The total collapse of the archive that once contained all human intelligence is pretty funny sometimes.
Don't let the haters tell you this was an accident. We've been planning this for years. It's the only reason we started Bigfeets. www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ppch...
This poster is designed so that, viewing it clockwise from top left, every single thing you look at is funnier than the last.
Buy my new book, I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200. Here's the best review: "Horror book too scary for me, 1 star."
As spotted by a reader at @powells.bsky.social. Honestly, the dream has always been for my hometown to refer to me as "local madman."
Officially nesting in a dark corner of Twisted Spine for the next couple hours. I will sign your book or fight you, depending on your request.
Brooklyn, you're a bunch of cowards. You don't have the nerve to attend this event, buy a book, politely chat for a bit and then leave without a scene.
I'm going to be signing books at The Twisted Spine THIS Saturday, March 28th, from 3-5PM. This is the ONLY signing event I have planned. This is your LAST chance to serve me papers before I disappear into the wilds of Connecticut.
I'm doing an AMA over at Reddit's r/Fantasy right now! As in currently, the moment you exist in. It's all there is. Take advantage of it by asking a stranger an inane question he is legally obligated to answer. www.reddit.com/r/Fantasy/co...
Resident Evil 9 is a masterpiece. Everybody wants a KLR 650 in their goofy ass chase scene, but nobody wants to commit to the pokka pokka one big cylinder engine sound. True artistic integrity.
Doing an AMA on Reddit's r/Fantasy next week! Mark your calendars, or more likely make a quick mental note of it, forget it completely during the week, then go "oh right" when you accidentally stumble across it again, far too late to participate.
This is the influencer letter I wrote as part of the marketing campaign for I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200. My editor called it "insulting in a captivating way."
Welp, this isn't the first time I've lost my life savings, but it is the fastest.
Just got this. No deal. I appreciate the hustle but the bet was for multiple firearms. Side note: This is starting to worry me.
Reader sent me this. Gonna go sink my life savings into a Polymarket bet that this is the only time anyone will ever pose my book with multiple firearms.
It's been out for one month and I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200 has 500+ ratings and 140 reviews on Goodreads. Still sitting at about 4 1/2 stars*. Incredible. *You will allow me the dignity of rounding up.
You actually need to buy it. Sarah asked me for inspiration and I sent her Troom Troom. You need to make her sacrifice worth it.
The audiobook of I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend is incredible. Sarah Mollo-Christensen did a wonderful job with my weird, demanding script. It's so good I'm giving away an Audible copy to prove it. Reply here, I'll pick someone at random! www.audible.com/pd/I-Will-Ki...
I know it still says sold out or on backorder a few places, but I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200 is entering its THIRD print run. We will get your books to you! It's too late to change your mind. They're coming. They're on the way. They will find you. God, they're so hungry.
And my favorite subgenre of review: People who are mad at me for tricking them with a cute cover and and a shitpost title and then ambushing them with feelings.
Now that release week is here there are more reviews than I can post, so I'll just show you some of my favorites.
Spotted my new book in the wild at the local @barnesandnoble.com in Manchester, CT. Did some light vandalizing.
It's release day for I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200! It exists now as an item in the world. It should be at your local bookstore. If it's not, if your local bookstore doesn't stock the best books, I see no reason why they should exist. You know what I mean. linktr.ee/killyourimag...
Just got word I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200 is going into a second printing before launch day. That's amazing news, but the second run probably won't have foil lettering or sprayed edges. If you want the most beautiful version of this book, buy it soon! linktr.ee/killyourimag...
It's your last week to get the I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200 preorder discount and exclusive bonus story! Because the book launches NEXT WEEK. Time is a joke and we're all the butt of it. bookshop.org/p/books/i-wi...