On Top And Well Hung

@ontopandwellhung

Top secret, one of a kind Mardi Gras stuff in development. Launch date TBA, soon! (A non-bigoted company) 🏳️‍🌈🐶🎉

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On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· 27d

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There is no “gender war."
Women didn't take away men's right to vote. Women didn't ban men from education or property.
Women didn't write laws controlling men's bodies.
Women didn't build systems that stripped men of their freedom. The imbalance never ran both ways.
@sheinspiresstrength

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· 29d

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Screenshot of a tweet from @owennfa:

THE LABOR DEPARTMENT JUST DROPPED NEW WAGE DATA AND IT'S BRUTAL.
Corporate profits up 47% since 2020.
Worker wages up 12% in the same period.
Meanwhile groceries up 35%, rent up 40%, utilities up 28%.
Your paycheck grew 12%. Your bills grew 35%.
The math is simple: you're getting poorer every year even when you get a raise.
You can't budget your way out of this. The system is designed so your income can never catch up to your expenses.
That's not an accident. That's policy.
7:24 AM • 14 Jul 26 • 246K Views

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 27

Know what’s stupid? Trying to pack in 100g of protein while keeping sodium intake under 2300mg, & saturated fat intake as close as possible to, or under, 10g. Unrelated PSA: do mohawk maintenance BEFORE starting outdoor exercise regimen. 🙄 #lipoproteina #healthyeating #freshshave #mohawk

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 23

Okay, wrote out the recipe for real (except seriously, I don’t measure seasonings at all, just go by vibes).

Low-Fat/High Fiber Hash Type Thing
Prep all the veggies and assemble ingredients before starting the rice.

No-beef brown rice:
2 c brown rice
2.5 c water
1 tbsp Better Than Bouillon No-Beef base

Wash and drain rice, throw in rice cooker. Mix base into, stir thoroughly, dump it into the rice cooker and let ‘er rip. (This depends on how you cook rice - you’re going to need more water if you cook it on the stove top. The base ratio is 1 tsp/1 c water. I round up.)

For the turkey disguised as beef:
1.5 lb lean ground turkey
1/2 cup dry red wine
1.5-2 tbsp red miso paste (optional, but really kicks up the beefy flavor)
2ish tbsp low-sodium soy sauce
1 tsp liquid smoke
1 tsp extra virgin olive oil
Salt and black pepper to taste

Heat large sauté pan over med to med-high heat, add olive oil. When the oil’s hot, add all ingredients, break up the turkey & stir to mix it all together. Cook til turkey’s cooked through. much of the liquid should also be cooked off. Drain turkey, set aside. Discard cooking liquid & fat. Immediately start cooking the hash type thing.

The Hash Type Thing:
1 tsp extra virgin olive oil
1 onion, diced
1 red bell pepper, diced
1 green bell pepper, diced
4-5 crimini (or whatever) mushrooms, washed, dried, and diced
1 can each black & kidney beans, drained and rinsed
2 10oz bags frozen cubed sweet potatoes, thawed
1/2 C or so dry red wine
1/2 - 3/4 C water + 1tsp Better Than Bouillon No-Beef base, mixed thoroughly
Cajun seasoning
Italian seasoning
Garlic powder
Red pepper flakes
Salt and pepper to taste

Throw remaining olive oil into pan, then add peppers, onion, mushrooms, salt and pepper. Cook over med to med-high heat til the veggies are softening but still a little firm. Add the turkey, beans, wine, water + no-beef base and cook for about 5 min. Throw in the seasonings, use your gut.

Add in the thawed sweet potatoes, stir it up, cover, reduce heat and simmer til the sweet potatoes are cooked through.

Serve over the rice, et voilà!

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 22

Diet had to change to high fiber, low fat (get your Lipoprotein (A) tested, ppl), so I give you a sort of hash type thing that I threw together. Ground turkey, onion, mushrooms, bell peppers, sweet potatoes, black & kidney beans. No-beef brown rice to go with it. Recipe in alt text, it’s gooooood.

Large sauté pan full of ground turkey (that looks like beef because I’m semi-vegan and know how to make anything taste like beef), onions, red & green bell peppers, diced mushrooms, cubed sweet potato, black beans, and kidney beans.

Throw 2 cups washed & strained brown rice and 2.5 c water mixed with 1tbsp Better Than Bouillon No-Beef Base into your rice cooker. Let ‘er rip.

Cook 1lb extra lean ground turkey with like a tiny splash of extra virgin olive oil, about half a cup of DRY red wine, 2-ish tbsp soy sauce, 2 tbsp red miso paste, maybe a tsp of liquid smoke, salt & pepper to taste. When it’s cooked through and much of the liquid has cooked off, drain it! Don’t bother reserving any of the fatty liquid. Set the ground turkey aside.

Throw a tiny splash of olive oil into the pan and (over med-med-high heat) toss in a diced onion, a small red bell pepper, a green bell pepper - both diced, and 4 or 5 diced crimini mushrooms. Add salt & pepper to taste and stir occasionally while this shit cooks - I didn’t pay attention to how long, but the veggies were getting soft but still a little firm.

