HAD THE CONFUSION OF EXPERIENCING

Me, wearing a white top with lovely geometric embroidery along the neckline and peach pants, laying on a red white and blue picnic blanket on the sand. I am completely covered in explosive debris and gunpowder residue. I’m throwing up a peace sign despite my thousand yard stare. There is a piece of charred explosive on my forehead.

Shannon standing in front of a series of massive colorful explosions in the sky, but the entire right half of the photo is completely engulfed in smoke. They are grinning maniacally, arms outspread to embrace the madness.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 26

tjmaxx is one of the few retail establishments BRAVE enough to ask hardhitting questions like “what if this was pants?”

A photo of my reflection in the mirror of a tjmaxx dressing room. I am a white person with long brown hair, nerd glasses, and a hot pink Covid mask. I’m wearing a long sleeved flowy wrap-tie shirt crop-top thing with - somewhat garish orange and peach and purple pattern on it. I am simultaneously wearing an also-very-visually-busy white & peach & orange & blue & light green pair of pants that also have tropical patterns on them, but it’s totally different shades of those colors and a totally different tropical pattern. If you’re wondering “did you buy this outfit?” then you don’t know me at all. Of course I did.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 25

my son wears an awful lot of hot pink which somewhat dilutes his green-ness on most occasions, but that fact remains that he is, ultimately, an asparagus-tailed green bean

An absolutely stunning gpose that fluffy did of Delena, Aoibhe, and Quin’a chilling in a gazebo on Delena’s island, dressed in their swimsuits. Delena is a beautiful black moon-cat with red-to-yellow gradient locs pulled back into a high ponytail, highlighting their big fluffy red kitty ears. They’re wearing an adorable red-orange bikini that matches their hair, and beautiful chains of pearls as well as additional accent jewelry. They’re sitting on a bench in the gazebo turned to our right, with one leggie folded up on the bench demurely. They’re touching their chest and gazing gayly at Aoibhe. Aoibhe is sitting on the bench in the middle, making an excited double-fist-pump gesture. She is a grey-skinned moon-cat with Mhachi (Pictish) tattoos all over her body. She’s wearing a black bikini with gold trim and black tassel fringe, as well as an enormous light brown straw Sun hat with gold, purple, and white flowers affixed to it. She’s looking lovingly at Quin’a. Quin’a is sitting the right side of the bench, looking back at Aoibhe either bashfully or awkwardly-flirtatiously-cringely with one hand up rubbing the back of his head and his legs nonchalantly crossed at the ankle. He’s a peach-skinned moon-cat with medium-long green hair. He’s wearing a little green beach wrap top with pink tropical flower print that exposes his kitty titties but is tied at the waist. He’s also got black board-shorts swim trunks with hot pink trim. All three of them are very close and have their knees touching. Nya Nya!!!!

A screenshot of Quin’a, my warrior of light from ffxiv, smirking into the camera in that endless blue liminal space at the end of the universe. He’s a beige-skinnned moon-cat with medium-long green hair and kitty ears. He’s got one green eye and one orange eye. He’s wearing a drape-y green and black scoop-necked wrap dress with silver shoulder pieces and a lot of different textures of jewelry embellishing it. He’s also got a big gold gun strapped to his back. This was his classic shadowbringers-endwalker look before he bloomed into his hot pink era. It’s funny seeing him make a serious and kind of dark smirking expression like this because he’s usually just a silly goose. But beware.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 24

yeah man, these are definitely some of the first words that come to mind when I think of you

Touga Kiryuu from Utena introducing himself to Utena. He’s an anime bishie with long beautiful red hair. “I’m Touga Kiryuu, student council president and totally normal boy,” he says, non-suspiciously. For sure, dude.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 24

he drives me insane

A screenshot from episode 3 of utena. Utena and Anthy are standing in outdoor entryway to their school, framed by the deep black shadows of the school’s arches. Utena says to Anthy “I don’t want a bride.” (Press X to doubt).

