Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling

@atomiclobstar

He/his Love all animals, especially the unlovable ones. Not a scientist or artist or anything exciting, just a disabled person striving to keep sane in an increasingly off kilter world. And fair warning I tend to post a lot of arachnids and the like

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Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· 24d

sometimes when I am mostly despair I need this, I hope it helps you too

"We are gonna get through this together" comic of an opossum and raccoon crossing a street together to keep each other safe. artist appears to be 2birds1pencil

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· 29d

Is this the new menstruation crustacean station?

2 pictures of a plastic shark on a toilet tank, in the first one the mouth is closed and in the second one it is open to show whats inside, period supplies! The text accompanying them is Blue head icon: Can I get a pad? Me: In the shark Blue head icon: What? The second picture is the same text just this time you can see the shark mouth is open to show period supplies,

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· 29d

I HAVE A FLAMINGO MEME! :D (I had a flamingo meme sadly, when I am back from mowing I will find it I promise)

Flamingo on its back in the water with legs akimbo and looking kind of goofy.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 13

Omg this reminded me of my fave card from The Big Bang Theory

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #262

As best as I can tell, life is intolerable. Oh, not always of course. A case can be made for all the big wonders and little blessings and blah, blah, blah. But when you really boil it down, our entire existence rests on a few really ugly premises. First, life, and by that I mean the big life, life with a capital L, must ingest other life in order for it to remain life. Or, put another way, in order to witness the miracle of creation, we must continually eat, and then poop out, a little bit of that miracle. Second, one of the charming side effects of sentient life is emotional pain. The fact that dead and fermenting plant life creates alcohol - a terrific anesthetic for emotional pain - might cause one to think that this is, by nature, a compassionate universe. Think again. Keep dulling that pain with booze and you wind up, if you're lucky, in a church basement sharing your tears with complete strangers. If you're not lucky, you wind up on a waiting list for a motorcyclist's liver. And finally, there is the ever-present knowledge of death. In order to "more fully appreciate the gift of life," we all get to ponder a violently sudden or slow and agonizingly painful descent into oblivion -- after which our beloved bodies turn into the stuff of nightmares. Which brings me back to my original premise: life is intolerable. But rather than go gently into that creepy night, I've decided to start a petition to protest the fundamental conditions of existence. I know it's not much, but it's a start. And damnit, I'm just the guy to do it! The petition is available at chucklorre.com. Sign on now and make your voice heard before you're dead and your vocal chords are being eaten by a swarm of disgusting bugs.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 11

I got the bugshirt version of that but its SO HOT I die when I wear it =/

Male model standing in front of a lake wearing a BugShirt (basically a longsleeved shirt but with breathable mesh under the arms and armpit area and more mesh over the face)

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 11

This is my fave version of that sentiment, bit longer though

Screenshot of a twitter post by themightyglamazon
I enforce federal worker health and safety and pollution regulations.

When I was learning my trade, when my classmates and I were having a chuckle over the "well duh" level of specificity written into the Code of Federal Regulations (try "no hazardous material shall be stored in crew berthing" on for size),I will never forget the silence that followed when our instructor spoke these words:

"Your regulations are written in blood."

These regulations were not written on a whim. They were written because someone thought they could cut costs by storing however many more pounds of a radioactive, toxic, carcinogenic, or whatever else material in the same rooms where the human beings they paid to transport those materials slept, and then did that. because no one was telling them not to.

They were written because people died. Horrifically. Because unregulated capitalism values profit over human life and suffering.

Can I say it again for those not paying attention?

Unregulated capitalism values profit over human life and suffering.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 10

I would go for the Floating Judgment Box

Brown text at the top left of the picture says "Give your cat a place to rest...other than your keyboard" At the bottom in black text with a white background it says "Give your cat the FLOATING JUDGMENT BOX to allow them to stare at your unfinished work from afar" The top 3/4 is a picture of a woman typing on a keyboard and an orange cat sitting in a wooden tray perched on the corner of her desk and staring at her.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 9

I make and print my own, usually they are memes though with text added in mspaint cause my family knows I am very weird. adding a reginald meme to show you what I mean, I think people appreciate I make it for them.

Crab meme with the text in white on a black background

"This is Reginald everyone say "hi Reginald"
He doesn't like the taxman
But remember he on appears on alternating tuesdays
in the upper right corner of the meme is a giant Japanese spider crab

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 9

Wicked cool, AND I learned a new word anadromous

anadromous /ə-năd′rə-məs/
adjective

1. Migrating up rivers from the sea to breed in fresh water. Used of fish.
2. Ascending rivers from the sea, at certain seasons, for breeding, as the salmon, shad, etc.
3. Tending upwards; -- said of terns in which the lowest secondary segments are on the upper side of the branch of the central stem.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition • More at Wordnik

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 6

I saw this one going around and appreciated the sentiment but decided it needed proper alt text.

meme with white text on a black background and a picture at the bottom
gena7125
Mitch McConnell's hospitalization got me thinking.

If a U.S. senator is hospitalized for months and can't vote or represent the people who elected them, why is there no process to determine whether they're still able to serve?

Most Americans have to justify missing a single day of work.

Picture of Mitch McConnell looking especially turtley at the bottom

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 6

but also *cough cough* I went to make one and found this

chipmunk wearing cowboy hat and bandana over the words "avenge me"

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 5

I saw this bumper/tube sticker ages ago for a cyclist

Bumper sticker of a cyclist flying through the air with a tacod front wheel and a car in the background obviously having hit the cyclist and the words "Politicize My Death" on it top and bottom

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 4

Orange cat biting fiercely into a corn on the cob muzzle all wrinkled with the bite force, captioned with the words "You're afraid to be corny" at the top and "but I was born on the cob"

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jul 4

ehehe honestly I was thinking more a bear hiding behind a skinny tree.