Drain and rinse your beans (I used 1 can of each).

Add the turkey, beans, more (DRY - not sweet! Cannot emphasize this enough!) red wine (I did this by feels so… 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Cook for about 5 min over medium-highish heat. Season however you want - I used:

Cajun seasoning
Italian seasoning (because I’m lazy and am running low on several herbs)
Garlic powder (again, too hot & lazy to bother chopping another ingredient)
Roasted red pepper flakes

Add in 2 10oz bags of frozen sweet potatoes that you thawed out 2 days ago and forgot about. Stir it up, cover, and let it simmer til the sweet potatoes are cooked through.

When the rice cooker stops, let it go for 5 min, then remove it from the cooker & fluff it up.

I don’t measure most of what I do when I cook, other than the rice/water stuff and the Better Than Bouillon, so go with your gut and your taste buds.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 13

Aaaand there goes the tarp. #kennedycenter #fragileego

Tarp going up on the scaffolding at the Kennedy Center at 1:12am

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 10

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On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 6

The harsh reality of a post workout stretch with a pit bull. #pittsky #awareness

Robert Redford (not that one, my red pit bull) lays right up against me while I stretch on my back on the floor.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jun 6

I give you my ridiculous cartoon dog who always ends up catching flies in his sleep, Robert Redford, aka Red, Bubby, Bubba, Bub, Bubstep, Bubba Hotep, Hubba Bubba, & Bippity Boppity Bub (last one is always sung). I have hundreds of pics of him sleeping 🤭

My red mostly pit bull (little splash of bull terrier), Robert Redford, laying on a pink blanket while looking to the left of the camera. His lip is smushed up toward his left and his tiny front teeth are visible.

Same dog, same pink blanket, but he’s asleep on his right side with his muzzle on my socked foot and swaddled in the blanket. His mouth is open and his tongue’s out a little.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jan 27

Made a huge mess of a king cake. Triple stranded, 2 cinnamon brown sugar filled, 1 lemon-cream cheese filled. It’s cerebral, no? Dr Maw Maw commented, “This is your brain on Mardi Gras.”

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Jan 2

Another sad year of no #neworleans for me, but can’t afford to buy overpriced, subpar king cake in NC, either. So I tested out a cinnamon brioche recipe. Notice it’s red and pink. That’s because it’s definitely not #kingcake. I don’t want to call up misfortune 😜

Braided brioche ring covered in cream cheese frosting and heavily dusted in red and pink sugar on an old Pfalzgraff Village platter that’s just a wee bit too small.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 13

Our house hippos are twins (apparently in their talents as well as looks)

Robert Redford, my large red pit bull, sits on my husband’s lap on a chair that isn’t big enough.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

Pics in daylight

Weeping angel atop a Christmas tree, hands over her face

The same weeping angel, exposing her face

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

And here’s awesome after

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

Oh. I CAN post vids. #perimenopausebrain strikes again 🙄 Anyway, here’s blah before

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

And here she is on the tree with her attack face exposed. I wish I could post a vid, I’m most proud of the difference in arm and wing movement. #weepingangeltreetopper #onceagothalwaysagoth #doctorwho #weepingangel #don’tblink #theyrefast #christmastree #treetopper #upcycle #beforeandafter

Weeping angel tree topper with her arms away from her attack face. It’s once again a pretty terrible quality pic.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

I spent very little time on her face. (I just realized I forgot her tongue.) It’s an 8’ tree, her face is small, & I figured it wouldn’t take much to get the idea across. Facing facts, anyone who’s a Doctor Who fan is going to know exactly what she is. #morbid #christmashorror

Close up of the weeping angel’s face and chest. I’ve painted her in shades of grey and more or less managed to change her expression from boring white European angel to weeping angel attack face. It’s just good enough, but I kind of love her.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Dec 1

Took a break from #ontopandwellhung to deck the halls. I got this animated topper in 93 or 94 @ Boscov’s, where I was a visual merchandiser. I used it nearly every year since, but my spawn hate it and last year revolted. Tonight on a whim I modified her. Here’s the #before #treetopper deets in alt

A now vintage angel tree topper. She’s white, with porcelain head and hands, and strawberry blonde short flowy hair. She’s holding a “candle” in one hand and wearing an off white satin dress with bishop sleeves, dumb fake pearls, and a terrible gold bow that extends from the waist to the hem. She has padded wings. When plugged in, her arms & wings open and close while her head turns side to side. Her candle lights up and she also has lights under her dress.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 30

I adopted my 75lb pibble when my daughter’s now ex-fiancé & my Jack Russel mix granddog lived w/us. My guy learned small dog tricks, such as zooming under the dining room chairs in a circle, uppies, & sitting on laps in too small chairs. He’s sure there’s room.

My husband holding our small Jack Russel mix granddog (Ollie) while sitting on a dining room chair. Our large red pit bull is pathetically asking to join in for uppies on the lap.