A screenshot of the same scene from episode 3 of utena. Utena and Anthy are standing in outdoor entryway to their school, framed by the deep black shadows of the school’s arches. Utena says to Anthy “All I want it a totally normal boy!”.

“Hi there,” someone says, interrupting utena and Anthy. They turn to look. Touga is emerging from shadows, where he was leaning against a pillar with his arms crossed in a totally normal and non-sinister fashion.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 24

I think about this joke all the time

A post from threads, made on Valentine’s Day this year, by a gentleman named krickbrendan. It reads:

“Remembering an open mic in Pennsyltucky in 2011 when we had "offensive joke night." Everyone else said slurs, but I went up and talked about how "I don't support the troops. I do support the war though, because war is the number 1 killer of troops" and had to be escorted out of the building for my safety”.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 22

one of these things is not like the others one of these things just doesn’t belong

A screenshot of the “characters” filter dropdown list on ao3 for project Hail Mary fanfiction. It reads:

Characters

Ryland Grace (993)
Rocky (Project Hail Mary) (982)
Adrian (Project Hail Mary) (307)
Eva Stratt (111)
Original Eridian Characters (Project Hail Mary) (100)
The Convict | Simon (Iron Lung) (35)
Carl (Project Hail Mary 2026) (31)
The NannyBot | Armando (Project Hail Mary) (27)
Olesya Ilyukhina (21)

Astute readers may notice that SIMON FROM IRON LUNG IS NOT FROM THIS MOVIE??? WHY IS MARKIPLIER SUDDENLY THERE. WHY IS HE THERE THIRTY-FIVE TIMES.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 21

so many people miss the vitally important core moral message of this film

An edit of the gundam “war is bad” comic, in which originally a gundam is shooting a gun firing the words “WAR IS BAD” completely over someone’s head, while that onlooker says “wow, cool robot!”.

In my brilliant edit dissecting the themes and core messages of cinematic tour-de-force, james wan and akela cooper’s malignant (2021), a person looks at the movie poster for malignant, saying “this movie is not very good” while completely missing the core message of the film: “trans men have electricity powers”.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 21

oooo mr waters oooooo~

A screenshot of Thancred just hanging out sitting in the waking sands mid ARR. He’s slouched over and gazing intensely at nothing in particular. He’s got his regular white leather choker on, but underneath it he has now mysteriously added a certain black cord choker with several small dangling black pendants. “Wow, thancred’s acting so much less like a cringe playboy than usual today, maybe I was wrong about him,” the wol says to themself. “Maybe I should tap that-”.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 21

the 190 sheets of paper that make up this

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 19

me: “ahh my stupid gay son. get your ass down to eorzea and blow primals up for 4000 hours. ok.” masayoshi soken: [the best music ever written for a video game begins to play]

A warrior of light character inspiration graphic, as designed by lycorinne here on bluesky (who I am retweeting) and filled out by me. The big center picture is a screenshot of my player character from ffxiv, QUIN’a Sarkset, who is a pale keep of the moon miqo catboygirl with long green hair and little green kitty ears. He’s wearing pink nerd glasse, a hot pink saigaskin coat of aiming, and pint torrent sleeves. He’s doing the “wow!” emote where he leans forward with big sparkly eyes and brings his hands up to his chest in excited little fists. He’s standing in Lyhe Ghiah, the pretty pastel rainbow dream world of the pixies, so there are some yellow and pink flowers on the ground behind him and a big blue stained glass window.

Quin’a is surrounded by eight characters that are Just Like Him For Real:

1.) Charlie Kelly from it’s always sunny in Philadelphia. Quin’a is always doing Charlie Work.
2.) Ken, beach version, from the 2023 Barbie movie, as portrayed by Ryan Gosling. His job is just beach.
3.) Tim Brassington, the boyfriend from the 2025 horror movie Together. You should watch this movie (innocent smiley face).
4.) Glinda Upland from the musical Wicked. Not any particular version just the musical character in general.
5.) Mickey 17 from the movie of the same name, as portrayed by Robert Pattinson. I haven’t read the book.
6.) Greg, the little brother from over the garden wall.
7.) Ryland Grave from Prjoect Hail a Mary, as portrayed by Ryan Gosling. It’s weird that he’s on here twice. What does this mean. Also no I haven’t read this book either I am illiterate and only read video game yaoi.
8.) Jaune Arc from the web series RWBY. Little baby failboy princess getting put into the torture nexus.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 16

