Elle basically IS a forklift, so..... Art by @tabbiewolf.bluestripedboxers.com

Can I just go back to sleep now?

Is trading plushies for the night the plushophilia version of swinging?

Oklahomo

Using the polishing wheel to buff @loosf.bsky.social's genitals to a mirror finish

Alternatively, Naked-except-blazer-and-shoes party

Formalwear-but-only-from-the-waist-up party

OH MY GOD THIS IS TOO RELATABLE

Showering with Mom and Dad.

Piranha beetles....

I love the idea of Alice getting her husband all wound up with teasing then making him finish himself off while she watches. Of course she always makes it up to him later

Oh he DEAD dead

Imagine: Tony looking out of the kitchen window of his Seattle condo, enjoying the view of Puget sound as his dad/partner pounds his prostate.

I had Covid once. I've had the flu. I had food poisoning. All those lasted more than a day

@tabbiewolf.bluestripedboxers.com

Fun fact the polo shirt was actually invented so you wouldn't have to take your headphones off to get naked

Flat chested woman walking around in summer with open Hawaiian shirts

Well, the CDC has officially fallen

Is squrt pee? Let's find out by taste test!

*Cough* @tabbiewolf.bluestripedboxers.com *Cough*

*Diaper leaks on your front passenger seat*

Bra cash? ❌ Sock cash ❌ Sheath cash ✅

That feeling when the dick hits the back of your throat

Senator Chucklefuck wasting our time again

🎶If they day is done, and you want to hump buns 🎶 🎵Cocaine 🎵

I desperately need to suck a really fat dick

I created a fantasy culture around incest

And nobody was surprised

Giving hubby a handie in the hot tub while having drinks with your 20 something kids *right there*. They know but they don't say anything.

Or "You better not bring my mom home pregnant, again!"