beanietvq

@beanietvq

(she/her) A mom, grieving parent, liberal voter, LGBTQ supporter, pet mom & lady who is always knitting, living with grief and gratitude. (pic is of all my kids) 💕 ~Colleen

1.278 Folgt1.572 Follower1.874 Posts

Bluesky

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beanietvq@beanietvq· 8d

The only way I can get through my life without my son David in it is to be grateful for the time he was here. #grief

My son David looking at me and smiling, wearing a hoodie, and holding his white dog, Shiro who is also looking at me.

beanietvq@beanietvq· 14d

Our kitten is sleeping on our mantle next to the walnut wooden box holding the ashes of my son’s earthly body. Until it’s your family member you can only speculate about how you’d feel having ashes permanently in your home. For us, it’s where he belongs. #grief

A black and white 5 month old kitten is sleeping on a white fireplace mantle, next to a beautiful simple walnut box. With a bunting of hearts made from old quilt piece draped over the hearth. The kitten is resting his head on one of the hearts.

beanietvq@beanietvq· 16d

One of my two outdoor kitties is letting everyone know that this is her house. She first hissed at me all the time and ran away. Now she meows and will get within a foot of me but doesn’t want me to pet her…yet. #cats

My smaller outdoor cat is sitting contentedly on my front walkway.

beanietvq@beanietvq· 17d

Randy, the terror, resting on his high perch between attacks. #caturday

A small black and white kitten is sleeping on the top of a cat case bookcase with cat hiding spots. He is barely noticeable lying flat with one white paw hanging over the front of the case and his black tail hanging off the back. The shelf has a Swedish horse, a crystal candle holder, an oval picture frame, and a stack of folded midcentury tablecloths.

beanietvq@beanietvq· 19d

#grief #hope Bluesky and its word limit… This go-around is crazy bad.

Photo of text: “We mourn those who’ve died, rightly so. We miss them and wish they were still here. But maybe they aren’t missing anything. My life is divided into the before and the after of my son’s death. This after part may be a very long time. But I can’t help but hope that this is but one journey we take with souls we’ve known forever. His timeline just didn’t overlap with mine as long as I would have wished this go-around.” ~Colleen

beanietvq@beanietvq· 20d

Cancer was surgically removed from my body this week. I’ll hear next week about the lab findings. My office sent me this kitty doctor flower arrangement. This is the cutest!

A flower arrangement that looks like a doctor kitty, made with white carnations and felt pieces for the cat’s nose, black whiskers, green eyes, and white and pink ears. The kitty is holding a red medical bag. So cute.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jul 12

The notification of movement at my door at 3:38am didn’t scare me. I thought it was a community cat. It was not. It was the man below. He was talking. I was scared even though I was safely inside. A second video recorded more and then he left. Only a few seconds. Watch with sound on. #notallmen

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jul 11

Gilda peeking. #caturday #diligent

Our 4 year old tabby cat named Gilda is curled up, with one eye slightly open and one shut, resting (diligently) on a folded grey wool blanket atop a cream colored coverlet on my queen bed. A pillow, the white metal bed frame, dark green wall and a framed print of a woman in a field are in the background.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 27

Randy resting. #caturday

A black and white kitten stretched out very long covering his face with his paw and napping on a chair next to a needlepoint pillow.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 27

Randy sitting in a light fixture in a box playing with a hanging kitty toy. #caturday

A black and white kitten inside a milk glass light fixture in a box playing with a hanging cat toy.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 23

@walterrhein.bsky.social knows what he’s talking about: “Republicans are authoritarian socialists Start saying that They don’t know what to do The definition is that they take taxpayer dollars and give them to billionaires”

Republicans are authoritarian socialists

Start saying that

They don’t know what to do

The definition is that they take taxpayer dollars and give them to billionaires

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 20

My bridge in my City by the Bay.

San Francisco with the top of the Golden Gate Bridge peeking above the trees.

The Golden Gate Bridge from the Presidio.

The Golden Gate Bridge from the Palace of Legion of Honor.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 17

Kittens fall asleep on a dime. Randy fell asleep playing with the banner on the mantle.

A tiny fuzzy black & white kitten is sleeping on a white mantle top cuddled on a single tree of a tree shaped banner piece hanging off the mantle.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 10

When your kitten naps with you after giving you cat scratch fever…priceless. #cats

Randy, our tiny tuxedo kitten rests quietly next to me resting on my bed to get over the cat scratch fever he inadvertently gave me. He is laying between a grey pillow and my orange cotton blanket.

The tinier version of Randy, our tuxedo kitten, on a pouf covered with a pink and white crocheted blanket.

beanietvq@beanietvq· Jun 1

Our shark-toothed kitten just bit my arm waggle. Safe to say, if he’s awake he’s teething.

Tiny black and white kitten is playing with a hanging strip of pompoms with his sharp teeth.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 31

I put my living room curtains today. It involved lots of squats to pick up stuff I dropped in the process.