Shinji actually very narrowly beat out asuka for me!! Crazy work. Congratulations on being the Mortal Avatar Of Yaoi

My result for the neon genesis evangelion personality quiz. Shinji has the most, at 85%, followed closely by my forever girl asuka at 80%, then ritsuko and Rei both at 65%, Misael at 60%, kaworu at 50%, and Gendo coming in last at 45%. I need to be wifemaxxing more I guess.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 16

visited my parents’ house for the night and got jumpscared when I entered my childhood bedroom to discover this Troubling Tableau my mother had apparently constructed in my absence

A very weird photo of an eclectic pile of strange large objects in the corner of my childhood bedroom. You can tell it’s my childhood bedroom cuz it still has the same cutesy floral wallpaper with circus animal trim that my mom let me pick out in 1997. On the left is the body of my Diego Brando scary monsters dinosaurs fursuit with half of the padding removed so it’s just sort of laying there crotch-up with just the hips and thighs looking 3D. The legs are all deflated and skinny until they get down to the feet. In the center is a giant puppet of charlotte from madoka magica, staring directly at the camera (and also directly at where I sleep). Her big pale face is about three feet in diameter and her huge rainbow eyes are locked on the viewer, just above her massive teeth. On the right is an enormous plush of my son Michelangelo, who’s like four feet tall. He is an adorable turtle boy with an orange ninja mask and, for some reason, a red Christmas scarf with ornaments on it??? The person who gave him to me is Jewish. He had a green squid hat on his head, creating an unintentional homage to the treacherous kraang. He has a tiny penguin wearing a rainbow necklace on his lap and he’s sitting on a pink rose pillow. There’s a Raphael plush next to him but it’s in a totally different art style and only about as tall as his shin. There’s also a dream catcher visible on the far left that I got from a pow wow in Montana in 2003. I wish I remembered what nation it was from, I’ll have to ask my mom. Anyway it’s a very weird pile of stuff on a bed.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 16

pov: the owl from ocarina of time is lusting after your ice cream

A photograph from my own point of view lying on the couch. The foreground is a very close up bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Just beyond the bowl, on my lap, is ragamuffin, my parents’ big fluffy brown Norwegian forest cat. Or maybe she’s a Maine coon? Who knows, she’s adopted from a shelter and she is a cat. Anyway she is big and brown and fluffy with a white chin and white chest. Her whiskers are white and droop down like Dr. Eggman’s mustache. She has green eyes and is staring directly at me, squinting. She desires my cream.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 16

gorb…..

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 15

JDHJDFJFJF THIS IS A CRAZY NAME AND LOGO FOR A TRANSFORMERS-THEMED PUBLISHER

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 15

please be patient with my stupid daughter. he is a trans nb lesbian who doesn’t know what’s going on

a somewhat grainy screenshot of my warrior of light, Quin’a, smiling and making heart hands at the camera. He is a moon cat miqo with peach skin and lime green hair and ears. He’s wearing cherry pink saigaskin robe of aiming with the torrent sleeves, his usual fit. He also has pink nerd glasses because his eyesight leaves something to be desired. A guileless beast.

I need to put more screenshots of this guy on my phone.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 14

i have a bunch of episodes of hellsing ultimate on my harddrive that were apparently saved on december 31st 1979

Screenshot of a list of m4v video files of ten episodes of Hellsing Ultimate. The first nine of them of them all say they were, somewhat improbably, saved at December 31st 1979 at 11PM. And then just episode ten is from July 4th 2025 at 2:58pm for some reason, which seems more likely, but also raises new different questions.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 14

like, this is a good blind box, because no matter who you get, you get to take home a beloved friend!! or thancred!!

