Chrstphr S. Grdn

@chrstphrsg

partner • 3L @ BLS • photographer • writer • night owl • he/him summa: con law, the judiciary, due process, equal protection • analytic juris, fregean & performative semantics • cognition, episteme, ontology; parmenides, plato, aristotle

2228 Siguiendo834 Seguidores1584 Publicaciones

Bluesky

¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y chrstphrsg.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· 7d

Robert Caro sits at his large wooden desk in front of a typewriter and lamp writing with pen and legal pad, behind him is a massive pushpin board with pages neatly organized in a top row and sections below.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· 8d

Hank Scorpio, a red-headed bearded man in a green sweater, launches a flame thrower while laughing maniacally.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· 11d

Sideshow Bob stepping on a rake meme: The rake hitting him in the face is labelled "territorial statehood."

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· 14d

John Oliver's angry lookback after getting slapped in his guest appearance on General Hospital.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· 19d

"Remember Pete?"

Milhouse showing a despondent Bart some lame pogs he exchanged for Bart's soul.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jul 5

"Oh no. Just how upset were you to return home and discover FIFA was three corruptions in a trench coat?"

Bill Hader impersonates Keith Morrison for SNL hosting Dateline, interviewing a guest for a horrific story, he's smiling excited and eating a tub of popcorn.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jul 2

some auto shops have complimentary cats

A grey tabby cat looking up from the floor with big green-blue eyes and standing next to a pair of legs.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 29

"The First Congress may legislate substantive constructions for the constitutional framework, but for reason of political inertia no future Congress may & the Court may declare this political question settled."

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 29

"Legislative enactments contrary to *prior* legislative enactments? What unheard of sovereign power is this people's Legislature supposed to be!"

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 24

Meghan and her beautiful Jewish friends in America reacting to some remark Trump just made about his "Jewish Accountant":

Nathan Hanging Out with Friends meme shows a picture of a laughing Nathan Fielder standing alone in front of a boring beige wall.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 22

Cartoon drawing of three kids in tattered clothes who sit around a small campfire listening to a man in a torn business suit inform. The caption dialogue reads, "Yes, the planet got destroyed, but for a beautiful moment in time we focused our talents on the emotional needs of the truly rich"

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 19

👀

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 6

I get the Greatest Generation impulse yall, I really do, but I think you might undercut your point with takes like this by overlooking experiences of vets in the all-Black units. Takes like this kinda buy into the white lie that birthed the likes of Hegseths.

QT of post, which originally quotes Hegseth at Normandy spouting Nazi ideology, stating, "In WW2 there was one combatant pushing ethno-nationalism to the nth degree, and it wasn't the US."

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Jun 5

Google's targeted ads on YouTube have officially clocked me as a 3L I guess . . .

Screencap of a sponsored YouTube ad for an alcoholism study that shows a white woman sitting on a boring grey couch with a glass wine looking sick & distraught with what looks like food poisoning. The text says, "Drinking to relax? See if you qualify for an alcohol study—adults ages 21 to 49 who want to drink less. Completely confidential."

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· May 28

Most importantly, & maybe from the tiny Marx in my brain, but 'legal fiction' need not be pejorative—it's a recognition of the artificial, the legal gloss humans put on the material world & social relations. Neither good nor bad, fictions function to structure our social world.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· May 28

Did his legal writing prof. lie to him or did mine to me? Did he misunderstand or is he lying to himself? I was not taught that the Statement of Facts in a brief is a "plain recitation of the facts." This is more of a memo; a brief is telling your clients' story—not lies, but *not* neutral.

Screencap of text:

'I remember this acutely from my time working in Big Law. One of the first things you learn as a newly minted litigator is the basic structure of a legal brief. A brief is typically separated into two primary sections. First, the statement of facts, a plain recitation of the facts underlying the case; second, the argument, all your
editorializing on top of that. In other words, you tell people what happened, and then you tell them your interpretation of it.'

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· May 28

Is going to a T25 school like going to Hogwarts? What is this fantasy world spoken of here?