My husband struggling to hold our large red pit bull (Robert Redford) on the same dining room chair. Robert Redford’s looking at me with a face that clearly says, “Mom, Dad’s not doing it right - I need you to stop what you’ve been doing for the past hour and start giving me uppies instead.” (He’s a mama’s boy)

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 28

It’s come to my attention that ppl online think I’m a dude. Maybe great marketing, but I don’t want to deceive or mislead anyone. My apologies to the truly sweet gay men who took the name literally - I am in fact an old lady w/a crude sense of humor. #ontopandwellhung #oldlady #notaman #sorryboys

I’m an aging white woman lounging against green pillows and a pink blanket, under a large headed red pitbull. I have long, curly black hair that’s rapidly greying and brown eyes. I have a nostril, septum, and Monroe piercings, all with gold jewelry. I’m wearing black v-neck tshirt that says “READING IS FUN” on top of a pentagram with a goat head reading a satanic bible.

Robert Redford, my red pit bull, looking shocked

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 28

You’ve just died. 6th picture in your gallery is what killed you. 😭😭😭 I must have died from the grief of having missed it.

Screenshot of Heilung’s last ritual, at Dalhalla, Sweden. Former quarry, natural amphitheater, with water around the stage and large rock walls surrounding it. Trees are atop the rocks. There are fire and smoke effects on the stage. The seats are absolutely packed. I was not there 😭

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 27

You know the thing about rose colored glasses? 1. It’s true, everything does look nicer with them on (had a pair of pink-lensed sunglasses in 1998). 2. Hot pink drapes on east facing windows make for happier mornings. #nofilter #seealttext #whiteroomssuck #thanksgivingisalie #historywaswhitewashed

Breakfast nook: window to the left covered in colorfully striped curtains, window in front covered in hot pink curtains that the morning sun is shining through and turning everything a pinkish red. Along the left wall is the corner of a butcher block, an old 70s kitchen chair, a bookshelf with plants on top, and a 1956 pink Frigidaire range. Along the back wall is a small 1950s formica table also covered in plants, and to the right is a counter that separates the breakfast nook from the kitchen. There’s a full wall that extends the width of two cabinets. There are three bar stools along the counter, with open cabinets underneath. The hanging light is a large old slag glass tulip light, every petal is a different color (and it matches the striped curtains, which was why we bought the light). The floor is an ugly cheap ass white ceramic tile that destroys anything that a klutz like me drops on it and I hate it. But it reflects the pink-red curtain filtered morning sunlight beautifully, I’ll give it that.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 25

Omg WHAT a face! I definitely have more pics of Robert Redford than of my kids (but my kids are all adults so I feel zero guilt 😁)

My red pit bull, Robert Redford, curled up into a tight ball asleep between my black scrubs-clad legs. There’s a yarn bowl with orange-yellow yarn in it and a tiny sweater knitting project on one of my legs.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 19

Added alt text Also, to everyone saying that the women journalists should have spoken up, too: Yes, truly, but think about who you’ve seen videos of standing up for women over the past few yrs. It’s ALMOST ALWAYS other women. Men need to get it the fuck together.

Post by verobond of photo of Trump talking to reporters on Air Force one, with emboldened caption underneath:

Every male reporter who sat in Air Force One and said nothing when Trump said
"quiet piggy" to a female Bloomberg reporter is absolutely part of the problem.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 17

#ASongOrMovieForTypesOfCars The Thing (zero effort)

Blu Ray case for John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982). A human shape in a parka has bright light blasting out of the hood and is surrounded by snow and ice

White and blue Volkswagen Thing with a black convertible top and blue wall tires

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 16

I’m so close to getting back to my OnTop&WellHung project! Have a few touch ups on the shirt to do once the lettering’s dry, but that’s it. #JuiceWRLD #painting #oilpainting #portraitpainting #wip #art #artist #commissionedart #artcommission

Almost finished painting of Juice World in a bright yellow Ransom t-shirt, with a spot light shining down from the upper right through pink and purple smoke machine smoke.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 14

My nephew calls him a cartoon… because he’s consistently ridiculous. See alt text for context 😂 🐶

My red pitbull, Robert Redford, sits on my husband’s lap on a dining room chair. He is not a small pittie, but is sure that he’s the same size as his Jack Russel nephew, and therefore demands the same uppies. On this day, I’d been cleaning and repairing a sewing a machine for a few hours, which were hours not spent cuddling him, hence his pathetic look at me. That look is saying, “Do you see this? Dad had to give me uppies since you’re busy, and he’s not doing it right. I hope you’re happy. I may die.”

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 14

The dog in question, who acts like he’s dying if he’s not touching me

My red pitbull is sleeping on our bed with his head resting on my sock-clad foot.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 14

Turns out I didn’t finish this #painting yet because my dog’s been extra clingy. Almost there - but now there’s some #glitter included because like a dumbass I did some blending w/a poofy brush that I last used to brush loose glitter off of my secret project.🙄 #art #wip #oilpainting #juicewrld

Painting in progress of Juice WRLD in a bright yellow t shirt with “Ransom” on the front, with a spotlight shining down from the upper right corner through swirly pink and purple smoke machine fog.

On Top And Well Hung@ontopandwellhung· Nov 10

There’s an alien in my house! #invasion #aliens #hashslingingslasher #theood