Hamm!

@hammonddiehl

Fantasy writer hiding behind a pen name. Diabolical Plots. Strange Horizons. Kaleidotrope. Lightspeed. FlameTree Press. Codex. The crawl space under your spare bedroom.

388 Siguiendo331 Seguidores1152 Publicaciones

Bluesky

¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y hammonddiehl.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· 20d

My son, I was born in 1972

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· 23d

All I’m saying is, if you don’t sleep in, you may miss this, is all I’m saying

Close up of the toe pads of a calico cat

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jul 19

Don’t know what you are, strange Farmers Market vegetable, but I sure do love you

A fruit or vegetable that looks like a pear and a cherimoya had a pretty speckled baby

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jul 3

This person has made literally billions by airing her personal life to millions. My wish for everybody this July 4 is say whatever you want. The wealthy will be fine

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jun 25

Obsessed with this tiny Burmese glass pig whimsy.

A small glass figurine of a pig done in the Burmese technique. On display at the Chrysler Museum in Virginia

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jun 22

My dad can beat up your dad and also my dad can make a self portrait out of pie dough

A self portrait of a man etched in pie dough and baked golden

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jun 13

"Phase"

Post from the Nation magazine: "Donald Trump is relentlessly trying to settle scores with his enemies. He's in what might be called the "Roy Cohn phase" of his presidency.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Mar 26

Look what my friend got me! I gotta Easter egg! I gotta Easter egg!

A bright pink, yellow and orange Pysanka style egg

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Mar 23

Seeing my 85-y/o dad before he dies isn’t selfish. Hoarding billions and starting wars of choice is. We shut down the damn government and nothing changed. Miss me with this blame the victim shit.

Poster: “If people would just stop spending money and put others first for once we could end all this shit in a month’s time. Tank everything and they’ll be forced to change. ICE at airports? Stop buying plane tickets. A general strike on everything would fix this but people are selfish.”

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Mar 12

So I am sampling the cocktails at the Academy Museum restaurant. Every year they make cocktails inspired by the films nominated for Best Picture. Behold, the Hamnet! Does anyone know what this orange flower thing on the top is supposed to be? I have not seen the film.

This year’s best picture inspired cocktail menu at Fanny’s at the Academy Museum, including the sold-out Bugonia

A forest green cocktail served with a chickpea based foam and an orange motif on the top. Flavors include elder flower and snap pea

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Feb 27

Why is this in my break room fridge

One half of a very dry, brown avocado, unwrapped, forlorn, half-gutted.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Feb 15

There’s a bird building a nest in our side yard. We noticed him tugging at our old ugly weed blocker, so we cut it into pieces for him and… behold!

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jan 15

This’ll end just fine

News headline: “Archaeologists Unearth Intricately Decorated Box Carved From Deer Bone That May Have Once Held Ancient Ointments”

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Dec 29

Nobody: Burpee: TOMATO THE SIZE OF CHARLIE BROWN’S HEAD

Photograph from the back of the latest Burpee catalog, featuring the “super Thom” tomato, larger than an entire adult hand.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Dec 29

Dad just got to the burger scene in Mr. Mercedes @stephenking.bsky.social

My father reacts to a key audiobook scene in King’s Mr. Mercedes

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Nov 23

Look around Leaves are brown There's a Brus-sels sprout on the ground

Hang on to your hopes my friend; this is indeed a pic of a single Brussels sprout on the hard winter ground

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Nov 19

I come here for family content

From Smithsonian Magazine: “and a first, astronomers saw a distant star shoot some of its plasma into space.“

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Oct 6

So I dropped the egg carton on the floor and I had to do something

Emergency egg bites borne of a carton of eggs dropped upon the floor

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Aug 31

[In the voice of Barry Gibb] How long is your caaaattt How long is your cat Cause I really need to knowwwww Cause we're livin in a world of cats

A calico cat lies on the lap of her owner. So long is this cat that she barely fits in the frame.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jul 19

Reporters maybe?

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jul 4

Let us pray

Less than a day’s worth of verification codes for various and sundry apps requiring 2FA. The list is long.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jun 16

I’m w my mom in the middle of nowhere but the spouse turned out hard in LA w this

An anti-Trump sign reading: No Kings/Royal Flush, with Trump’s combover being flushed down a golden toilet

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Jun 16

The solution was Hamm in the Living Room with a Letter Opener. Embedded deeply into her own eyeball. Because seriously people how does anybody win this

A seriously mangled worksheet for a family game of clue

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 26

Mine eyes have seen the fruits of the Farmers Market and mine wallet has felt the pain and I do not care

An almost gluttonous pile of 2025 stone fruits scored at the Farmers Market at Ivar in Hollywood. We're talking apricot/plum hybrids, Rainier cherries -- the sin just goes on and on.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 21

My fake cafe is OPEN and the Temple Coffee from Sacramento is HOT and my creativity is NOT so someone say something WILD for this damn Ellen Raskin/Kit Williams homage mashup I'm trying to write

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 18

Just look at this poor slow child working on the day of our lord

A small, neon-colored,plastic humanoid street figure bearing the message SLOW

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 13

Hey #birdsky: Check out this extremely pissed off mom bird who just wants me to get the hell out of her yard until her fledgling stops laying about on the ground. What kind of bird is this (I'm in Southern California) and how long until its ling fledges? @audubon.org @birdsoftheworld.bsky.social

A loud, angry mysterious sparrow-like bird sits under a canopy of ficus in Los Angeles. She has a gray breast, and a long tail with what appears to be a russet undercoat. Also a death stare.

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 11

As one does

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· May 8

Hey @helleborezine.bsky.social the spouse just gifted me a fresh stack of YOU. Gotta love the way he folk-horrored the Hades out of the wrap job!

A stack of Hellebore magazines, wrapped in white paper, sticks and twine. Not witchy A TALL

Hamm!@hammonddiehl· Apr 28

Thanks to Flame Tree Press for this very shiny author copy of its latest anthology! That’s Achilles on the front and me on page 137. If you’re as obsessed with Greek mythology as I am, treat yourself to this one