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Bea (local failure, local girl) (@pageoflife413) · DIRTY

Bea (local failure, local girl)

@pageoflife413

professional funny little guy - 27 born to dilly dally, forced to participate in capitalism :( (icon drawn by @c0rps3g0bbl3r.bsky.social, i'm shilling for him out of love borne from my own heart)

697 Siguiendo232 Seguidores328 Publicaciones

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Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· May 23

i thought we were all joking,,,

my own attempt to make the Google ai respond in the voice and manner of the bog pervert. it is as follows:

*Gaaaaasp.* Oh myyy. Is it you? Down here in the murky, mossy, deep? let me adjust my thick glasses. *Heavy wheezing.* Yesss... the murky waters are where all the best little secrets bubble to the surface. What kinda dirty little query have you got for me today, huh? Come closer to the slime... don't be shy! *Sigh.*

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· May 6

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Mar 15

everywhere I go, I see his face...

a framed photo of Doug Walker in his Nostalgia Critic outfit (composed of a black suit, white t-shirt, a loose red tie, a black cap, and of course, a Gun). it's signed by Doug Walker himself and has a written message: Best Arcade Ever!

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Mar 3

here's a photo of my cat where her head looks Stupid Big

a black cat standing atop a doorframe. she is approaching the camera, which makes her head look comically large compared to her body.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Dec 25

and a bonus video, for goofs!

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Dec 25

not sure if you're a cat guy, but check out the local goobers!

three cats (a black cat, grey cat, and brown cat) sleeping on a bed. each of them are curled up and very close to one another.

a brown cat sleeping on top of a computer chassis, with her head resting against the wall. her back paws dangle over the edge of the chassis

a grey cat curled up and sleeping in a bowl shaped attachment to a cat tree.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Nov 28

*to the tune of Band on the Run* soup on the mail, soup on the mail

a lone can of Campbell's soup (distinguished by the red and white design on the can) sitting on a gray set of mail boxes.

the same soup can, but close enough to see that it's a can Chicken Noodle soup

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Oct 3

here are some photos of my cat Luna perched on top of a door, like a little freak

my black cat Luna, standing on top of a door. she's craning her head down, seemingly to sniff the corner of the door

another photo of luna, this time with the lens much closer to her head, to give the appearance that she has a comically large head and tiny body.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Aug 10

cat ouroboros #cats

two tabby cats, one light gray and the other a darker gray, laying down on each other, with their heads by each other's back legs, making an oval shape

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jun 14

I am proving to myself I can cope with fucked up circumstances one omelette at a time

the omlette in question sitting on a plate. there's some ham, cheese, tomato, and onion in there.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jun 3

my partner and I made some good-looking ramen the other day!

bowl one of Ramen, topped with potatoes, a cylindrical fish cake, several smaller narutomaki (white circular fish cakes with a pink swirl in the middle), green onions, chunks of pork and pickled cucumbers.

bowl two of ramen, topped similarly to the first! in this photo, the narutomaki is slightly more visible amidst the potatoes, cucumbers, green onions, and pork.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· May 10

I couldn't bring myself to put these stickers somewhere, so I followed my partner's suggestion to make them into magnets!

a photo of my desk! five stickers (now magnets) sit atop it. they're all animals (a duck, a rabbit, a bear, a dog, and a chick) in a cutesy, chibi style. the stickers are thick, and contain some gel and glitter inside them.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Dec 17

"In my restless dreams, I see that town..." (aka: what I think every time there's fog)

A photo of several black cylindrical train cars linked together on the tracks. One car is in the center of the photo, framed on the left and right by trees that have mostly bare branches, and at the bottom of the photo, there is some shrubbery with leaves that are turning yellow. The background of the photo is partially obscured by the fog, and several trees (which are equally bare) can be faintly seen in the distance.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Nov 29

h-hatsune miku?

a book on drawing manga & anime, with some of the standard stylistic trappings on its cover. these include a featureless figure in a sketchy style in an action pose, with one fist extended out towards the viewer; a full body reference of a buff anime guy with purple spiky hair [don't worry he has underwear on]; a bust of a different brown haired anime girl holding up a peace sign; a chibi styled stage magician girl winking and holding up playing cards; a larger design for an SAO reminiscent character in adventuring gear with both casual clothes and some lightweight armor for her arms and legs. Also, Hatsune. Fucking. Miku! Just vibing in the corner, quite literally the first image i found when searching her name from the vocaloid wiki. for the unfamiliar, Miku has light skin and long teal hair typically put in two pigtails, with various small tech and music based accessories that hint at her background as a vocaloid (singing synthesizer). these include a screen panel on one of her sleeves, a headset with a microphone on it, tall boots that have piano key shaped designs closest to miku's thighs, and a black skirt with what looks to be some ports for midi cables.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Oct 19

saw the moon between trees and struggled to get good pics, please enjoy! #photography

a photo of the moon at night, with the moon being the only clear subject of the photo. the photo is clear enough to see the difference between darker and lighter areas of the moon's surface.

a second photo of the moon at night, similar to the first, with a telephone pole and wire partially covering the bottom left of the moon

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Sep 20

heh. goodnight goon

a small children's board book, titled Goodnight Goon: a petrifying parody. I am afflicted with terminal brainrot, and thought this was so funny that I bought it. the cover depicts the titular goon standing at a window during nighttime, staring inside (a reference to the window depicted in Goodnight Moon, the original work). inside are monsters of various sizes and colors, including a small green lizard like creature and a small frog like creature hiding in curtains. other notable monsters include a red creature with yellow polka dots and tentacles, a large, hairy green arm reaching out from the floor, and a funny little slug guy resting on the mantle of a fireplace.

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Sep 19

whoag

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jul 21

am i enjoying the 7 dollar purchase i made? yeah! this is great! i'm wearing my knee socks with these and it rocks!

a picture of the predator handshake meme, which depicts a close up on the biceps of two men, with their hands clasped together. one side of the handshake is labeled biking "shorts", and the other is labeled "me". in smaller text at the bottom, the words "they feel nice" is written

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jul 1

part 2

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jul 1

hey internet, if you happen to live in Chicago and want to go to Dimo's After Dark, (its at 1516 n damen ave) take my tickets (1/2)

Bea (local failure, local girl)@pageoflife413· Jun 29

him, presented by @terminalmontage.bsky.social

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