Liz

@certainlynotliz

Just dancing through the lightning strikes. ALLCAPS. Opinions here are my own; nothing is an endorsement. 🫶 📚✈️ 📸 🏒

2060 Siguiendo1697 Seguidores706 Publicaciones

Bluesky

¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y certainlynotliz.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Liz@certainlynotliz· 16d

If you’re looking for a single quick view of your teams current status in real-time, the Microsoft 365 “people” companion app is built for this

Liz@certainlynotliz· 17d

And because I’ve committed to the bit

1989 (Taylor’s Version) cover made to look like the cover for Carl vin Clausewitz’s On War (Carl’s Version)

Liz@certainlynotliz· 17d

His name is Carl and he was born in 1780

Liz@certainlynotliz· Jul 13

The way I will take any quiz that assigns me Pantone colors…

My Pantone birth chart palatte with Aries Sun, Aries Moon, Virgo Rising, and Aquarius Venus

Liz@certainlynotliz· Jul 1

Cartoon depiction of a pitcher of juice, the Kool-Aid man, with arms and legs, and a face painted on the pitcher, holding up a smaller pitcher with the words Oh Yeah! Under the pitcher's feet.

Liz@certainlynotliz· Jul 1

That’s it, I’m gonna fist fight the sun

A screenshot of the AccuWeather app showing the heat index in Alexandria, Va is currently 112 degrees

Liz@certainlynotliz· Apr 2

Chrome. It's 9am. What the fuck?

Liz@certainlynotliz· Mar 23

Absolutely beautiful flowers, but I’ll never know who they’re from because the card was written in gibberish 😂

A vase of colorful flowers sitting on a shelf in front of a gallery wall

Liz@certainlynotliz· Feb 25

Two years later

Liz@certainlynotliz· Feb 25

Liz@certainlynotliz· Feb 24

Just because I need to see it again

Hockey player Tom Wilson delivers a hit to Brody Tkchuk

Liz@certainlynotliz· Feb 18

My dog, Wilson, has dementia and that means sometimes he gets really really anxious and it’s hard to redirect him and calm him down. What works? I’m so glad you asked, it’s, for reasons unknown, the Twilight movies. He’s totally locked in and it’s completely calmed him down 😂

A small brown and black dog, Wilson, laying on a sofa attentively watching the Twilight movie

Liz@certainlynotliz· Feb 10

Suited up for what feels like the first time in forever. The goal (as always) is to dress like that bear on the Polo sweaters

Picture of a feminine presenting human in front of a full length mirror in a blazer, button down, and adult pants.

Liz@certainlynotliz· Jan 12

The absurdity of having to pay to receive packages at your own home

A screenshot from my buildings package locker registration screen showing the $20 registration fee and a late fee of $3 per day for not picking up a package fast enough.

Liz@certainlynotliz· Dec 10

but I need all those tabs

screen shot of the google chrome tab bar with what looks like at least 45 tabs open

Liz@certainlynotliz· Nov 21

Came here to get a dopamine hit from swifties psyched for cardigans but instead I found this. Happy break ruined.

Screenshot of trending topics that include: NATO, CDC, National Guard, Karoline Leavitt, Coast Guard, and The Archers

Liz@certainlynotliz· Nov 18

Thank you all for coming, there’s a lot on the agenda so we’ll skip the introductions

Liz@certainlynotliz· Nov 17

Linkedin is particularly odd today

Liz@certainlynotliz· Nov 10

My advice is always ruin the workplace

New York Time Headline “Did Women Ruin the Workplace?”

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 27

my robot interns are on the struggle bus today

Screenshot of AI response to "Hey! You're not supposed to be using betting market data!" reading "You're absolutely right - I apologize for the error, the instructions explicitly state "no speculation or unreliable sources allowed. Never include information from betting sites, casinos, odds makers, or any other entertainment based source"

Screenshot of AI response reading "Thank you for clarifying - I can now confirm there IS an active government shutdown"

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 24

I bet you $20 that a millennial wrote this headline 😆

Screenshot of a headline reading "Bosses are firing Gen X Left and Right (And Honestly, We See Why)

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 16

Teams' got jokes this morning

A screen shot of a teams message reading 25% of men in New Zealand* are named Hamish
*not a real statistic but very probable

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 12

Saw my best friend since the second day of 7th grade today, in person, for the first time in 10 years. I already miss her

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 11

Remember that time I commanded my high school’s army? Took a tour today and the legacy endures (we won the award and also hand made that guideon in 1997) 🤣😂🤣 bonus picture of 15 year old me taking this way too seriously

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 9

cool cool cool cool cool cool cool

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 8

Seriously friends, this made my afternoon

screen shot of text from meeting recap reading: [Blank] explained that the meeting was initiated through your introduction, highlighting your role in connecting the parties. She emphasized your close working relationship and described you as a wonderful partner and advocate, which set a positive tone for the conversation.

Liz@certainlynotliz· Oct 1

I always thought the stereotype that the elderly eat dinner early was kinda fake, but then this elderly Trash Gremlin started harassing me for his dinner at 4:30pm, on the dot, every single day.

Photo of an elderly scruffy small black and tan dog begging for food

Liz@certainlynotliz· Sep 30

cool cool cool cool cool...totally normal stuff 😧

Liz@certainlynotliz· Sep 26

Well at least they added to cart this time?

Liz@certainlynotliz· Sep 19

I am cackling