Count Audrey ⚰️🦇

@turbocricket

“Yeah the scientist girl with the big swirly glasses is fixing my machine” 🖤Wandering Mad Scientist by trade, shapeshifter and tragedy enjoyer by hobby 🧪🪡🎭 he/him or she/her 🦇 pfp by Takato Yamamoto 🖤

146 Following356 Followers1,146 Posts

Bluesky

Is this your profile?Claim it and turbocricket.dirty.social is yours.Claim profile

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 18d

Bluesky really is the “mark 👏 the 👏 vans 👏” of microblogging sites

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 18d

?????????????????????? Don’t make me go back to Twitter man

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 24d

⛵️🌊 The Odyssey (2026) Went in to this a little cynical but yeah that ruled. The Circe scene was a 10/10 from start to finish. Spent a good chunk of the movie going “How is Nolan going to make this about the atomic bomb- Ohh Ohhhhhhhhh!”

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 24d

✍️🪓 Misery - Stephen King I feel very lucky to have gone into this blind besides knowing the basic premise. I genuinely didn’t know where this was going to go and it was TENSE. Spend enough time in fandom spaces and you encounter hundreds of would-be Annie Wilkes.

The #1 New York Times bestseller about a famous novelist held hostage in a remote location by his "number one fan." One of "Stephen King's best...genuinely scary" (USA TODAY).
Paul Sheldon is a bestselling novelist who has finally met his number one fan. Her name is Annie Wilkes, and she is more than a rabid reader--she is Paul's nurse, tending his shattered body after an automobile accident. But she is also furious that the author has killed off her favorite character in his latest book. Annie becomes his captor, keeping him prisoner in her isolated house.
Annie wants Paul to write a book that brings Misery back to life--just for her. She has a lot of ways to spur him on. One is a needle. Another is an axe. And if they don't work, she can get really nasty.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 25d

The IMDB page always gets me

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· 25d

Hey is that good

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jul 8

CHILD OF THE NIGHT

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jul 4

OUUUUUUUGH WIFE

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jul 3

I’m going to laugh so hard if the first song on this playlist is Smells like Teen Spirit or Creep

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jul 2

🌧️🏚️ Private Rites - Julia Armfield Went from A Midsummer Night’s Dream to “King Lear and his dyke daughters” (actual quote) and all the whiplash that entails. Julia Armfield tore my heart out last year with Our Wives Under The Sea and she’s outdone herself with a gayer, soggier, sadder novel.

It’s been raining for a long time now, for so long that the lands have reshaped themselves and the cities have retreated to higher storeys. As old places have disappeared, arcane rituals have crept back into practice. Sisters Isla, Irene and Agnes have not spoken in some time when their estranged father dies. A famous architect revered for making the new world navigable, they find themselves uncertain of how to grieve his passing when everything around them seems to be ending anyway.

As the sisters come together to clear the grand glass house that is the pinnacle of his legacy, they begin to sense that the magnetic influence of their father lives on through it. Soon it becomes clear that others have taken an interest in both his estate and them, and that perhaps their inheritance may not be theirs alone.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 28

💰🔫 Bound (1996) Wanted to make sure I watched this for pride and yeah it ruled Said “I think I hauve covid” no less than four times watching this. Caesar’s delivery of “wake up you fucking. Dyke” has both entered my wife and I’s vernacular and will be my new alarm tone. Violet and Corky ouuuuugh

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 28

🧟‍♀️🍬 Zombie Stage: Round 1 Alien Stage!! But they’re zombies now!! I’ll admit I wasn’t the biggest fan of alnst but I always appreciate how toxic Mizi and Sua are. Will probably check out when the blonde demon shows up but I feel like this still felt fun and fresh despite recycling the same beats

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 27

🪑🚪 Backrooms (2026) Saw this with my coworker who’s a huge fan of the YouTube series so it was fun to see his reaction (along with the entire teenage population of the podunk town I’m staying in) I enjoy that Clark is getting the moe uwu treatment online that a lot of horror protagonists receive

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 27

🧚‍♂️✨ Puck - Samantha Allen Wanted something lighter to round out my pride month reads and I’m always a sucker for modern Shakespeare retellings. This delivered on both, though I found myself much more invested in Puck’s friendship with Mia than the actual romance we got. Happy for some OCD rep though

In this A Midsummer Night’s Dream-inspired romcom, Puck is a reality show producer and agent of chaos with a talent for bringing people together . . . and tearing them apart.

Meet Puck: the nonbinary, thirty-year-old mastermind behind Homewreckers, a dating show that puts troubled couples through hell—with a little help from their exes. Used to being the one pulling the strings, it shocks Puck when their life undergoes a plot twist of its own and their college roommate Mia announces her engagement to her ex’s best friend, Damon. Having only recently broken up with longtime-boyfriend Zander, and never having had much in common with Damon (who lovesick Lena has always pined after), Mia’s news leaves her friend group reeling—and Puck’s mind whirling.

