Birds Are Dinosaurs

@birdsaredinosaurs

"Thou shalt not make a machine in the likeness of a human mind." 🦢=🦖 She/her

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Bluesky

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Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 18d

This Turkish bakery has strange clientele.

A sign clearly hastily printed off a home computer says in English and Turkish: "Kindly avoid using the bidet for washing feet. Thank you."

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 18d

Me too, Walking Dead arcade game

The exterior of a Walking Dead arcade cabinet that says "Don't open, dead inside"

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 20d

One time, Dearest Husband sent me this meme at the exact second I sent it to him. I thought the app was glitching out, but no, we're just extremely married.

Dearest Husband and I sending each other the same Dune meme at the exact same time and then laughing about it

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 20d

Go into your photo roll or whatever, and post the first image that makes you laugh literally out loud.

The Dude from The Big Lebowski: "Come off it, Paul. You're not even fuckin' Fremen. You're fuckin' Orange Catholic.

Walter, but he's got blue eyes and is wearing a stilsuit: What the fuck are you talking about? I converted when I mounted and rode a Maker.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 24d

IMHO none of the Tremors sequels are canon except for the part where Burt gets divorced

Burt and Heather Gummer from the 1990 film Tremors. They're libertarian survivalists so both of them are holding big guns. Burt looks exactly like you think he would and Heather looks like country music star Reba McEntire (because she's played by Reba McEntire). Anyway, this relationship was always doomed whether or not their remote town was attacked by Graboids

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 25d

When someone follows me back

King Shark from the good Suicide Squad movie. He looks about as delighted as an anthropomorphic shark could be.

Caption: New dumb friends!

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 25d

We lost something as a society when movies stopped delivering exposition like this.

A still from the movie THEM! (which is a banger; so watch it.)

Close up of a typewriter memo. On top is stamped "STRANGE PHENOMENA FLYING SAUCERS". Beneath is typed: "Brownsville, Texas. Alan Crotty, Lazy K Ranch foreman insists reason for crashing his plane was due to seeing flying saucers shaped like ants..."

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 25d

The Odyssey (2026, dir. Chris Nolan)

A scene from Clue, third alternate ending. A young Michael McKean is standing by a door, looking pleased with himself. Caption: "I'm going to go home and sleep with my wife."

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 26d

Holy shit, guys. Check this out

A screenshot from your AI slop bores me, a site where you can pretend to be an llm and bullshit some prompts. I asked for it to draw me a "front facing horse" and somebody drew a beautiful horse. On their phone! With their human finger!

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· 27d

Apollo tossing the dodgeball of prophecy at random internet people just trying to be funny except I hastily scratched out "people" and wrote "cats"

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 12

Cocktail experimentation Season of the Witch .75oz applejack .75oz mezcal .75oz lemon .5oz strega .5oz allspice dram .25oz simple 1 dash cardamom bitters 1 egg white (Recipe from @bartenderhemry.bsky.social )

A cocktail surrounded by candles and monstera vines. The cocktail has a foamy head with a pentacle drawn in it with bitters.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 8

Tonight's cocktail perversion: The Hard Sell 1 oz gin 1 oz St-Germain .75 oz Malört .75 oz lemon juice

A cocktail in a vintage glass next to a bottle of Malört, Chicago's most treasured local poison

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 7

I spoke to my old friend Mitch McConnell this evening, the senior Senator from Kentucky. We talked for just shy of 20 minutes about IRAN, UKRAINE, the unfolding situation in MAINE, and our visit to the TR Presidential Library.

Morla the Ancient One from The Neverending Story, a giant turtle that lives in the Swamps of Sadness and is also the Senate Majority Leader

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 7

The closet:

The TARDIS. It looks like a blue police phone box on the outside. The inside is arbitrarily large.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 4

Happy 4th 🇺🇸

Follow the loglo outward, to where the growth is enfolded into the valleys and the canyons, and you find the land of the refugees. They have fled from the true America, the America of atomic bombs, scalpings, hip-hop, chaos theory, cement overshoes, snake handlers, spree killers, space walks, buffalo jumps, drive-bys, cruise missiles; Sherman's March, gridlock, motorcycle gangs, and bungee jumping. They have parallel-parked their bimbo boxes in identical computer-designed Burbclave street patterns and secreted themselves in symmetrical sheetrock shitholes with vinyl floors and ill-fitting woodwork and no sidewalks, vast house farms out in the loglo wilderness, a culture medium for a medium culture.

