Jab

@jab2099

Hey it’s me jabby. Once upon a time minicomic (Gdlu, others) and webcomic (MonkeyDogSnakeHuman) person. Former ring announcer, care advocate, and appletini drinker. Now I just play a lot of video games. Glasgow/NY

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Bluesky

gamer

¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y jab2099.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Jab@jab2099· 11d

Jab@jab2099· 28d

Anyone got around $230 so I can buy a trelane action figure #TrekSky

Jab@jab2099· Jul 19

Really a Jalen Brunson Roman reigns shirt really were doing this really I’m buying it really??? I feel so dirty.

Jab@jab2099· Jul 18

Games beaten ‘26 #15 Star Wars: Outlaws (ps5) It’s not gta, u won’t be stealing landspeeders from Rodians. But it is standard Ubisoft stuff on map gameplay and if u r ok with that you’re good. Great sense of outer rim feel. Glitchy, buggy n jumping is a pain. Longest credits ever. Still, enjoyed.

Jab@jab2099· Jul 4

Just too long to copy/paste, but not to photo/copy/paste. Happy forf.

America is now 250 and based on who you ask we've had democracy for either 198 years or 172 years of them. Either way, people are going to celebrate, so who better to give some holiday tips than me, someone who left and gets to watch from afar like a kid sick at home watching Maury. Unfortunately UK, yes you are the father. Yup it’s a thread.

Choosing the right flag. Be it classic American, the very brave yellow don't tread on me, or hip and modern revisionist confederate, make sure you hang your favorite Shein bought sweatshop sewn celebration apparel to drape around your shoulders like America's hero - Superman, who came from another planet to...wait wait, he was adopted in Kansas -- wait you mean he wasn't born in America? America's hero Batman. That's it. Batman is way more America anyway.

Grilling. Don't even worry about those over-reachy government seals of 'safety'. The bear you found in the park is fine. Shoo the flies away and pour some stagnant stream water on that. That's country marinating!

Activities. Don't. Clean. Your. Pool. You need to get that thing funky and green. Get that scum layer right at the top. The swamp might be drained, but the pool is much harder.

Family. It's only natural that at a family event you're going to have to see some family members you don't want to, and that might lead to some bickering, or 'debate'. You know you're going to own them, they of course have not done their own research like you did on chat gbt. But the best tip is just sit back and shut up. Thoughts are hard if you have to think of them on your own. Let your brain worm, the parasite you ingested somehow (vaxxed?) do the talking for you. Don't fight it. They might look at you strange (again?) but trust me, it's them.

Fireworks. Everyone loves fireworks. That's why we celebrate! To see the explosions, the bright lights and loud sounds since they won't show too much of the not a war on tv. Sure the little kids in another country are scared, but what about your cockapoo? What about Sniffles? Well buck the hell up Sniffles, today you're a patriot. Strap on that little red white and blue anxiety vest like a kid in Kevlar.

The Heat. Damn it's hot out. Hey guess what? Too bad! That's the planet! It'll sort itself out. At least you still got to type the words 'me, cool, dinosaur' to create a crappy image that looks like every other soulless image. In the future it'll be all nostalgic and your grandkids will tell their grandkids they didn't need to wear the piss-suits that converted waste to cooling water; they'd all gather around the town data center and splash in the lukewarm brown runoff from a loosened wall spigot.

If those family members keep whining, just make sure to keep lots of frozen water around, and make sure ice goes in the bin where it belongs.

Here's to possibly 2 more years of whatever this is before we pretend democracy is back! Happy 4th!

Jab@jab2099· Jun 21

#Knicks

Jab@jab2099· Jun 21

#Knicks #KnicksSky

Jab@jab2099· Jun 18

Here’s this thing

Jab@jab2099· Jun 18

Games beaten ‘26 #14 ST:VOY- across the unknown (steam) Been chippin away at this one for a while and finally got em home. I loved it, but it is a very specific type of game that only works I think if you love trek and can tolerate resource mgmt. I killed tuvix. Would love a ds9 vr of this.

Jab@jab2099· Jun 7

Jab@jab2099· Jun 5

Games beaten ‘26 #13 Pragmata (ps5) Solid game! It’s short but has collecty bits to pad, and not too tough. A little re, dead space and a tiny bit death stranding. Hacking gimmick is fluid once I got the hang. And lord a stunner of a game when it wants. Fun fun. It’s just a good sandwich.

Jab@jab2099· May 31

This tracks

Jab@jab2099· May 23

Jab@jab2099· May 14

Games beaten ‘26 #12 Aliens (arc) I busted out the arcade stick for this. Fun aliens experience, and not long enough where things feel too repetitive (it comes close). Mom jeans not-ripley feels like a badass.

Jab@jab2099· May 10

Jab@jab2099· May 5

Jab@jab2099· May 2

Jab@jab2099· Apr 24

Jab@jab2099· Apr 22

Games beaten ‘26 #11 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (gba) I liked it well enough. Appreciated you had to use each bro, and liked the stages that switched it to autoscroll. Prob would have traded it back in back in the day.

Jab@jab2099· Apr 18

Oh yeah? Well the Record Store day called, THEY’RE running out of YOU! #RSD

Jab@jab2099· Apr 17

Games beaten ‘26 #10 Tmnt III: Radical rescue (gb/nsw) Wow this thing was kind of a metroidvania all smooshed down for the gb. Kinda short and small but that’s expected and I liked the unique turt abilities. Yea fun one.

Jab@jab2099· Apr 16

MY MUTUALS!

Jab@jab2099· Apr 10

Games beaten ‘26 #9 Tmnt II: back from the sewers (gba/nsw) It’s ok. I prefer the first one’s design better. The turtles just look weird from a straight side view.

Jab@jab2099· Apr 5

Found this ol thing

Jab@jab2099· Apr 4

Games beaten ‘26 #8 Tmnt: fall of the foot clan (gb/nsw) I unabashedly love this game. The sound, the big sprites, the levels, all of it. Total nostalgia of being sick and getting this for Xmas laid up in bed and playing the hell out of it. A personal bowl of (turtle) soup.

Jab@jab2099· Mar 28

Games beaten ‘26 #7 Tmnt III: The manhattan project (nsw) Wow! Sure it’s stiff but while it’s following the arcade style it feels all new. Wish I had played it back in the day, always wrote it off due to being nes, even then.

Jab@jab2099· Mar 26

Games beaten ‘26 #6 Tmnt II: the arcade game (nsw) For being a nes game it’s a decent home version to have. Fun back in the day, a little less fun now but hey the world is spoiled and I’m playing 30 year old games on a handheld device on my couch who the hell am I to judge. Where’s my hat?

Jab@jab2099· Mar 24

Jab@jab2099· Mar 21

Games beaten ‘26 #5 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (nsw) Just as cool and annoying as I remember. More palatable with rewind & save scumming. Nice to finally clear it. Enemies are sooo frustrating & what’s the point of using any turt than don other than displaying turtle fodder. Still, good mems.