The 6 possible figures hidden inside the first round of ffxiv chibi blind boxes. They are extremely adorable little figures of sage alphinaud, endwalker outfit alisaie, shadowbringers urianger, endwalker raha, shadowbringers shtola, and shadowbringers thancred. I have all of these on my bedside table right now because I need to be within 3 feet of an Alphinaud effigy at all times or my life force starts fading.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 11

peep my sausage

Me (a white 30 year old brunette with a baby face and nerd glasses, wearing all black) sitting in a tan pleather chair and pointing down at a rotund miniature poodle sitting on my lap. His name is teddy. He is strawberry blonde and wearing a red collar. We are chillin in a yellow-painted living room, in front of glass doors leading out onto a patio from which the sand and water of the bay is visible in the distance. I don’t really like dogs but I like this little tater cuz he’s chill as fuck.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 10

love weird bootleg anime figures on the nj boardwalk cuz they got shit u never seen. sometimes it’s just shitty versions of real figures n it’s like ok whatever but then sometimes it’s 20 pokemon as huge bara dudes. Sometimes it’s demon slayer hentai. Sometimes it’s yor forger cosplaying sexy hornet

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 10

me: “should I just be a real pervert and give him paw pads?” shannon: “giving him paw pads would be the least perverse thing about this drawing”

Several doodles of my warrior of light, Quin’a, from ffxiv. He is a little kitty with green hair and a hot pink outfit. The top left has a shitty colored pencil scribble of him, where he’s wearing his pink glasses and his tail is a literal asparagus. It says “Nya!!” next to it in pink bubble letters and there are a bunch of geeen and pink hearts. In the doodle at the top right, quin’a is lying on his back like a kitty cat on the carpet with his little arms curled up all cute, looking upward and to the left. The final drawing is by far the most questionable and is a weird panty-shot low-angle, legs-spread, furry version of quin’a lying on his back and making cute kitty paws motions with his hands. He has pink paw pads on his peets. His tail is preserving his modesty by getting very close to the views in forced perspective. He’s making a little three mouth, because he is a kitty. You know, like Nya.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 10

uhhhhhhh

a photograph of an iPad screen with two weird little doodles of my warrior of light on it. One is colored and one is just a basic sketch. The one that is colored is passably similar looking to my wol (a pale miqote with light green hair and an asparagus tail, wearing all hot pink) curled up like a kitty on the floor. The second doodle, which is just a pink outline scribble right now, is much more incriminating on the furry front and very very kitty

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 8

what if we made an arsene plushie with humorously long legs. Like long enough to use as a scarf. Like this

A plush of a monkey with very long arms and legs that can be used to hang the plushie from something. It has Velcro on its hands for grabbing. Imagine this but only the legs are long and also the body is like a regular-ass wol plushie body

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 8

tall women keep QRTing this to flex

The iconic Ward Sutton comic panel of a weird little man with stubble, bushy eyebrows and eye bags wearing a shirt that says “SICKOS”. He is leering through a window saying “YES… HA HA HA… YES!” which is precisely how I feel when tall women start flocking to me in droves.

rat dad@splinterhamato· Jun 7

WE WENT AND SAW A PRODUCTION OF A NEW SCI-FI HORROR YURI PLAY!!!! IT WAS SO MUCH FUN AND I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT IT!!!! THE DIRECTOR EVEN CAME AND LISTENED TO ME RAMBLE FOR A BIT AFTERWARDS WAHHH AN AMAZING EVENING!!! I LOVE THEATER!!!!!

$Me and my boy Gabe (two approximately 30 year old white brunettes with glasses and button up shirts) posing in front of a poster for “The Luminous Dead” by Caitlin Starling, Adapted for the stage by Andrew Hungerford. The poster has lime green text over a dark blue illustration of a human skull inside what looks like a space suit with a cracked glass canopy. It appears to be underwater. Gabe is smiling because he is kind and approachable and I am STONE COLD and THROWING UP DUECES cuz I take this theater shit SERIOUS. I am absolutely fascinated by the bizarre way the poster is refracted in the corners of our glasses.$