Neal Stephenson, Snow Crash

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 4

Proof

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 3

Brunt (FCA) from Star Trek Deep Space Nine is on MSNBC's Hardball, presumably complaining about taxes and feeeeemales

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 3

Charlie's creepy relative from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia wearing enormous fake hands duct taped to his wrists

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 2

Hardball on MSNBC with special guest The InfoWars Elf. The Onion tried to cancel him but now he's here to tell his story!

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jul 2

🤔

Chat log

DH: [Minion Voice] Uranium

Me: I mean, I would certainly hate watch a version of Oppenheimer with Minions in it
Me: Because the feds would have to interview the Minions during the investigation into Oppenheimer's communist ties, and the Minions would absolutely be responsible for Oppenheimer losing his clearance
Me: THAT'S WHY THEY'RE OBSESSED WITH BANANAS. They're a unit of radiation measurment.

DH: See THAT'S a premise

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 30

This movie rules. Godzilla fights a half-human, half-Godzilla, half-rose bush that's haunted by the ghost of a dead girl. Also the Saudis are trying to steal an unrelated bioweapon designed to kill Godzilla. Does Saudi Arabia have a Godzilla problem? OF COURSE NOT 10/10 peak cinema

Poster for Godzilla vs Biollante. It looks dope as fuck. Truth in advertising.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 29

Shout outs to this lady. Superb Final Girl instincts.

Patricia from Widow's Bay. She's holding a shotgun pointed at someone or something off screen. Not today, motherfucker

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 28

You can bully people who use genAI. It's always morally correct.

(This is the prince meme template, except it's Garrak from Star Trek Deep Space Nine, and he's looking especially sarcastic and condescending. Data from TNG is chilling in the background, perhaps as punishment for all those Sherlock Holmes holodeck shenanigans)

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 26

I had an intrusive thought today. BEHOLD: Three Mile Island Iced Tea .5 oz each of: • Mezcal • Green Chartreuse • Wray & Nephew Overproof Rum • Cointreau • Gin • Lemon • Simple syrup Shake and then top with Jarritos lime

A tulip glass full of a cocktail the color of uranium.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 21

Yummy 🤤

A truly vile looking cocktail. It looks like poison.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 21

Reflecting Pool cocktail Recipe by @bartenderhemry.bsky.social The original called for muddled mint, but I substituted fresh blueberries so that as you drink it mysterious blue substances occasionally rise up from the murky depths

A cocktail the color of a bathtub after Shrek used it. It looks like four ounces of pond scum in a fancy antique coupe glass.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 20

This lady's entire plot arc is "I would like to have sex with my clone" and tragically she fails

The evil mirror universe version of Kira from DS9. Her outfit looks like fetish gear designed by 1940's Hugo Boss. She's having a great time and exuding an aura of bisexual horniness. Happy Pride.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 20

Intendant Kira's Mirror Universe Bajorian Ale 2 oz black strap rum .5 oz Allspice dram .5 oz chocolate brandy 1 oz lime 3 oz blood orange ginger beer

A Mirror Universe Bajorian Ale. It's a darker, more brutal version of the original

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 19

Bajorian Ale 2 oz white rum 1 oz lime .5 oz Cointreau .5 oz Velvet Falernum scant .25 oz Green Chili Vodka 1 dash cardamom bitters Shake with ice and top with 3 oz of elderflower tonic

A half pint of Bajorian Ale in a frosted mug from Quark's Bar. The puppet in the background is unrelated. DO NOT PLAY WITH IT. IT IS NOT A TOY.

Birds Are Dinosaurs@birdsaredinosaurs· Jun 19

Time to figure out what Bajoran Ale tastes like.