Giant brown bear hiding behind a teeny tiny tree, you can basically see the whole bear.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 30

This mama spider? ;D

Mother ambylpygi carrying her young on her back, the mother is black with brown stripes on her rear legs and the young have green abdomens with everything else being white. Photograph is by Jordan Cadiot.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 26

An opossum in a rainbow sweater standing on grass and looking all cute. Captioned at the top with the words "a SPECIAL place in hell? for ME?" and at the bottom "that is actually really thoughtful :) "

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 26

Did your parents do this one too?

Friendly oversized antlered sculpture waving its long metal fingers at you. Its body appears to be made out of antlers and various unidentifiable things including wood and vines.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 25

Sorry it JUST occurred to me this was a birthday post (sometimes I am incredibly dense >.< ) Happy Belated Birthday to one of my fave Bluesky peeps (who has caused me to try so many new crafts I never ever would have dreamed of) here is your birthday lobster!

Blue lobster chilling on the bottom of an aquarium with a photoshopped hat on and captioned with the text "Birthday Pinches coming your way!"

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 23

I'm sorry you made me think of this one

screenshot of a conversation from tumblr or twitter. At the top are two pictures of an eel that looks remarkably like an aged banana all brown spots on yellow background with the following text. "This variant of the Goldentail / Bastard Moray is known as the Banana Eel due to its colouration and markings resembling a ripe banana. (source)
nicepost sorry the what? the what moray
scientist: let's call you the... goldentail
banana eel: [bites scientist]
scientist: Okay motherfucker, new idea:

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 23

Rue is her name, Kanga-Rue is Moms nickname for her. I call her weasel, jerkface, and so many other things which I am of course drawing a blank on now.

Tabby kitty named Rue laying on her side on my Moms lap with her left front foot keeping Mom from turning the page in her book.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 22

tdpelmedia.com/bbc-presente... the article the quote is from, its on how to clear out the hot air inside the car double quick. Its by BBC presenter and scientist Hannah Fry.

Screenshot of a section from an article.

Instead, here’s what she does:

Open a window on the opposite side of the driver—like the rear left window if you’re in the driver’s seat.
Then, and here’s the fun part, rapidly open and close the driver’s door a few times.

Yes, she admits you might “look like a bit of an idiot,” but trust the process.
The Science Behind the Weird-Looking Door Flap

It might seem silly, but here’s how it works.

According to Fry, when you swing the door open and shut quickly, it creates an area of low pressure that pushes the hot air out.

This movement causes something called “bulk flow,” which basically forces the stifling hot air inside the car to rush out.

With the window open on the other side, fresh air flows in to replace the hot air that just got swept away.

Do it two or three times and boom—your car’s temperature drops dramatically.

“Suddenly it’s beautifully temperate,” she says.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 17

They are basically endless on Amazon, the design varies slightly but just look for one that uses batteries not plugin like this one.

Portable bidet from Bathkity showing it stretched out and folded up to fit in its reservoir. Also pictured is its box and charging cord.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 17

feels like this summarizes my feelings nicely

Screenshot of comments from the article that nicely summarizes my feeling
Ducker
9 hours ago

Great idea, far too expensive.
El Elsatico
8 hours ago

2000's stylings, 2020's pricing. I feel I could have gotten this phone free when I started a new contract with T-mobile...
Mate are you joking
10 hours ago

Five hundred dollarydoos?!
steve
8 hours ago

I'll stick with my $35 dollar Samsung flip, from Wal-Mart.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 16

Testing the whole never too late thing. ;)

Rue my tabby kitty, with her little paws crossed as she lies on her side with her face half in shadow and one of her paws on Moms book to keep her from turning the page.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 16

Why we don't "nope" here...or "burn the house down" or "kill it with fire:"
Because even if it's hilarious, it promotes the idea that spiders are disgusting, dangerous or scary. Many people kill every spider they see, because of this idea. We want people to unlearn this idea. Almost every spider you see is harmless. The negative stereotypes of spiders are based in a culture of ignorance and superstition. We like spiders here. We hope everyone will learn to like them. Spider picture at the top just underneath the first 5 words, a small brown/yellow papery sort. At the bottom it identifies the spider type and photographer in yellow text Matidia sp (Clubionidae) Morowali, Sulawesi, Indonesia by Arlo Pelegrin

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 12

White text on black background consisting of these words: Fuck off. Then keep fucking off. Keep fucking off until you get to a gate with a sign saying "you cant fuck off past here." Climb over the gate, dream the impossible dream, and keep fucking off forever.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 11

Happy 40th Birthday Jordan 🥳

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 9

I know chicken coops need an underground apron of hardware cloth to keep certain digging animals out, maybe you need the same? Sorry if you already have that btw, I neglected to search your timeline for fence pictures and now this would all be too hard to retype >.<

A chicken coop with at least two feet of hardware cloth prepared to be buried under the dirt that has been excavated.

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 4

Stealing for my own purposes.

A man putting wood into a woodchipper. Text reads "wtf why is he putting logs in the landlord machine"

Atomic Lobster, still wishing ill on JK Rowling@atomiclobstar· Jun 2

It kind of reminds me of this old xkcd