Micah

@rincewind

Recovering forum poster, politics doomer, basketball nerd. I write code for a living. He/him. Views entirely my own. Deputy Chair of the Ankh-Morpork Posters’ Guild 🏳️‍⚧️ rights are human rights

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Bluesky

gamer

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Micah@rincewind· 22d

Discworld QOTD, from Moving Pictures

“Now, there’s some new words I want you to learn,” said Gaspode. “Think you can?”
“I hope so.”
“‘Per-cent-age of the gross,’” said Gaspode. “There. Think you can remember it?”
“‘Per-cent-age of the gross,’” said Victor.
“Good lad.”
“What does it mean?”
“Don’t you worry about that,” said Gaspode. “You just have to say it’s what you want, OK. When the time’s right.”
“When will the time be right, then?” said Victor.
Gaspode grinned nastily. “Oh, I reckon when Dibbler’s just got a mouthful of food’d be favorite.”

Micah@rincewind· 23d

Discworld QOTD, from Unseen Academicals

“You see, the thing about football is that it is not about football. It is a most fascinating multi-dimensional philosophy, an extrusion, as it were, of what Doctor Maspinder promulgated in Das Meer von Unvermeidlichkeit. Now, you would say to me, I am sure,” he went on, “What of the 4–4–2 or even the 4–1–2–1–2, yes? And my answer to that would be, there is only the one. Traditionally we say there are eleven players in the team, but that is because of our rather feeble perceptions. In truth, there is only the one and therefore, I would say,” he gave a little laugh, “daring to adapt a line from The Doors of Deception: it does not matter whether you win or lose so long as you score the most goals.”

Micah@rincewind· 23d

I am four eels energy (complimentary)

I’m sorry Ms Jackson (ooo)

I am four eels

Never meant to make your daughter cry

I am several fish and not a guy

Micah@rincewind· 24d

I wish the Tate brothers a very

Chance

Go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200

Micah@rincewind· 24d

Discworld QOTD, from Soul Music

TELL ME, said Death, after a while, WAS I . . . WILL I BE . . . AM I A GOOD GRANDFATHER?
Susan bit her lip thoughtfully.
“If I tell you, won’t that be a paradox?”
NOT FOR US.
“Well . . . you’ve got bony knees.”
Death stared at her.
BONY KNEES?
“Sorry.”

Micah@rincewind· 24d

the iMac G3 remains Peak Computer Design to this day

Micah@rincewind· 25d

Discworld QOTD, from Feet of Clay

Another priest said, “Is it true you’ve said you’ll believe in any god whose existence can be proved by logical debate?”
“Yes.”
Vimes had a feeling about the immediate future and took a few steps away from Dorfl.
“But the gods plainly do exist,” said a priest.
“It Is Not Evident.”
A bolt of lightning lanced through the clouds and hit Dorfl’s helmet. There was a sheet of flame and then a trickling noise. Dorfl’s molten armor formed puddles around his white-hot feet.
“I Don’t Call That Much Of An Argument,” said Dorfl calmly, from somewhere in the clouds of smoke.

Micah@rincewind· 26d

Discworld QOTD, from Pyramids

“Right. Good. So noon would be age 35, am I right? Now considering that most children can toddle at a year or so, the four legs reference is really unsuitable, wouldn’t you agree? I mean, most of the morning is spent on two legs. According to your analogy—” he paused and did a few calculations with a convenient thighbone—“only about twenty minutes immediately after 00:00 hours, half an hour tops, is spent on four legs. Am I right? Be fair.”
“Well—” said the Sphinx.
“By the same token you wouldn’t be using a stick by six p.m. because you’d be only, er, 52,” said Teppic, scribbling furiously. “In fact you wouldn’t really be looking at any kind of walking aid until at least half past nine, I think. That’s on the assumption that the entire lifespan takes place over one day which is, I believe I have already pointed out, ridiculous. I’m sorry, it’s basically OK, but it doesn’t work.”

Micah@rincewind· 27d

Discworld QOTD, from The Wee Free Men

She’s a little know-it-all,” said Miss Tick.
“Right. Just like you. She impressed you, right? I know she did because you were quite nasty to her, and you always do that to people who impress you.”
“Do you want to be turned into a frog?”
“Well, now, let me see . . .” said the toad sarcastically. “Better skin, better legs, likelihood of being kissed by a princess one hundred percent improved . . . why, yes. Whenever you’re ready, madam.”

Micah@rincewind· 28d

mea culpa

I owe you an apology meme

Me to Spain after watching them dismantle the French attack the same way they did to everyone else’s all tournament

Micah@rincewind· 28d

Discworld QOTD, from Eric

Micah@rincewind· 29d

Discworld QOTD, from Interesting Times

The statue looked like porcelain. It had been painted quite realistically. One Sun Mirror seemed an ordinary sort of man. You would not have pointed him out in a crowd as Emperor material. But this man, with his little round hat and little round shield and little round men on little round ponies, had glued together a thousand warring factions into one great Empire, often using their own blood to do it.
Rincewind looked closer. Of course, it was just an impression, but around the set of the mouth and the look of the eyes there was an expression he’d last seen on the face of Ghenghiz Cohen.
It was the expression of someone who was absolutely and totally unafraid of anything.

Micah@rincewind· Jul 11

going to spend most of the day wandering around and bonking people with foam swords, minus the parts where I am hiding from the sun please do not burn anything down while I’m gone, at least within reason

me at LARP, holding two swords and wearing black leather armor over a red shirt

Micah@rincewind· Jul 11

Discworld QOTD, from Mort

“But you’re Death,” said Mort. “You go around killing people!”
I? KILL? said Death, obviously offended. CERTAINLY NOT. PEOPLE GET KILLED, BUT THAT’S THEIR BUSINESS. I JUST TAKE OVER FROM THEN ON. AFTER ALL, IT’D BE A BLOODY STUPID WORLD IF PEOPLE GOT KILLED WITHOUT DYING, WOULDN’T IT?