A bright living room by the entry to our home. floor to ceiling curtains, a 6 ft plant, a corner lamp, a big L-shaped sofa and a coffee table with a dog bed under it.
And a sconce by the door that was temporarily crooked.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 30

Fun fact: A Doberman cannot gently touch a face. Those paws are inadvertent weapons. Our 1 year old mama Doberman named Cookie, who joined our family as a rescue 2 months ago, is sitting on a bed with our very small kitten, Randy, who joined our family a week ago. #caturday #dogs

Our 1 year old mama Doberman named Cookie, who joined our family as a rescue 2 months ago, is sitting on a bed with our very small kitten, Randy, who joined our family a week ago.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 30

Sometimes convincing a spicy busy kitten to rest is simply throwing covers over him. #caturday

With only his back legs and tail showing, a small black and white kitten sleeps under covers thrown back to cover him.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 27

Our two big dogs are working on getting to know our very small kitten. He is not overwhelmed. He’s very quick and very smart. (Kitten far left). #pets #dogs #cats #kittens

A dark green bedroom with a queen bed on the left wall and sunlight streaming in through a big window on the far wall covered with curtains with only the sheer curtain closed. On the bed are a 1.5 lb kitten (hiding behind the pillows), a 75 lb lab mix laying mid bed and a 71 lb Doberman sitting at the right at the foot of the bed.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 25

Kitten napping where the dogs might not find him: Kitten on a bed hiding behind the decorative pillows, fast asleep. I’m smitten.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 25

This is Randy. He joined our family last night. He is 12 to 14 weeks old and is very tiny (1.5 lbs). He has lots of spunk. #cats

Randy, a tuxedo kitten, is sitting in a decorative birdhouse on the island in our kitchen. He’s exploring!

A small black and white tuxedo cat named Randy is sleeping on a soft blanket in a large cardboard box. The box also contains a small litter box and two bowls, one filled with kitten food and one filled with water. There is also one little stuffed cat toy in the box.
Randy’s box is by my bed. Last night he slept quietly for 5 hours.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 24

This set of windows makes me smile. I love our home. I love sharing it with my daughter, son, and our pets. I’m grateful for my life.

A set of 3 kitchen windows with old stained glass windows hanging in them. The sills have plants and precious little objects. The kitchen sink and counter is lined with antique pitchers, a canister set in olive green, and other kitcheny items. A Jo Malone London candle sits on my candle warmer making the house smell beautiful.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 22

I love my quiet mornings before a word is spoken. Photo of my view from my bed of my open closet door, mirror on the wall & floral artwork on my deep green walls. There’s a glimpse of my white metal bed frame, my antique walnut dresser. My son’s red “SPORTS” hat hangs off my dresser mirror hinge.

Photo of my view from my bed of my open closet door, my mirror on the wall and floral artwork on my deep green walls. There’s a glimpse of my white metal bed frame and my antique walnut dresser. My son’s red “SPORTS” hat hangs off my dresser mirror hinge.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 17

Do I purchase these embroidered pillows or no? #vote

Two 13” square pillows with embroidered flowers oranges and yellows. Poppies etc.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 17

I saw my first hummingbird at my new home! After enjoying nectar from the bloom on our trumpet vine, he/she came over to say hello to me with their vertical red line on their throat (Anna’s Hummingbird?). I’m putting up my hummingbird feeder now. This brings me much joy! Photo: trumpet vine flower

Our orange trumpet vine blossom (which attracted my hummingbird) is engulfing the fruit tree in our yard. My 1996 BMW 238is is in the background and our newly planted Kurapia plugs are spreading in the dirt.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 16

I appreciate the positive potential of Fridays. I get home when it’s still light out and have unencumbered time stretching out before me… Enjoy your weekend! From Mathilda’s Bloombox: Pink peonies, sweet peas, hydrangea, saphorina, star of Bethlehem.

On my mantle sits a Frankoma vase with a beautiful spring bouquet from this week’s delivery from Mathilda’s Bloombox.
Pink peonies, sweet peas, hydrangea, saphorina, star of Bethlehem.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 15

“heard a girl say that when she feels stuck, she imagines herself at 85yrs old & gets a chance to come back to her younger body for a day. suddenly, everything feels like magic again. the walk, the coffee, the music, the sunlight. live like today is the miracle it actually is!!!” ~ Silvia, Substack

From Substack, a post by Silvia: heard a girl say that when she feels stuck, she imagines herself at 85yrs old & gets a chance to come back to her younger body for a day. suddenly, everything feels like magic again. the walk, the coffee, the music, the sunlight. live like today is the miracle it actually is!!!

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 14

The outdoor kitty’s food bowl was empty when we got a visitor last night.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 13

alt text allows us to say what’s on our minds. Reminder: Every grieving parent loves to hear their child’s name. It reminds us that others have not forgotten them. When people talk to me about David, it makes me smile.

My son died in his sleep in the bedroom across from my own, a few steps from his sister’s room and down the hall from his brother. We carried on living where he had died because it was also where we made so many memories together.

He certainly didn’t die there on purpose.

We felt protective of our space. Knowing that others would be put off by a death having occurred in our home, we stayed to honor and preserve the memories of our wonderful life together as a family.

Death doesn’t have to make people feel uncomfortable. The consequences of a death are not settled in a few months or even years. My kids and I live on with the added responsibility of keeping David’s memory alive. It’s not a burden.

The Disney movie, Coco, tells it spot on the money. We never want our loved ones to be forgotten.

beanietvq@beanietvq· May 12