Michele one L

@michelehowarth

Bridge burning grudge bearer. BuyMyFuckingBook™ direct from www.michelehowarth.com Instagram @wernerherzogmeets

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Michele one L@michelehowarth· 29d

I’ve been censored! #BUYMYF*****GBOOK™

My poster in the window of the pizza parlour that said BUY MY FUCKING BOOK has had the word fucking covered by a folded piece of paper.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jul 15

I have some free audiobooks to give away, should anyone want to read my fucking book™ with their ear holes. Just message me for a code. #EarHoleReadingIsProperReading

A screenshot from Audible of my novel Glitterballs, narrated by Stephen Hogan.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jul 7

Eric and Ern in the days when a heatwave saw little more than the loosening of a tie.

A black and white photograph of Eric Morcambe and Ernie Wise on the beach in Blackpool. They’re seated in deckchairs and are wearing white shirts and have their trousers rolled up. Ernie’s tie is slackened. You can see the Blackpool tower in the background along with an advert for oysters.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jul 4

Early 90s. With my then co-writer. Trying to write…

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jul 2

Not sure what happened in this room, but I fear it involved a gun. #EstateAgentPix

An empty room with brown patterned carpet and a wood burning stove. One wall is painted blue, the other is wallpapered. There is a piece of wood fixed to the wallpapered wall and three large red/brown stains trickle down underneath it.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jul 1

Someone’s giving away yellow Le Creuset pans on the local giveaway site and the whole town has lost its shit.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 26

I’m wondering what’s in the bucket... #EstateAgentPix

An estate agent’s photo of a toilet that appears to be covered in poo.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 24

Is that a Korat???

Two grey Korat cats - one with its back to the camera, the other walking straight towards it.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 24

I made my dog into a table lamp.

A ceramic table lamp base in the form of a small black and cream terrier type dog, with black spotted lampshade.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 23

My grandparents, togged up proper on the beach.

My grandmother and grandfather are sitting in deckchairs,behind a red striped windbreaker. My grandmother is wearing a pink coat, court shoes a beret and white earrings. She has a large white handbag next to her. My grandfather is wearing a suit and tie, socks and brogues. He appears to have a coat draped over the back of his deck chair.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 18

What’s he doing now???

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 16

So the local bookshop might not have been particularly supportive of my book, but the pizza place has got right behind it. #BuyMyFuckingBook™

The window of a pizza parlour is covered in various flyers and posters for events, including one that says BUY MY FUCKING BOOK along with a QR code for buying my novel Glitterballs.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 16

Don’t bother asking me for owt over the next week or so, cos I’m busy looking after this guy.

A baby jackdaw with a cocked head looking straight at the camera.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 13

I don’t want to buy this house, but I would quite like to meet the people who live there. #EstateAgentPix

An Estate Agent pic of an opulent sitting room, with a deep red theme. It has ruched red velvet curtains with tassel fringing - the ceiling has been covered in gathered red fabric also. The walls are wallpaper in red damask with a floral border. There are Victorian dolls, a parasol and many knickknacks.

An Estate Agent photograph of a bedroom with a beige and green colour scheme. It is dominated by a ruched fabric ceiling.

An Estate Agent photograph of a gold themed Bathroom, with lace curtains and a ruched fabric ceiling. Every surface is covered in decorative knickknacks.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 6

Been partying with one of my most favourite people on the planet. Happy 87th birthday Brucie.

Bruce Mitchell wearing a green velvet fez, a monocle and a badge that says BIRTHDAY WANKER.

Bruce Mitchell wearing a green velvet fez and holding up a black T-shirt that says STOP GOING ON ABOUT THE HACIENDA.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 6

Seems bookshop.org have decided to list my book again. They’ll probably change their minds so if you fancy supporting an indie bookshop, do it soon before they bump me again. Alternatively support an indie me & buy direct michelehowarth.com You’ll get it quicker & the code FACEFLANNEL gives 10% off.

A screenshot of Glitterballs on the bookshop.org to site.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 6

FUNERAL PIGEON UPDATE: She’s off to a wildlife sanctuary with her lover, where they’ll have a lot more space, while remaining safe, warm and fed. Anyone following her story who’d like to donate to the rescue who’ve kept her safe for the last nine months, can do so here: ko-fi.com/calderdalebi...

A grey and a white pigeon are together in a crate en route to their new life at a bird sanctuary.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 4

Visited friends from the States who were staying in a Jane Austen novel. #Derbyshire

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Jun 3

Morning shadows.

Vintage table lamp of an elegant woman in a pink and black lace dress, casting a shadow.

The shadow of a cat sitting on a window ledge behind a blue floral curtain.

The shadow of a table lamp, cast on a white wall.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 30

A child’s pavement drawing in chalk of a creature holding up their arms. A slice of pizza in one hand and a McDonald’s fries in the other. On the T-shirt it says ‘I heart food’. A small terrier type dog with a yellow harness is also in frame.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 29

Muttley

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 26

John Claridge the photographer died yesterday. Here’s his Tommy Cooper. If you didn’t know his work, check him out. He was ace.

A grainy black-and-white photograph of the comedian Tom Cooper.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 24

Poor Cliff #FreeLibrary

A free outdoor library has three books on Cliff Richard and an Andrew and Fergie royal wedding album.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 21

I don’t know how you’ve been spending your evening, but I’ve been updating the metadata for my ISBNs and teasing horsehair.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 15

Your dog collects sticks and socks. Mine collects mensches. #MickHead

Mick Head, standing behind a small terrier type dog called Herzog.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 10

Ticks all my boxes. #EstateAgentPix

A seemingly abandoned farmhouse kitchen. A wooden chair is alongside an old stove with a kettle on it. There are black soot marks up the wall.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 6

I don’t know what you’ve been doing today but we’ve got a house viewing tomorrow so of course I’m burying St Thomas upside down in the front garden.

A small plastic figurine of St Thomas is half buried upside down in some soil.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· May 1

John and Pat, at temporary traffic lights, living the dream.

A motorhome is stopped at temporary traffic lights. The back door has a cartoon of a happy couple which says JOHN AND PAT LIVING THE DREAM.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Apr 24

Been to London. Bought a book, banana and four buttons.

A table on a train with a banana skin, four buttons and Umberto Eco’s ‘how to spot a fascist’ book.

Michele one L@michelehowarth· Apr 22

My friend Jack lives in Vietnam and has the job of babysitting musicians passing through Ho Chi Minh City. He recently had to look after one of Manchester’s finest for a few days. I asked him how it went…