I won't say anything when that tax return hits but there will be signs

I've put a lot of time and energy into training Olive to feel safe and calm and happy so it's nice to see that paying off in big ways

last year we had to move the couch (and tv) into the spare room because the dogs kept getting into vicious fights over it, so to see them calmly sharing a space like this is just wonderful

took a shit in the shower now I'm walking to the club

drinkiong 100 watered down vodka lime and sofas and sending this to everyonene

drinking 100 martinis abd sending this to everyong

drinking 100 margs and sending this to everyone

come on now

the bots are doing JOI in insta comments now

"but the algorithm is less toxiccccc" sure but this bio does not match this band

"but the soooounnnddd qualityyyyy" ok but these are not the same artist but they're on the same profile

dig through the ditches and burn through the witches I slam in the back of my Dragulaaaa

my (husband's) cat is on steroids and they've turned him into a ravenous little cunt

arguing about the accuracy of calling aela a girl who poops and accidentally re-inventing the madonna/whore complex

youse remember this racist fuck?

I moved into a new house last week and now I live within a short walking distance to some really lovely places

okkkkk this drill bit set is flirting with me

god give me the strength to resist eating the entire tray

me right before I come:

rate my setup

these mushrooms are kicking my ass man I don't need this

ah yes the 3 genders

him: I'll send you my focaccia recipe Me:

yoooo they're selling pocket pussy's at melbourne airport

RT to burn your hole

if the witch who cursed me for the month of august is reading this please contact me. I just want to talk

show me on the screenshot where I'm accusing you of being anything, extra marks if you can identify what I'm projecting

just posting some halloween costume inspo (HMU if you can sew and give me pointers)