Micah@rincewind· Jul 10

Discworld QOTD, from Hogfather

Death looked down at the shape under the falling snow. Then he set the lifetimer on the air and touched it with a finger. A spark flashed across.
“You ain’t really allowed to do that,” said Albert, feeling wretched.
THE HOGFATHER CAN. THE HOGFATHER GIVES PRESENTS. THERE’S NO BETTER PRESENT THAN A FUTURE.

Micah@rincewind· Jul 9

Discworld QOTD, from Maskerade

Granny Weatherwax was firmly against fiction. Life was hard enough without lies floating around and changing the way people thought. And because the theater was fiction made flesh, she hated the theater most of all. But that was it—hate was exactly the right word. Hate is a force of attraction. Hate is just love with its back turned.

Micah@rincewind· Jul 9

in conclusion:

Micah@rincewind· Jul 8

I love how basically everyone who has to interact with Vetinari at any point has one of these “holy shit he’s even scarier than I thought” moments also, while this pic is actually a moment in Going Postal this scene always makes me think of one of favorite pieces of Discworld fanart ever, by Tealin

fanart of Vetinari pointing his cane, by Tealin

Micah@rincewind· Jul 8

Discworld QOTD, from The Truth

“It amazes me how the news you have so neatly fits the space available,” Lord Vetinari went on, staring down at the page Boddony was working on. “No little gaps anywhere. And every day something happens that is important enough to be at the top of the first page, too. How strange—oh, ‘receive’ takes an E after the C . . .”
Boddony looked up. Lord Vetinari’s cane swung around with a hiss and hovered in the middle of a densely packed column. The dwarf looked closer, and nodded, and took out a small tool.
It’s upside down to him, and back to front, thought William. And the word’s in the middle of the text. And he spotted it.

Micah@rincewind· Jul 6

Discworld QOTD, from Sourcery

$Examine Rincewind, as he peers around the sullen shelves. There are eight levels of wizardry on the Disc; after sixteen years Rincewind has failed to achieve even level one. In fact it is the considered opinion of some of his tutors that he is incapable even of achieving level zero, which most normal people are born at; to put it another way, it has been suggested that when Rincewind dies the average occult ability of the human race will actually go up by a fraction.$

Micah@rincewind· Jul 5

preparing for a USA goal tomorrow

Captain Haddock: billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles in a thundering typhoon!

Micah@rincewind· Jul 5

Discworld QOTD, from Snuff

Vetinari stood up and stared out of the window. “This is a city of beggars and thieves, Drumknott, is it not? I pride myself that we have some of the most skilled. In fact, if there were such a thing as an intercity thieving contest, Ankh-Morpork would bring home the trophy and probably everyone’s wallets. Theft has a purpose, Drumknott, but one intrinsically feels that while there are things by nature unavailable to the common man, there are also things not to be allowed to the rich and powerful.”

Micah@rincewind· Jul 5

let’s fucking go

Bank error in your favor monopoly card but instead it’s fifa corruption in your favor

Micah@rincewind· Jul 4

Discworld QOTD, from Wyrd Sisters

Nanny Ogg didn’t care much about what people knew and even less for what they thought, and lived in a new, knick-knack crammed cottage in the middle of Lancre town itself and at the heart of her own private empire. Various daughters and daughters-in-law came in to cook and clean on a sort of rota. Every flat surface was stuffed with ornaments brought back by far-traveling members of the family. Sons and grandsons kept the logpile stacked, the roof shingled, the chimney swept; the drinks cupboard was always full, the pouch by her rocking chair always stuffed with tobacco. Above the hearth was a huge pokerwork sign saying “Mother.” No tyrant in the whole history of the world had achieved a domination so complete.

Micah@rincewind· Jul 2

Discworld QOTD, from Guards! Guards!

“You’re right,” said Colon. “The thing about the captain, see, I read this book once . . . you know we’ve all got alcohol in our bodies . . . sort of natural alcohol? Even if you never touch a drop in your life, your body sort of makes it anyway . . . but Captain Vimes, see, he’s one of those people whose body doesn’t do it naturally. Like, he was born two drinks below normal.”
“Gosh,” said Carrot.
“Yes . . . so, when he’s sober, he’s really sober. Knurd, they call it. You know how you feel when you wake up if you’ve been on the piss all night, Nobby? Well, he feels like that all the time.”

Micah@rincewind· Jul 2

Speech bubble meme with Michael from The Good Place implying he is saying the quoted post

Micah@rincewind· Jul 1

Discworld QOTD, from Monstrous Regiment

Most of the vampire families were highly nobby. You never knew who was connected to who . . . not just to who, in fact, but to whom. “Whoms” were likely to be far more trouble than your common, everyday “who.” The sergeant was looking down a mile of rough road.

Micah@rincewind· Jun 30

rincewind understands that he is not intimidating and never will be, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be deeply disconcerting when he wants to also I feel like he would have appreciated The Expression

Micah@rincewind· Jun 30

Discworld QOTD, from The Light Fantastic

“Just clearing my throat,” said Rincewind, and grinned. He had put a lot of thought into that grin. It was the sort of grin people use when they stare at your left ear and tell you in an urgent tone of voice that they are being spied on by secret agents from the next galaxy. It was not a grin to inspire confidence. More horrible grins had probably been seen, but only on the sort of grinner that is orange with black stripes, has a long tail and hangs around in jungles looking for victims to grin at.

Micah@rincewind· Jun 29

Discworld QOTD, from Small Gods