Evan Fowler
@evanfowler
Stand-Up Comedian, Filmmaker, Writer, Pancreatic Novelty
One plain hotdog? Just under $6. Patronizing promise that this price is “great”? Priceless.
See, this is what I’m talking about. Life gets more confusing and self-referential by the day. How is this a headline? Am I supposed to know about the space hot dog? Or is it meant to intrigue me into clicking for more information? There is zero chance that clarification makes this more interesting.
For your convenience, all Disney+ ‘No Ads’ plans will now proudly feature ads. You cannot block them. You cannot skip them. You will not escape them. You WILL watch trailers for “Snow White and the Seven Dwarves”. Even if they have to send thugs in Mickey suits to tie you to the goddamn chair.
This is kind of interesting. The Editor’s note to the writer was accidentally left in the text of the piece. I don’t know what I find more amusing, the misspelling or the confident declaration that the top image must not depict the plague-carrying rodent, because it gives the story away.
Is it bad that I spent more than 50% of this expecting that the other 50% was going to contain an announcement of an appointment to the Trump administration?
Every time I watch JD Vance, I try to place what his empty, soulless eyes remind me of. Tonight, I remembered.
The most underrated part of “The Shining” is getting to see what Stanley Kubrick thought a black man’s apartment looks like.
“Hey, Carmine. What sets off the metal detectors first, the lead in your ass or the shit in your brains?” -John McClane My favorite part of Die Hard 2 is where Bruce Willis says this to Dennis Franz which stuns Franz into a mute silence where he makes this face. He looks cut down to his very soul.
Little known movie trivia: The huffing scene in Blue Velvet wasn’t meant for the film. That was just part of Hopper’s process.
Haha. The “Washington Examiner” had a huge night for passive aggression. Haha.
He’s… on a bicycle? Is he going to roll up the burger and throw it at my door? This isn’t really a bike friendly part of Georgia. I live between steep hills and other steep hills that are also creepy confederate graveyards. This dude must have the ankle-power of Kid Icarus.