Swamp Witch 🌱🌼

@beneathhergaze

Terminally online witch & wordsmith. Vehemently anti-AI. DCTID. Pronouns whatever; gender is a tool of oppression. Zum Glück bin ich verrückt. Any mansplaining incurs a $50 fee. Unblocking fee $100. "If you don't want to be in a poem, don't fuck a poet."

205 Folgt4.126 Follower19.243 Posts

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Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir beneathhergaze.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 12

Today's hair scarf

Photo of a dark teal blue narrow hair scarf with a pattern of scarlet red crabs across it.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 11

Imagine seeing a 6'1" femme in a sundress so thin it's practically just a suggestion, holding a bursting bouquet of flowers, and thinking "nah, not worth my time to even try to say hi"

Photo of half of OP's face hidden behind a massive bouquet of homegrown flowers.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 11

PAPER THIN

Photo of OP's lap as they sit in a car with the skirt of their dress spread out. The sun coming through the car windows is shining through their thin dress and displaying the perfect outline of their lower leg and foot, implying that they are on the verge of literal nudity if the light shines just right.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 11

If this doesn't get me railed, I stg

Photo of OP taking a selfie in a full-length mirror while wearing a lemon-print black sundress, thin black sandals, a green bakelite bangle, green seed bead ankle bracelet, and a lemon-print black hairscarf.

OP in the same full-length mirror as before but the photo angle is over the shoulder so you can see their strong back and muscular, shapely legs.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 8

They're calling me the most mentally not-ill person ever to exist

Photo of a bathroom sink and surrounding countertop totally covered in wisps and clumps of freshly-cut dark red hair. The context is that drastically cutting one's hair is the universal sign of "one bad sneeze away from a complete mental breakdown", which is correct for OP at this precise time.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 6

I found a screencap of one of the later revised/truncated versions of the bio essay:

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 6

Honorable mention to this one as well:

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 6

I wrote a very long and beautiful essay on my Okcupid profile back in the day that introduced people to who I am and what I was after (including that I'm a writer, ofc) and I received this as a response:

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 3

I just went through over 500 open tabs accumulated over 5 years on two separate phones to print and close every single recipe tab I have ever left open in my Firefox bc I'm getting tired of beloved or potential new recipes suddenly turning into "PAGE NOT FOUND". I feel so accomplished.

Photo of a white left hand holding a stack of printer paper at least an inch thick against a cranberry-colored carpet.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 2

He's practicing for school pictures, Cait, obv

Photo of an orange cat with one crumply ear posing with his mouth open mid-meow. He has been superimposed atop one of those laser backgrounds used for school portraits in the 90s.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jul 2

My patio table citronella candle melted 😞

Photo of a black square candle holder on a table covered in a beige protective sheath. The candle holder is full of a yellowish clear liquid, which is melted candle wax. The wick has sunk to the bottom of the pool of wax and is lying there drooped sadly over itself like a flaccid phallus.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 29

Haaland eats like Abu from the bread scene in Aladdin

Photo of Erling Haaland eating at a table with a lunch tray. His cheeks are so full of food that he looks cartoonishly squirrel-like, like he's somehow new to the concept of eating food and doesn't know you don't need to eat like a barnyard animal.

Screenshot of the bread scene from Aladdin where Abu the monkey refuses to share his bread with the kids digging for food from the trash. He's hunched over clinging to his bread possessively and glaring upwards, cheeks bulging with chewed bread.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 28

Wasn't kidding

Photo of OP's torso from overhead. They're wearing a leafy green high-neck rubbed tanktop and a pair of loose cotton wide-leg trousers with a very jungle-y pattern of monstera and caladium leaves.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 28

Yeah, sure you can see, y'all have been good lately

Photo of OP taking a selfie in a bathroom mirror while wearing a black t-shirt and black gothy skirt.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 27

I compromised

Photo of OP's upper torso, which is breasting boobily beneath a red crop top with black lace trim around the collar and shoulders. The crop top reads "SINNER".

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 27

STEVPHEN NOMIDDLENAMEGIVEN STEVERS.