When they arrive for a week of wedding festivities at an upscale resort in the Appalachian forest, Puck immediately sees that Mia’s marriage will lead to misery, and takes it upon themself to save their friends by rearranging the couples—without anyone finding out. But as Puck comes up against a type-A maid of honor hell-bent on making this wedding happen, it becomes clear that they will have to deliver the greatest stunt of their career. If only they can take their eyes off the bridesmaid. After all, the course of true love never did run smooth…

Written with Samantha Allen’s signature charm, wit, and an irresistible dose of Shakespearian mischief, Puck is the ultimate romcom for our chaotic era, and a celebration of the friendships that carry us through it all.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 22

@ The one percent of StoryGraph readers that tagged this as “hopeful”

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 22

🍸🚪 Giovanni’s Room - James Baldwin JFC. Americans should never go to Europe indeed. That monologue in the fourth chapter was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read. 10/10 David is such a bum

Baldwin's haunting and controversial second novel is his most sustained treatment of sexuality, and a classic of gay literature. In a 1950s Paris swarming with expatriates and characterized by dangerous liaisons and hidden violence, an American finds himself unable to repress his impulses, despite his determination to live the conventional life he envisions for himself. After meeting and proposing to a young woman, he falls into a lengthy affair with an Italian bartender and is confounded and tortured by his sexual identity as he oscillates between the two.

Examining the mystery of love and passion in an intensely imagined narrative, Baldwin creates a moving and complex story of death and desire that is revelatory in its insight.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 20

🕯️✝️ Leviticus (2026): Using both posters because I like how they match. Not as scary as I was expecting but an interesting premise and a good use of stretching a small budget. Watched it with a friend that said the desire demon would make a great springboard for fanfics and I agree

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 19

- Also really liked the villain. Don’t want to say too much about them for fear of spoilers but every time they were justifying their motivation a certain Eric Andre quote about a certain British Prime Minister floated through my head. - Anyway, highly recommend. This was my biggest takeaway:

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 19

❤️💙 This is How You Lose The Time War - Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone Wasn’t my intention to read two time traveling romances in a row but here we are! Had to read it twice to figure out what was going on but the prose is easily digestible. My favorite parts were early banter b/w Red and Blue.

From award-winning authors Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone comes an enthralling, romantic novel spanning time and space about two time-traveling rivals who fall in love and must change the past to ensure their future.
Among the ashes of a dying world, an agent of the Commandment finds a letter. It reads: Burn before reading.
Thus begins an unlikely correspondence between two rival agents hellbent on securing the best possible future for their warring factions. Now, what began as a taunt, a battlefield boast, becomes something more. Something epic. Something romantic. Something that could change the past and the future.
Except the discovery of their bond would mean the death of each of them. There’s still a war going on, after all. And someone has to win. That’s how war works, right?
Cowritten by two beloved and award-winning sci-fi writers, This Is How You Lose the Time War is an epic love story spanning time and space

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 18

Kind of obsessed with this map. A Louizona fusion state would produce some of the best cuisine this nation could ever offer. Its northern neighbor Utanois would produce 3000 calorie monstrosities

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 18

There’s a froyo place in the Idaho panhandle (bc of course it’s in Idaho) that sells cups with his face on them Spoiled because it looks like actual dogshit

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 16

⚔️📝 The Everlasting - Alix E. Harrow What I expected: Time travel fantasy with a cool lady knight!! What I got: Fascist regimes will weaponize a romanticized and fabricated past in order to control the future. Also cool time loops and hot lady knights.

Sir Una Everlasting was Dominion’s greatest hero: the orphaned girl who became a knight, who died for queen and country. Her legend lives on in songs and stories, in children’s books and recruiting posters—but her life as it truly happened has been forgotten.

Centuries later, Owen Mallory—failed soldier, struggling scholar—falls in love with the tale of Una Everlasting. Her story takes him to war, to the archives—and then into the past itself. Una and Owen are tangled together in time, bound to retell the same story over and over again, no matter what it costs.

But that story always ends the same way. If they want to rewrite Una’s legend—if they want to tell a different story--they’ll have to rewrite history itself.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· Jun 5

☀️💌 Sunburn - Chloe Michelle Howarth 10/10 THAT SHIT HURTED 💔

It's the early 1990s, and in the Irish village of Crossmore, Lucy feels out of place. Despite her fierce friendships, she's always felt this way, and the conventional path of marriage and motherhood doesn't appeal to her at all. Not even with handsome and doting Martin, her closest childhood friend.

Lucy begins to make sense of herself during a long hot summer, when a spark with her school friend Susannah escalates to an all-consuming infatuation, and, very quickly, to a desperate and devastating love.

Fearful of rejection from her small and conservative community, Lucy begins living a double life, hiding the most honest parts of herself in stolen moments with Susannah.

But with the end of school and the opportunity to leave Crossmore looming, Lucy must choose between two places, two people and two futures, each as terrifying as the other. But only one can offer her real happiness.

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· May 29

+ Cool rocks and a scary bridge

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· May 29

Woosh

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· May 29

Found a beach! 🏞️

Count Audrey ⚰️🦇@turbocricket· May 28

⚙️🤖 Gearbreakers - Zoe Hana Mikuta Unfortunately a case of a concept outweighing its execution, which sucks because the concept is SO GOOD!! I just didn’t fw the writing style at all. I loved Sona and Eris but could not bring myself to care about literally any other character in this 😭