naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')

@nbdchouinard

naem d chouinard// they/he/whatever // occasionally a scrub daddy // denendeh slash yellowknife

991 Siguiendo305 Seguidores213 Publicaciones

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naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 30

what if a milf was a boy

bathroom mirror selfie of naem. he/they are mediterranean-looking with slight stubble and thick round tortoise shell glasses. smiling slightly with one eyebrow barely raised. definite thirst trap intentions. plain white crew neck tee shirt with a navy blue Hawaiian style shirt with tan flowers unbuttoned & layered on top

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 29

I hate it when the algorithm knows something about me that I haven't realized yet.

the exasperated "I guess" meme. A hand-drawn black and white 2-panel comic shows a man looking grouchy crossing his arms in the first panel. In the second panel he tosses his arms up with a speech bubble that says "I guess". His expression is exasperation. On the first panel, there is obviously edited text added above the man crossing his arms that reads "Tiktok: You find juggling ...kinda hot?" (to which the response is "I guess")

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 27

Todd in the shadows sometimes talks about a "music moment of the year" and for me, its riiiight about here.

the lyrics of verse 2 of Dashboard, by Noah Kahan, with one line circled in red.
it reads:

[Verse 2]
All your new friends look a lot like your last
I wonder why
Took all those loose ends, made 'em sandalwood beads 'round your neck
(circled in red) Douche

[Pre-Chorus]
Just when you think that the road's straight ahead
When the Devil shows up on your dashboard again

[Chorus]
Look at you go, crossin' state lines with your shadow

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 14

the duality of man

text message thread with [redacted] Chouinard. her messages read: "I just pooped out water basically", & "That's what I get for making Alfredo with 35% cream". to which I responded at 20:56 with "free enema!". time in the top left hand corner shows 20:57

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· May 2

you might think that men's locker room talk is all misogyny, but you'd be surprised to learn it's actually even more misogyny than you'd expect

the four panel Gru meme. Gru presents information on a whiteboard, his hands gesturing in a cartoonishly villainous way. Panel one: the whiteboard reads "I realize I'm transgender", panel two: the whiteboard reads "I physically transition", panel three: the whiteboard reads "I'm accepted as "one of the guys" ", panel four: the whiteboard reads "I'm accepted as "one of the guys" " but now Gru is looking at the whiteboard with an expression of concern & dread. Gru (from Despicable Me) is a stocky, bald man with a black zip up trench coat, a long hook nose, wide shoulders and fairly square body.

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Apr 27

why did they use this picture

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Apr 2

what in the Friday Fade happened here

SportsNet NHL Live Tracker Final Score Data. Canucks: 8, Avalanches: 6. A recap summary below reads "Boeser has hat trick, last-place Canucks overcome blowing 4-goal lead to beat NHL-leading Avs 8-6"

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Apr 1

my sister.... always the ally

a screenshot of two text messages from [redacted] Chouinard from 16:14 that read "I see u btw" & "I think I'm a day late"

an interac direct deposit screenshot, that reads "Deposit Your Money, $1.00 CAD, From: [redacted] CHOUINARD" and a list of financial institutions below

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Mar 31

visible time bitches

a photo of me (naem d chouinard) taking a selfie in a bathroom mirror. I'm doing the rock-on shape with my hand & smiling slightly. I'm olive skinned with black wavy mullet, big brown, circular glasses, and stubble that would only make Shaggy from Scooby-Doo proud. I've got on a black muscle tank and a gold Palestine necklace, and the phone I'm holding has orange flowers on the popsocket.

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Feb 9

merry christmas toronto

a screenshot of an article from the TTC website. the headline reads "Now Open: Line 5 Eglinton" and has a picture of Line 5 (The Orange Line) below the headline. the article is cut off but starts "Line 5 Eglinton is 19 kilometres of light rail transit connecting customers along Eglinton..."

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Nov 8

happy seasonal affective disorder season. here is a recipe for my depression soup. no prep, no chopping, one pot. ready in 15 minutes. contains veg and protein. bon appetit

a screenshot of a Facebook message in response to "share me your soup recipes fam"

"goated lentil soup (makes 2-4 servings):
1 can of lentils (or 1 cup of dried lentils), 150g of chopped frozen spinach, 1/2-3/4 cup of pasta, 2x boullion cubes.

while waiting for 4 cups of water to boil. put 150g of spinach in the microwave for 3 minutes, when waters boiled, add 2 bouillon cubes, lower heat to medium high, add canned lentils with some of the lentil water, (if dry, simmer with lid on for 10 minutes), squeeze some water out of the spinach before adding it in, bring back to a boil, add pasta and cook per pasta box instructions"

a second message reads "I call it depression soup bc there's no chopping, no prep, ready in 15 and only uses 1 pot"

the group chat name is cut off, but is readable as Communist Chouina–

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Oct 14

we will not relent. those pasta fuckers have had it too good for too long

a tweet from Dean Browning (@DeanBrowningPA) from January 18th 2021, that reads: "The Left loves to show their anti-Italian bigotry every time Christopher Columbus is brought up.

It never, ever ends."

the tweet has 291 tweets, 1593 Quote Tweets and 930 likes.

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Sep 13

hey audio drama locals horror panel with @parkdalehaunts.bsky.social 's Emily Kellogg! come thru Hamilton Central Library, Oct 2

a poster for "Fright Fest Horror Panel". Thursday Oct 2, 6:30PM, Central Library featuring Ai Jiang, Andrew F Sullivan, Emily Kellogg & Emily A Weedon (with photos for everyone). the logos on the bottom are for Epic Books, grit lit, Hamilton Public Library, & Author Series

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Sep 3

I'm sure this is on bsky but I've not seen it yet anyways preach king

a quote tweet from Mohamad Fakih, C.M. of a Philip Proudfoot tweet from Aug 25. The original tweet reads "Israel bombs Palestinian civil defense, live on air, as they try to recover the body of a journalist, Hossam Al-Masri, who was killed in an Israeli strike on Nasser Hospital." with a video attached. Mohamad Fakih's quote tweet reads "On behalf of literally every Canadian of conscience: if you are a Canadian and a supporter of Israel, you do not have basic human values, let alone Canadian values. Your tweets and messages are saved and known to all of us. They live. Some might not comment around you, because they are polite or respectful of whatever role you have in society or just don't want to roll in the mud with you. But know this: your lack of Canadian and human values will never be forgotten. #cdnpoli"

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 27

he rly is the blueprint

a gif of Jeremy Brett's Sherlock Holmes swinging a cane over his shoulder, cocking his hip. He is dressed in 1890s day wear, and looks fine as hell.

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Jun 22

the 3-panel "every day I wake up" meme from marriage story. Adam Driver, crying, says "every day I wake up" then punches the wall and covers his face sobbing. The third panel is labelled "[criying]"

naem (rhymes with 'mayhem')@nbdchouinard· Apr 17

see also: an acute explanation as to why Canada's "Boycott America" movement lowkey pisses me off after 2 years of ignoring calls to boycott Israeli apartheid