Horrified cartoon character in an orange shirt staring at his computer monitor in disgust.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 26

We got the fresh bedding tho, none finer 😩🤌

Photo of a bed with sage green cotton sheets and two white/off-white cotton blankets atop. The covers have been drawn back and OP's lower legs & feet are flopped over the bed where the covers were. OP's toenails are painted a vibrant orange-scarlet color.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 26

The Stu Pickles Making Chocolate Pudding Meme where Didi Pickles from Rugrats comes in to confront Stu over making stovetop chocolate pudding for Angelica after she fakes breaking her leg. The phrasing in the first panel of this version has been edited. It currently reads as follows:

First panel, Didi speaking -- "It's four o'clock in the morning. Why on earth are you rinsing henna out of your hair and making your bed?"
Second panel, Stu responds -- "Because I've lost control of my life."

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 26

...is this a bot?? What on earth

Screenshot of the Bluesky post above, with a response from raedawnhuffer.bsky.social that reads:

"Totally false. Why this again you mouldy harpy, jealous much mf? FIFA looked into it AT THE HIGHEST GIANNI LEVEL SO. Gotta be something else here".

It should be noted that OP has never once interacted with this person, has no idea who they are, and had never before commented on the Turkish coach or team at all so it's not abundantly clear what this person is complaining about.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 25

Boy howdy, there sure is! Meet Ste. Apollonia, who had her teeth either smashed out or torn out by pincers for preaching Christianity in Egypt and later burned alive rather than renounce her faith. She is the patron saint of teeth and dentists.

Photo of page 147 from the book "Mystics Saints and Sages" by Judika Illes, which talks about Ste. Apollonia's attributes.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 24

Like this kind of thing? I picked this kit up randomly ages ago but I don't have nearly enough flowers to do anything fun yet at my house so I haven't touched it

Photo of a white right hand holding a small blue and silver packet labeled "Sunprint Kit".

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 23

Done

Photo of a white left hand holding a freshly pressed 2.25" button/pin/badge. It is made of gold foil with letters cut out from the newspaper in varying colors, and the letters read "T4T (trash 4 trash)".

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 19

Volume up if you want to hear it, I guess. It's not doing a great job of being captured on video but I can identify specific songs with ease bc it's playing so loudly in my house lmao

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 17

Holy shit you got him to nuke his account, bless

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 15

Next one to tackle: my too-big-potted, under-sunned, spindly-ass dracaena marginata who's been with me for like 8 years despite an obscene amount of neglect and failure on my part.

A very thin, dull-looking dracaena marginata in a massive pot better intended for a ficus tree. It's still alive and growing but is definitely not thriving in its current setup.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 15

Good tiny houseplant morning to you all

Photo of a white windowsill with seven various small potted houseplants resting atop: a small snake's tongue, two types of dracaenae, a small sedum succulent, a variegated philodendron, an orange spider plant, and a haworthia. In the foreground, a large rock salt lamp rests atop a black computer speaker. A large white computer monitor acts as a fence of sorts to keep the plants in place.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 15

Puttered around starting seeds until it was too dark to see

Photo of the inside of a small greenhouse. There are green wire shelves all along one side that are full of plants and seed starter trays. On the other side, there is a turquoise baker's rack with a green potting mat atop the table portion, a lavender tote box full of potting soil on the bottom shelf, several small tools strewn across the shelves on top and a hand-sewn apron with seed packet pattern hangs from one of the corners. It is dark outside, but there is a string of lights outside giving everything a warm, calming glow.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 14

Hokay well I finally took the plunge and did it Pray for me that these cuttings are going to root and thrive; I want them to live 😭

Photo of a floral & black potting mat with a pair of work gloves, set of orange pruners, and a grey shoe tray inside it. On the shoe tray, there is a large shallow terracotta pot with a freshly pruned & repotted bunny ear cactus leaning against a trellis made from bamboo skewers & cotton string. There are also 13 thin, elongated pieces of cactus lying on the tray awaiting callusing so they can hopefully be repotted in 24 hours and grow with the mama cactus.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 14

SPORPSMAXXINGGGGG

Photo of a desk with a computer setup that has three monitors simultaneously showing sports games. The left monitor is showing the Knicks v Spurs basketball game, the top right monitor is displaying the DCFC v Sporting Jax soccer game, and the bottom right monitor is displaying the Haiti v Scotland World Cup soccer game.

Swamp Witch 🌱🌼@beneathhergaze· Jun 13

MICHIGAN FOLKS ESP. DETROITERS: Friendly was fuckin stolen from a staffer's car last night. Please keep your eyes/ears open; we need our beloved dumpster bear back. The offending party has 24hrs to return him unharmed or I will personally curse 9 generations of his descendants. @detcityfc.com #DCTID