Shaenon K. Garrity

@shaenon

Cartoonist and skiffy writer. 2022 Inkpot winner. Narbonic, Skin Horse, Willowweep Manor, Steam. Repped by Brent Taylor.

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comics writing

¿Es tu perfil?Reclámalo y shaenon.dirty.social es tuyo.Reclamar perfil

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 18d

“I know. It’s not much of a plan.” Carcosa tried to squat lower. Maybe shouldn’t have made herself so tall. Or dependent on oxygen. “If only we had backup.”

“You mean like some third person who’d come out of nowhere and rescue us right now?”

“That would be nice, Id.”

“Worth a try.” Id hopped up and down. “Hey! Any backup out there? Heeeelp!”

Carcosa started to tell her it was useless, but that would be a waste of oxygen and brainpower. She tried to think of a better plan. It was hard to concentrate over the roar of the fire and the sound of Id yelling, not to mention all the distracting panic-related neurotransmitters being released by her amygdala. Perhaps they could overturn the effigy. If they could tip it over onto Ambrose, at least she’d die satisfied.

It was impossible to think over this cacophony. Why couldn’t the Supper Club keep it down? They weren’t the ones being burned alive.

Come to think of it, the shouting outside was no longer organized chanting. It was getting louder and as panicked as Carcosa’s lower brain functions.

“Backup’s here!” cried Id.

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 19d

Taco smugglers

Now the roadster is being used for old timey taco smuggling

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 19d

“Sure I am,” says Carcosa. “Just because I have no idea what’s going on doesn’t mean I’m not smart.”

“I disagree.” Ambrose gestures with his phone. “Young ladies, I once wrote a story about a man who builds a chess-playing automaton. Was the automaton ‘smart’ simply because it knew how to move pieces about a board?”

“Probably,” says Carcosa.

“Heck yeah,” says Id, “and I bet it looked cool doing it.”

“Balderdash! It was smart because it murdered its creator, cleverly ridding the world of an arrogant and useless tinkerer.” Ambrose nodded in satisfaction. “A good story, and edifying to boot.”

“What’s your point?” says Carcosa.

“And what did the automathing look like?” says Id. “Did the guy paint a mustache on it? I love it when old-timey inventors do that.”

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 19d

What if some vintage fellows

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 19d

I hate drawing cars but what if I learn how to draw only 1939 Bantam roadsters and then all my comics will take place in a delightful universe where everyone drives Bantams

Sketch of a spiffy little roadster such as a 1930s comedy team would drive, or any given Keystone Kops

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

To research the plan, Carcosa had watched Western movies and looked at stills in movie books. The saloon looked like a film set from the outside, but the inside was dark, cramped, and unglamorous. A couple of men stood at a bar made from a plank balanced on barrels. A few more played cards around a rickety table. There was a baby grand piano, but nobody was playing it.

The men at the bar looked up when Carcosa and Id walked in. The men playing cards didn’t. The bartender said nothing because there was no bartender.

“This place could use some pianny music,” whispered Id. “Not piano. Pianny.”

“You’re welcome to provide some,” Carcosa whispered back. “Or try.”

“Okay.”

“I wasn’t serious—” But Id had already darted across the dark and dusty room. She sat down at the piano stool, cracked her knuckles, and descended upon the keys.

Pianny music tinkled out.

Carcosa gaped. “You can play the piano?”.

“Course not. I can play the pianny.”

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

Yesterday was Fallingwater, today it's Randyland. You need that Taleisin/House on the Rock balance.

Me at the gate of Randyland, an outsider arthouse in Pittsburgh. It's a lot.

Mosaic steps in Randyland, flanked by painted mannequins.

A telephone + a plastic dinosaur with a Barbie head.

One exterior wall of Randyland, covered in brightly painted murals. More mannequin parts. Miscellany.

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

Pittsburgh is a place where you go to an arepa cafe and the reading options are a zine called Southern Gothicc Futurist or the novelization of SpaceCamp In other words it's Rust Belt Portland and it rules Also they're called n'arepas

Four issues of Southern Gothicc Futurist

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

I went in this blacklight bike gear room that plays "Girl or Goddess" when you enter and did the ending of Beau Trevail and now I am cleansed

I donlt know what else to tell you, it's a blacklight bike gear room and also now the interior if my heart

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

So many lines to put on my tombstone

BROUGHT TO A JUNK YARD FOR SCRAP

SAVED AND TO REST HERE IN BICYCLE HEAVEN

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 20d

Bicycle Heaven has saved my soul

The exterior of Bicycle Heaven in Pittsburgh, a bike repair shop that has metastasized its own museum

One of Pee-Wee's actual bikes from history's greatest movie

The parking meter that put Cool Hand Luke in prison for vandalizing parking meters

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 21d

“And Jello wrestling, but only once a year for fund-raising.” The girl scooped a perfect batch of golden fries out of the oil. “I’m Jojo.”

“Id. Carcosa. This is a side hustle. Mainly, we’re time travelers.”

“We’re going to save a park,” added Carcosa.

“Not to pry,” said Jojo, “but does that make much money?”

“Time travel, or saving parks?”

“Either. Or both.”

“They both make no money,” said Id.

“But you could guess that,” said Carcosa, “because we’re working at Castle Shack.”

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 22d

“I have to admit,” said a third man, who sounded suspiciously like Ambrose, “I didn’t expect to be able to say the Donner Party has eaten the same meat as me.” He thought about it. “I mean the same as I’ve eaten.”

Inside the effigy, Id kicked and karate-chopped, without effect. Carcosa peered out through the woven branches. “Remain unfazed, Id. All we need to do is get back to the Mystery Wall, where our portal awaits.”

“Yeah, but there’s a bunch of wood and dudes in our way.” Id paused for breath. “Hang on. We’re gonna meet Ambrose in the future, right? Doesn’t that mean we have to survive this thing that’s happening right now?”

“Objective future, his future, our past. I fear our personal timeline could easily end now.”

With a snarl, Id went back to kicking. “Time travel makes things way too confusing.”

“I’d draw you a chart, but we’re inside a burning effigy.”

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 22d

Name a better ending to a comic book

Angry lizard is frustrated that you don't get his story

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 23d

Id nodded. She started to ask another question, but the door banged open and college students crowded in.

“Okay,” said the girl at the front of the human blob. “What does everybody want?”

This set off a long argument. Id watched and listened, smiling. Carcosa, in back, was too busy figuring out the deep fryer to pay attention.

“I think we’ve got it,” the girl said at last. “We’re doing four Motte and Bailey Combos, one with double cheese, one with no cheese, one with royal cheese and pickles on the side and one with no bun, two Piers Plowmans, one with lettuce and tomato only, that means no sauce and no onions and pickles on the side again, one Divine Right of Chicken with the combo substitution, we brought our own straws, and an extra Coke with no ice.”

“Welcome to Castle Shack,” said Id. “May I take your order?”

Shaenon K. Garrity@shaenon· 23d

Because I'm a big weeaboo I have given this much thought over the years, and, except for the detail that Akira is a unisex name which makes it even more generic, the nearly perfect English name equivalent is