Screencap of text

'upon arriving at law school, immediately found myself immersed in a world that was both all-encompassing and totally bewildering in its blind faith and love for the law. The students beamed with excitement; the administrators constantly told us how important we were; the professors seemed to believe wholeheartedly in the efficacy of the judicial process.'

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· May 28

🙃 we are different people

Screencap of article that reads:

'My view of this is colored by my own experience. I came to being a lawyer relatively late—at the ripe old age of 30—and upon arriving at law school, immediately found myself immersed in a world that was both all-encompassing and totally bewildering in its blind faith and love for the law. The students beamed with excitement; the administrators constantly told us how important we were...'

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· May 1

We Should Improve Society Somewhat Meme:

—We need better infrastructure, says the feudal era laborer hauling a bundle of sticks over his back.

—If we "needed" better infrastructure wouldn't the market just provide it? says the modern douche popping out from a stone well.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 27

OP: It is odd to me that society has converged on this One Signifier. QP: OP seems confused how signifiers work. I explain how the One Signifier can stand in opposition to the things signified & how we don't value the One Signifier per se, but rather a variety of personal experiences It signifies.

Screen-cap of a quote post exchange:

Original post reads, "I still remain astonished that Blockbuster, known for price gouging, ridiculous late fees, ambitions of a monopoly and censorship of films, has become a nostalgia beacon. For the kids, it would be like everyone suddenly sighing about the warm summer days at Walmart."

Quote poster reads, "Yeah, I mean Blockbuster itself was a lousy business that was quickly replaced the moment an alternative came along. But people don't give a shit about the chain itself, but the high-friction commitment to choosing a movie and watching it, which made them care about movies more than now."

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 14

Are We The Baddies? meme showing someone wearing an SS uniform, captioned: Are we the idolaters?

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 2

Goose Chase Meme:

First panel: skeptical goose says, "What side of the assembly were the southern slavers sitting on when Lincoln was elected?"

Second panel: Screaming goose chasing a man wearing a puffer down a hill says, "WHAT SIDE!"

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 1

The 12th ed. (1884, post 14th Amend. rat.) is where a dominant common understanding (consensus?) shows evid. of breaking down; a further footnote (1) to footnote (a) that now accounts for political reaction to 14th Amend. ratification:

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 1

11th:

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 1

10th:

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 1

9th:

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Apr 1

Torturing myself skimming some amici for Trump v. Barbara, & one I couldn’t help review was from Claremont Inst. (I know...). This quote & ref. to James Madison’s 1835 Essay on Sovereignty, under a section titled “The American Revolution Rejected the Feudal Doctrine of Birthright Subjectship... 1/

Screencap of section from Amicus Brief filed by Clarement Inst. for petitioners in Trump v. Barbara; it reads:

"Thus, the Revolution transformed the legal conception of political membership from one based on birthright subjectship to one based on mutual consent. See Erler, supra, at 182; see also James Madison, Essay "On Sovereignty" (ca. 1835), (discussing the need to "consult the Theory which contemplates a certain number of individuals as meeting and agreeing to form one political society, in order that the rights and the safety & the interest of each may be under the safeguard of the whole"), quoted in Erler, supra, at 181.

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Mar 29

Anakin & Padme 4-Panel "For the Better, Right?" Meme, captioned as,

Anakin: What works in the middle of the country will work on the coasts, but not in reverse.

Padme: But the coasts should at least still do those things that work on the coast right?

Anakin: [silence]

Padme: The coasts should still do those things that work on the coast right?

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Mar 28

how has law review been going you ask?

Old Man Yells at Cloud Simpsons Meme, depicting a newspaper cutout held in hand showing Abe Simpson angrily lifting his fist to a lone white cloud, but modified to be title "Old Man Yells at Article for Its Single Footnote in an Entire Paragraph"

Chrstphr S. Grdn@chrstphrsg· Feb 1

quite happy to mention I will be on the Exec. Articles Editors team for Vol. 92 & frankly thrilled to work with this whole group