GaelicGarlic
@gaelicgarlic
Irish/Italian/Chicagoan; Border Collie Whisperer; Live Music Junkie; Attorney and Technology Exec; eDiscovery, Computer Forensics, Cybersecurity and Privacy Nerd; Bears/Blackhawks/Bulls/White Sox; Stubbornly Independent; Sometimes Feisty
Posting this 23 year-old headline from the Onion today for no particular reason.
As a self-described citizen journalist, I went undercover to investigate why Congress hasn’t been getting much done lately. What I found was shocking. After arriving on scene, I observed locked doors, empty hallways, and zero staff. No lawmakers. No activity. Legacy media won’t show you this.
If the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator ever classified “used hot dog water” as a personality type, he wouldn’t just be the poster child—he’d be the diagnostic criteria.
So, pretty much every country was added to the tariff list except Russia, North Korea, and Belarus. They even tariffed penguins. But please, tell me again how Trump’s ties to Russia are a hoax. Explain it to me like I’m 5. All of the obvious evidence smacking me in the face must be distracting me.
For the uninitiated, St. Paddy’s weekend in Chicago is like Christmas, New Year’s Eve, Halloween and a particularly racaous bachelorette party, all rolled up into one. It is the unofficial start of Chicago summer.
“You don't see too many atheists on the deathbed. They all start cramming then.” - Dolly Parton
Got to spend Valentine’s Day with this beauty. I’m fully aware that I’ve outkicked my coverage in every conceivable way. So long as no one tells her that, I think we’re good. It’ll be our little secret.
Next time someone beats their chest and snarls at you that the US was founded on Christian values, tell them our Founding Fathers beg to differ. I was raised Catholic. More spiritual than religious now, but think faith is fine. It’s the perversion by grifters that is the problem.
I call this piece “I’m Done Sleeping, and Now You Should Be, Too.” It’s part of my “What’s Personal Space? / Take Me for Another Walk, Dammit / Dogs Own Humans, Not the Other Way Around / Sure, I’m a Hairy Little Freeloader, But I Still Make the All the Rules” collection.
Here is the gorgeous Hawaiian sunset I watched during my dinner tight. May it lower your blood pressure as much as it did mine. Early flight back home tomorrow. Pray for me.
Ugh. I miss (and don’t miss) when Bandit was this small. Now he is 60 lbs of boundless, ever shedding energy
Seems on brand. I tuned him out a while ago. He’s always given me vibes of a 45- year old dude who lives in his mom’s basement. Not a fan of BlueAnon accounts like his.